Critics » Jim Hemphill » Rotten
Jim Hemphill

Jim Hemphill

Agrees with the Tomatometer 64% of the time.

Biography:
Reel.com film critic.
Publications:
Reel.com
Total Reviews:
92

Worst Reviewed Films

Showing 1 - 50 of 92
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
0/4 39% Hot Rod (2007) " So lazy and so void of even the most rudimentary sense of storytelling that it showers the viewer with contempt...I've never felt as abused by a filmmaker as I did in Hot Rod." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 3, 2007
0.5/4 2% Epic Movie (2007) " Epic Movie is a comedy that is so spectacularly bad in so many ways that it's almost awe-inspiring -- at every point in the film, every creative choice seems to have been made for precisely the wrong reason." — Reel.com
Posted Feb 3, 2007
1/4 11% Pathfinder (2007) " Pathfinder is simultaneously action-packed and a total bore, a strange movie that never seems to move even though it consists of almost nothing but violence." — Reel.com
Posted Sep 22, 2007
1/4 41% Dedication (2007) " A weird hybrid of hipster art-house film and chick flick in which the warring intentions and attitudes cancel each other out." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 24, 2007
1/4 22% 7 días (2007) " There's virtually no story in the movie, at least none that isn't utterly, completely predictable." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 17, 2007
1/4 8% The Reaping (2007) " The creators of The Reaping don't believe in their own pro-spirituality message, which they're willing to betray in the film's final minutes for the sake of one cheap, totally gimmicky scare." — Reel.com
Posted Apr 5, 2007
1/4 25% Tortilla Heaven (2007) " If Tortilla Heaven is supposed to be a more serious exploration of faith and greed it's a total failure, given that it doesn't address a single question it raises with any depth." — Reel.com
Posted Mar 23, 2007
1/4 20% The Hitcher (2007) " Though the plot is close enough to the 1986 version to earn a screen credit for that film's scriptwriter, Eric Red, the execution is so botched that what was terrifying in the original film becomes coma-inducing in the remake." — Reel.com
Posted Jan 19, 2007
1/4 12% Let's Go To Prison (2006) " Let's Go to Prison announces its desperation right from the opening credits, thanks to a montage of celebrity mug shots and arrest footage suggesting there are still laughs to be had at James Brown and Martha Stewart's expense." — Reel.com
Posted Nov 20, 2006
1/4 13% Shottas (2006) " De Palma and Scorsese breathed new life into the crime genre; Silvera just embalms it." — Reel.com
Posted Nov 3, 2006
1.5/4 53% David & Layla (2007) " The effect is not a rich film with a wide range of tones as the director may have intended, but a schizophrenic mess that ends up working as neither social message movie nor entertainment." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 3, 2007
1.5/4 7% Captivity (2007) " This isn't filmmaking it's shock treatment." — Reel.com
Posted Jul 21, 2007
1.5/4 34% TMNT (2007) " A real downer of a comic book movie." — Reel.com
Posted Mar 31, 2007
2/4 13% Mr. Woodcock (2007) " It's a two-minute trailer unsuccessfully stretched into an 87-minute feature film." — Reel.com
Posted Sep 14, 2007
2/4 24% Halloween (2007) " Rob Zombie's remake of John Carpenter's Halloween is neither the blasphemous affront hardcore fans have feared nor the flat-out masterpiece one might have hoped for from one of modern horror's most distinctive talents." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 31, 2007
2/4 72% Golden Door (2007) " Beautifully made but simple-minded Oscar bait, a film guaranteed to offend no one and to attract a large contingent fans who will love it for the nobility of its intentions and the earnestness of its performances." — Reel.com
Posted May 25, 2007
2/4 49% The Flying Scotsman (2006) " Compressing Obree's story into an hour and a half makes it seem less astonishing than it actually is -- the triumphs seem too easily won, and the problems too quickly resolved." — Reel.com
Posted May 4, 2007
2/4 57% The Hip Hop Project (2006) " the bottom line is that Kazi and his cohorts would be even better served by a film that was more than only intermittently involving, and The Hip Hop Project is not that film." — Reel.com
Posted Apr 27, 2007
2/4 56% Vacancy (2007) " It wants to be Hostel for nice, respectable folks, an objective that ultimately seems to be rather pointless in spite of the obvious talent behind and in front of the camera." — Reel.com
Posted Apr 20, 2007
2/4 70% Amazing Grace (2007) " Characters are so imprisoned by the movie's need to drive home its antislavery message that they become utterly lifeless. Pretty pictures abound in Amazing Grace, but they don't serve to illustrate any ideas or emotions worth wrestling with." — Reel.com
Posted Feb 23, 2007
2/4 57% Perfume: The Story of a Murderer (2006) " The emotional void at the film's center grows larger and larger, until in the movie's penultimate scene even a depiction of graphic mass sexuality fails to be particularly exciting or interesting." — Reel.com
Posted Dec 29, 2006
2/4 21% Arthur and the Invisibles (Arthur and the Minimoys) (2007) " The routine story and lack of real warmth make this a movie to endure with one's children, not to share with them." — Reel.com
Posted Dec 29, 2006
2/4 91% Letters from Iwo Jima (2006) " So much time is wasted on irrelevant material that the movie drags at a snail's pace, and even at 141 minutes, Letters never develops its ideas beyond the standard 'war is hell' clichés." — Reel.com
Posted Dec 20, 2006
2/4 7% Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj (Van Wilder 2) (2006) " Penn isn't quite as charming here as he was in Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, but he has a lot less to work with." — Reel.com
