|
0/4
|
6%
|
The Last Airbender (2010) |
"
It's rare to see a film so choppily edited, poorly scripted and spastically directed that you can barely understand what you're watching."
—
Newsday
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
0/4
|
6%
|
All About Steve (2009) |
"
The film isn't merely unfunny and stupefyingly inane but a depressing waste of money, energy and time, yours included."
—
Newsday
Posted Sep 3, 2009
|
|
0.5/4
|
42%
|
Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (2012) |
"
Offers giant rocks clearly made of Styrofoam and Dwayne Johnson, who fits the same description."
—
Newsday
Posted Feb 10, 2012
|
|
0.5/4
|
88%
|
Rango (2011) |
"
Just when you thought you'd seen everything, here comes Chinatown, the animated version."
—
Newsday
Posted Mar 25, 2011
|
|
0.5/4
|
37%
|
Burlesque (2010) |
"
Burlesque manages what seemed impossible: It is filled with half-naked dancing girls, yet it's still boring."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 3, 2011
|
|
0.5/4
|
37%
|
Gigantic (2009) |
"
Eventually Gigantic decides to become a heartwarmer, and why not? Any ending -- including nuclear devastation or a 1940s musical number -- would have worked, too."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 10, 2009
|
|
1/4
|
36%
|
Battleship (2012) |
"
"Battleship" employs the same nonintelligent strategy as the Hasbro board game: Fire blindly at broad targets and wait for explosions."
—
Newsday
Posted May 17, 2012
|
|
1/4
|
22%
|
Darling Companion (2012) |
"
The dog had the right idea."
—
Newsday
Posted May 4, 2012
|
|
1/4
|
64%
|
Friends With Kids (2012) |
"
[A] crass, shallow cash-in."
—
Newsday
Posted Mar 9, 2012
|
|
1/4
|
59%
|
Wanderlust (2012) |
"
"Wanderlust" feels about as edgy as an early Johnny Carson monologue and slightly less clever than a "Visualize Whirled Peas" bumper-sticker."
—
Newsday
Posted Feb 23, 2012
|
|
1/4
|
74%
|
Big Miracle (2012) |
"
"Big Miracle" might be subtitled, "How Hollywood Turned a Real Story Into Bogus Fiction.""
—
Newsday
Posted Feb 3, 2012
|
|
1/4
|
7%
|
New Year's Eve (2011) |
"
New Year's Eve is a perfect example of why the adjective "Hollywood" is so often used as a pejorative."
—
Newsday
Posted Dec 9, 2011
|
|
|
13%
|
Jonah Hex (2010) |
"
There's just one ingredient missing: anyone with a clue."
—
Newsday
Posted Jul 6, 2010
|
|
|
49%
|
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010) |
"
In a rare moment of insight, the teenage but immortal vampires in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse complain about being "frozen" in their lives, unable to "move forward." So is everyone involved in this deathtrap of a franchise."
—
Newsday
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
|
28%
|
The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009) |
"
This episode is as repetitive as the first, with endless scenes of kissus interruptus punctuated by moody indie-rock songs."
—
Newsday
Posted Nov 18, 2009
|
|
1/4
|
37%
|
New York, I Love You (2009) |
"
New York, I Love You weaves 10 short, trivial vignettes into one long, irritating whole."
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 15, 2009
|
|
|
57%
|
The Invention of Lying (2009) |
"
Ultimately, the small-scale, often downbeat jokes in Lying never quite match the grand concept."
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 2, 2009
|
|
1/4
|
17%
|
Love Happens (2009) |
"
Love happens in Love Happens, along with hearts, flowers, wine, roses, sweetness, light and every other cliche the filmmakers can squeeze into a two-hour film."
—
Newsday
Posted Sep 16, 2009
|
|
|
75%
|
Julie & Julia (2009) |
"
Meryl Streep, as Child, is this film's butter; everything else is garnish."
—
Newsday
Posted Aug 6, 2009
|
|
|
13%
|
The Ugly Truth (2009) |
"
The film's central romance flips and flops like a dying fish."
—
Newsday
Posted Jul 23, 2009
|
|
1/4
|
46%
|
Management (2009) |
"
It's a handful of ostensibly quirky ideas glued together by irritatingly conventional devices."
—
Newsday
Posted May 14, 2009
|
|
1/4
|
53%
|
Viva (2007) |
"
You can't create camp on purpose."
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 18, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
70%
|
Religulous (2008) |
"
It's a nasty, condescending, small-minded film, self-amused and ultimately self-defeating. Its only accomplishment is to make atheists look bad -- and in this political climate they didn't need Maher's help with that."
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 2, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
9%
|
Everybody Wants to Be Italian (2007) |
"
Romantic comedies don't always have the strongest concepts, but Everybody Wants to Be Italian begins with what barely qualifies as an idea."
—
Newsday
Posted Sep 4, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
19%
|
Fly Me to the Moon (2008) |
"
The animation is so stiff it makes South Park look like Walt Disney's Fantasia."
—
Newsday
Posted Aug 15, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
19%
|
Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) |
"
The Lucas universe once held a special magic, but The Clone Wars makes that feel like a long time ago in a theater far, far away."
—
Newsday
Posted Aug 15, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
54%
|
Mamma Mia! (2008) |
"
The ingredients seem perfect: a stellar cast, an unassailable soundtrack and source material from a proven hit. Somehow, though, this sugary mix turns into a sour hairball that will have you gagging to expel it for 108 minutes."
