|
0/4
|
25%
|
This Means War (2012) |
"
Reese Witherspoon isn't an idiot, and yet she made "This Means War," which leads to the question: Was this some temporary lapse in judgment or was this the best offer she had?"
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 16, 2012
|
|
0/4
|
24%
|
What's Your Number? (2011) |
"
He is borderline evil, and she is a completely helpless, flailing fool, and there's no reason to think they would stay together for a month."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Sep 29, 2011
|
|
0/4
|
90%
|
Attack the Block (2011) |
"
It's surprising this thing ever got released."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 28, 2011
|
|
0/4
|
42%
|
Faster (2010) |
"
The Rock didn't start calling himself by his actual name, Dwayne Johnson, so he could make garbage like "Faster.""
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Nov 23, 2010
|
|
0/4
|
6%
|
The Last Airbender (2010) |
"
A dull, boring, poorly acted, limply written and thoroughly unappealing fantasy, featuring bland characters locked in a struggle of no interest."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
0/4
|
12%
|
Love Ranch (2010) |
"
Love Ranch is less than two hours long, but it feels longer. Much longer -- as in long enough for the Rostovs to marry off Natasha and for Napoleon to retreat from Moscow."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
0/4
|
37%
|
Gigantic (2009) |
"
Anyone can go off and just cynically make a bad movie, but to make a picture as inert, incompetent and emotionally fraudulent as Gigantic takes sincere faith that one is, in fact, making something really, really good."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Apr 10, 2009
|
|
0/4
|
49%
|
La Terza Madre (Mother of Tears: The Third Mother) (2007) |
"
Aside from being vile and repellent, it's mainly dull -- old-fashioned in its shock tactics and culminating in a ho-hum climax."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Oct 18, 2008
|
|
0/4
|
16%
|
Untraceable (2008) |
"
As plain awful as Untraceable is, possibly the worst thing about it is that it pretends to mean something."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 25, 2008
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
License to Wed (2007) |
"
There's bad, there's awful and there's horrible, and then somewhere beyond that, in its own Kingdom of Lousy -- where all the milk curdles and the jokes aren't funny -- is License to Wed."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 3, 2007
|
|
0/4
|
11%
|
Pathfinder (2007) |
"
No more than a minute into this, and it becomes obvious that the next 98 are going to be trouble."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Apr 13, 2007
|
|
0/4
|
2%
|
Epic Movie (2007) |
"
Satire points up and emphasizes truths that have gone unnoticed, punctures pretension and tweaks the self-important. Audiences laugh at the unexpected revelation of truth. Epic Movie does none of that."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 30, 2007
|
|
0/4
|
22%
|
The Pink Panther (2006) |
"
If The Pink Panther has any value at all, it's in the way its failure demonstrates the delicate nature of comedy, and the skill of other comedies by contrast."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 10, 2006
|
|
0/4
|
13%
|
The Dukes of Hazzard (2005) |
"
In stiff competition for the lamest thing ever put on celluloid."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 5, 2005
|
|
0/4
|
58%
|
Last Days (2005) |
"
Seamlessly and rather cleverly, without telling anybody, Gus Van Sant has transitioned out of important filmmaking and has taken up a new career in torture."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 22, 2005
|
|
0/4
|
5%
|
Harry + Max (Harry and Max) (2005) |
"
Seems like the work of a novice, with self-conscious expository passages and emotionally false conversations."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Apr 29, 2005
|
|
0/4
|
——
|
Junked (2005) |
"
Almost unwatchable."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Nov 18, 2004
|
|
0/4
|
76%
|
Team America - World Police (2004) |
"
As puppetry, Team America is stilted. As satire, it's gutless and lazy. And as comedy, it barely delivers laughs."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Oct 15, 2004
|
|
0/4
|
22%
|
AVP - Alien Vs. Predator (2004) |
"
Take a wretched premise. Imagine the worst picture that could be made from it. Then imagine something even worse."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 16, 2004
|
|
0/4
|
23%
|
Van Helsing (2004) |
"
A big, loud, boring wreck."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted May 7, 2004
|
|
0/4
|
22%
|
Nine Dead Gay Guys (9 Dead Gay Guys) (2002) |
"
If garbage could think, it would look down on 9 Dead Gay Guys as garbage."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 9, 2004
|
|
0/4
|
9%
|
Marci X (2003) |
"
Marci X plays like a satire made by people who don't know the worlds they're satirizing."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 25, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
Gigli (2003) |
"
The most thoroughly joyless and inept film of the year, and one of the worst of the decade."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 1, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
28%
|
It Runs in the Family (2003) |
"
Achingly long and pointless, Runs is a movie about family that's dishonest in its presentation of every relationship."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Apr 25, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
60%
|
Gerry (2003) |
"