Posted Dec 1, 2006
2/4 36% The Abandoned (2007) " [Director Nacho] Cerdà's craftsmanship and his overall sense of seriousness keep The Abandoned from being a bad film, but it simply isn't very scary or involving. It just feels too familiar and dull." — Reel.com
Posted Nov 25, 2006
2/4 15% The Return (2006) " Asif Kapadia's The Return is a visually sumptuous but emotionally stillborn thriller that may be a bit too modest for its own good." — Reel.com
Posted Nov 11, 2006
2.5/4 56% Weirdsville (2007) " Moyle is as deft a craftsman as ever, utilizing the widescreen frame to create a number of elegant, vibrantly colorful images that give the film a bright, bubbly energy in spite of the violence at its core." — Reel.com
Posted Oct 5, 2007
2.5/4 72% Tekon Kinkurîto (Tekkonkinkreet) (2007) " Since the movie more or less abandons all pretense of naturalism somewhere around its midpoint, in the end the expressionistic frenzy of light, movement, and color that takes over is enough to make it worth seeing." — Reel.com
Posted Jul 13, 2007
2.5/4 25% Blind Dating (2007) " The fact that Blind Dating provides a relationship between two characters whom the audience desperately wants to see wind up together is ultimately all that matters." — Reel.com
Posted May 11, 2007
2.5/4 6% Nomad: The Warrior (2007) " In the American-release version of the picture, the emphasis on spectacle and the paring away of all but the most essential exposition ends up having the opposite of its intended effect." — Reel.com
Posted Mar 16, 2007
2.5/4 12% The Messengers (2007) " The Messengers is still worth seeing for the strength of its first half and for the consistently solid performances, but the sense of unrealized potential is tough to ignore." — Reel.com
Posted Feb 2, 2007
2.5/4 43% Funny Money (2006) " Perfectly serviceable middle of the road comedy." — Reel.com
Posted Jan 26, 2007
2.5/4 5% THR3E (2007) " Thr3e is an eccentric combination of horror film and religious morality play that isn't entirely successful on either level but gets by on the sheer professionalism of its makers." — Reel.com
Posted Jan 5, 2007
2.5/4 66% Man cheng jin dai huang jin jia (Curse of the Golden Flower) (2006) " The sheer technical brilliance of the battle sequences and martial arts showdowns is mind-blowing -- this is the kind of movie that's so visually dynamic that it's compelling even when we could care less about the people on screen." — Reel.com
Posted Dec 22, 2006
3/4 75% The Last Winter (2007) " In the end, the scariest thing about The Last Winter is how few of its ideas seem truly fantastic or implausible." — Reel.com
Posted Sep 21, 2007
3/4 27% Dragon Wars (D-War) (2007) " It's admittedly pretty dumb, but in the end its fierce commitment to its own goofy ideas is oddly admirable." — Reel.com
Posted Sep 15, 2007
3/4 49% Hatchet (2006) " Like its villain, its brute strength makes up for its relative lack of brains." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 25, 2007
3/4 67% Right at Your Door (2007) " Crosses our real-life national nightmares with a cleverly constructed thriller to create a movie that is smart, impeccably acted, and extremely unsettling." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 24, 2007
3/4 14% Skinwalkers (2007) " One of the year's more pleasant surprises." — Reel.com
Posted Aug 17, 2007
3/4 90% Rescue Dawn (2007) " Made up of moments that represent cinema at its best -- moments of pure sensation of the type that can't be expressed with the same degree of immediacy in any other art form." — Reel.com
Posted Jul 3, 2007
3/4 79% Ghosts of Cité Soleil (2006) " Consistently riveting thanks to the sense of sheer terror that infuses its best moments." — Reel.com
Posted Jun 29, 2007
3/4 69% Black Sheep (2006) " Delivers exactly what it promises: it's a stylish, thoroughly entertaining summer monster movie." — Reel.com
Posted Jun 22, 2007
3/4 —— Prison Of The Psychotic Damned (2007) " Williams's dialogue writing is often rather witty -- he's fully aware of some of the more ridiculous conventions of the genre, and he gives the characters exchanges in which they justify the plot contrivances in inventive, plausible ways." — Reel.com
Posted Jun 8, 2007
3/4 40% The Wendell Baker Story (2005) " That they've assembled a first-rate cast made up of veteran character actors and contemporary comedy stars to pursue this agenda makes The Wendell Baker Story all the more effective." — Reel.com
Posted May 19, 2007
3/4 35% The Last Time (2007) " It alternates between bleak cynicism and a genuinely romantic sensibility, and this unusual combination makes the movie a great vehicle for Keaton and Valletta, and a compelling drama for the audience." — Reel.com
Posted May 18, 2007
3/4 56% Civic Duty (2006) " A provocative, unsettling tale about a powerful nation on the defensive." — Reel.com
Posted May 4, 2007
3/4 68% The Treatment (2006) " An accessible piece of entertainment that you don't need to shut your brain off to enjoy." — Reel.com
Posted May 4, 2007
3/4 —— Totally Baked: A Pot-U-Mentary () " Educational, but it's also an enjoyably goofy comedy that will appeal to fans of Mad TV and Saturday Night Live." — Reel.com
Posted Apr 20, 2007
3/4 48% Lonely Hearts (2006) " Their amorality isn't presented in a conventional manner; it's depicted in an unremarkable, matter-of-fact style that makes it all the more realistic -- and all the more unsettling." — Reel.com
Posted Apr 13, 2007
3/4 58% First Snow (2007) " With its quiet, unassuming style and brooding intelligence, First Snow isn't the kind of movie that announces itself, but it's well worth seeking out, especially for moviegoers who complain that 'they' don't make movies for grown-ups anymore." — Reel.com
Posted Mar 23, 2007
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