—
Newsday
Posted Jul 17, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
49%
|
La Terza Madre (Mother of Tears: The Third Mother) (2007) |
"
Dario Argento's ketchupy brand of horror hasn't aged well, nor have his sexual politics. Enjoyably campy at first, then offensive and ultimately just bad."
—
Newsday
Posted Jun 5, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
45%
|
The Strangers (2008) |
"
Writer and first-time director Bryan Bertino wastes his taut, tense premise -- two lovers, three villains, one house -- by depending on wearingly familiar tricks."
—
Newsday
Posted May 30, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
68%
|
Redbelt (2008) |
"
Redbelt fails on nearly every level, from its incoherent story line to its threadbare action sequences."
—
Newsday
Posted May 1, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
38%
|
Where in the World Is Osama Bin Laden? (2008) |
"
It won't spoil anything to reveal that Spurlock doesn't find his man, but his failure to do so -- even though it's played for laughs -- is a cowardly cop-out that unintentionally mocks the very real dangers of life in the Middle East."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 17, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
67%
|
How She Move (2008) |
"
Somewhere between the acrobatic dance sequences and lead-footed script of How She Move there exist fleeting glimpses of a serious film that could have been."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 24, 2008
|
|
1/4
|
16%
|
The Perfect Holiday (2007) |
"
Ostensibly a Christmastime comedy about romance, The Perfect Holiday manages to be none of the above."
—
Newsday
Posted Dec 11, 2007
|
|
1/4
|
12%
|
Feel the Noise (2007) |
"
Instead of trying to find the heartbeat of reggaetón, the movie resorts to teen conventions, banking that its target audience -- Latino teens, who don't often see themselves onscreen -- won't know enough to demand better."
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 8, 2007
|
|
1/4
|
85%
|
Bamako (2006) |
"
Much of the nearly two-hour film consists of impassioned but lengthy speeches about interest rates, deficits, poverty and corruption. This is no way to entertain an audience, so Sissako throws in a few hastily drawn characters and a threadbare plot."
—
Newsday
Posted Feb 14, 2007
|
|
1/4
|
10%
|
Pulse (2006) |
"
The technophobic horror flick Pulse is a cautionary tale that could have been dreamed up by a frustrated parent: If you don't get off of that computer, kids, you'll turn into a zombie."
—
Newsday
Posted Aug 14, 2006
|
|
1.5/4
|
20%
|
The Lucky One (2012) |
"
The overheated eroticism could have at least made for a camp classic, but the film's chilling narcissism ultimately makes for a pleasureless fantasy."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 20, 2012
|
|
1.5/4
|
36%
|
Lockout (2012) |
"
There's cheap, and then there's this rip-off."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 13, 2012
|
|
1.5/4
|
31%
|
Man on a Ledge (2012) |
"
A clumsily made thriller with very few thrills."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 27, 2012
|
|
1.5/4
|
35%
|
Red Tails (2012) |
"
"Red Tails" has genuine admiration for the sacrifices and achievements made by the Tuskegee Airmen, but they deserve a better commemoration than this."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 19, 2012
|
|
1.5/4
|
51%
|
Contraband (2012) |
"
Everyone needs a little action now and then, right? Unfortunately, a little action is all you'll get."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 13, 2012
|
|
1.5/4
|
26%
|
Your Highness (2011) |
"
Dudes, we get it."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 15, 2011
|
|
1.5/4
|
14%
|
Yogi Bear (2010) |
"
The movie is the opposite of the cartoons: Everyone's body is in motion, but nobody is using his head."
—
Newsday
Posted Jan 3, 2011
|
|
1.5/4
|
27%
|
Land of the Lost (2009) |
"
Not a children's movie, but a movie for people with childlike minds, Land of the Lost" combines the kind of juvenile humor that might amuse a 14-year-old with a shoddy plot that wouldn't satisfy a 5-year-old."
—
Newsday
Posted Jun 4, 2009
|
|
1.5/4
|
26%
|
The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009) |
"
Like Connor with his women, the film picks up ideas and then drops them. At one point, Connor reflects on Wayne: 'I never figured out why he called me Dutch.' Weirdly, neither do we."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 30, 2009
|
|
1.5/4
|
72%
|
The Great Buck Howard (2009) |
"
The film feels painfully thin."
—
Newsday
Posted Apr 2, 2009
|
|
1.5/4
|
31%
|
Fanboys (2008) |
"
A rote comedy that tries to pay tribute to this much-maligned subculture, but instead resorts to lazy stereotypes and comedy conventions."
—
Newsday
Posted Feb 5, 2009
|
|
1.5/4
|
13%
|
Saw V (2008) |
"
Thank goodness Lionsgate made another Saw film! Otherwise, how would we as a country get to feel good about ourselves while watching humans suffer through prolonged torture, degradation and death?"
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 24, 2008
|
|
1.5/4
|
11%
|
An American Carol (2008) |
"
Is there any filmmaker alive, whether Democrat or Republican, conservative or liberal, capable of producing a truly incisive, intelligent satire about our politically polarized times?"
—
Newsday
Posted Oct 6, 2008
|
|
1.5/4
|
14%
|
My Best Friend's Girl (2008) |
"
The movie spends a lot of time trying to be cute, vulgar and cutely vulgar. But it forgets about character, plot and believability."
—
Newsday
Posted Sep 19, 2008
|
60%
——
97%