Ragingly bad art that contributes to a definition of independent film as something no one would want to sit through."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 28, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
66%
|
Shanghai Knights (2003) |
"
A desperately unfunny action comedy, mirthless not only in its effect on an audience but in its whole aura."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 7, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
11%
|
National Security (2003) |
"
Combines a sour story with a repellent lead character, deadly comic schtick and tin-eared direction to produce 90 minutes of sheer, plodding mirthlessness."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 17, 2003
|
|
0/4
|
5%
|
Swept Away (2002) |
"
Even camp status eludes this tepid and misguided picture."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Oct 11, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
54%
|
The Transporter (2002) |
"
Routine and rather silly."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Oct 11, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
0%
|
Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (2002) |
"
Two big things are missing -- anything approaching a visceral kick, and anything approaching even a vague reason to sit through it all."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Sep 20, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
3%
|
fear dot com (FeardotCom) (2002) |
"
What we get in FearDotCom is more like something from a bad Clive Barker movie. In other words, it's badder than bad."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 30, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
40%
|
Reign of Fire (2002) |
"
The advantage of a postapocalyptic setting is that it can be made on the cheap. Any rock pile will do for a set. Reign of Fire has the disadvantage of also looking cheap."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jul 12, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
3%
|
McHale's Navy (1997) |
"
By the end, this soporific comedy makes 105 minutes feel more like a two-year hitch."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jun 18, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
70%
|
Romeo + Juliet (1996) |
"
A monumental disaster."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jun 18, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
6%
|
Spy Hard (1996) |
"
Nielsen, with his expert deadpan and sense of comic timing, creates the illusion of humor -- for about 15 minutes."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jun 18, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
23%
|
The Evening Star (1996) |
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jun 18, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
64%
|
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) |
"
The picture shows what happens when a writer (Tarantino) and a director (Rodriguez) come together and reinforce each other's worst tendencies and misconceptions."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jun 18, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
59%
|
Blade II (2002) |
"
It's a bad action movie because there's no rooting interest and the spectacle is grotesque and boring."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Mar 22, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
3%
|
Rollerball (2002) |
"
A remarkable film: Remarkably empty, remarkably noisy, remarkably pleasureless."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 8, 2002
|
|
0/4
|
28%
|
Not Another Teen Movie (2001) |
"
The makers of Not Another Teen Movie should be embarrassed that, in parodying She's All That, they copied most of the plot and then made a movie that bogs down in the same places as the original."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Dec 14, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
22%
|
Bones (2001) |
"
To point out little flaws in this one would be like looking at a demolished car and complaining that the taillight doesn't work."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Oct 25, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
Summer Catch (2001) |
"
Summer Catch is the equivalent of a full-course meal with no calories. It is a mirage of a movie, 100 minutes of nothing."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Aug 24, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
54%
|
Lies (Gojitmal) (1999) |
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Feb 21, 2001
|
|
0/4
|
2%
|
Speed 2 - Cruise Control (1997) |
"
They keep getting worse and worse and worse . . ."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
27%
|
Trixie (2000) |
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
9%
|
The Pest (1997) |
"
Obviously, someone must have told Leguizamo he's a comic genius. Whoever did that isn't his friend."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
44%
|
Men Cry Bullets (1999) |
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
Mrs. Winterbourne (1996) |
"
A straight romantic comedy that depends on Lake's charm and acting ability to keep it afloat. The result is disaster."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
Halloween - The Curse of Michael Myers (Halloween 6) (1998) |
"
This sixth installment, by far the worst in the series, is bland and deadening."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
0/4
|
7%
|
Friends & Lovers (1999) |
"
A cold, stupid bore about people with no goodness, just geniality; no inner life, just impulses."
—
San Francisco Chronicle
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
63%
——
97%
