|
1/6
|
25%
|
Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience (2009) |
"
The songs wash over in waves of such turgid mediocrity that by the end you're praying for it to stop. Thankfully, after 76 minutes, it does - and all is well again."
—
Time Out
Posted May 29, 2009
|
|
1/6
|
12%
|
Pink Panther 2 (2009) |
"
Martin fumbles it from the off. And that, in a nutshell, is reason enough to avoid this as one might any other calamity."
—
Time Out
Posted Feb 12, 2009
|
|
1/6
|
2%
|
Disaster Movie (2008) |
"
The result is a series of extraneous, deplorably unfunny scenes and sketches stitched together in completely haphazard fashion."
—
Time Out
Posted Sep 5, 2008
|
|
1/6
|
13%
|
College Road Trip (2008) |
"
Even with a brief running time, 'College Road Trip' is an ordeal that even its target audience will find dispiritingly lame."
—
Time Out
Posted Aug 22, 2008
|
|
1/5
|
13%
|
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011) |
"
To be fair, this franchise was never intended to appeal to anyone over six. But you do wonder how the filmmakers still managed to contrive something so unfunny and trite."
—
Time Out
Posted Dec 13, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
53%
|
Diary of a Wimpy Kid (2010) |
—
Time Out
Posted Nov 16, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
14%
|
Zookeeper (2011) |
"
Funniest moments? The outtakes during the closing credits. I rest my case."
—
Time Out
Posted Jul 27, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
5%
|
Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son (2011) |
"
Quite how this flaccid, one-joke crime-comedy franchise even got off the ground is a mystery."
—
Time Out
Posted Feb 16, 2011
|
|
1/5
|
14%
|
Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore (2010) |
"
The script suggests it was developed on the hoof; the CGI is low grade stuff; and the human performances are loathsome."
—
Time Out
Posted Aug 5, 2010
|
|
1/5
|
21%
|
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009) |
"
What we're offered is a succession of lifeless scenes punctuated by pratfalls that only a handful of kids in the audience found funny. Next."
—
Time Out
Posted Dec 18, 2009
|
|
1/5
|
14%
|
Hitman (2007) |
"
There's a cool opening credits sequence, but beyond that 'Hitman' doesn't make much sense, is encumbered by clunky dialogue, some amateurish performances and clichéd set-pieces we've seen umpteen times before."
—
Time Out
Posted Nov 29, 2007
|
|
|
6%
|
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997) |
"
It's a toss up which aspect of this drivel is worst."
—
Time Out
Posted Feb 27, 2009
|
|
|
53%
|
Halloween H2O (1998) |
"
While Carpenter's film was all about economy and a skilful use of empty space, Miner's busy compositions have a cluttered feel that is echoed by superfluous orchestral music."
—
Time Out
Posted Aug 16, 2007
|
|
|
15%
|
Wild Hogs (2007) |
"
Petrol-headed fifty-somethings into Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Allman Brothers will probably relate to some of the funnier scenes. The rest, including pre-teens, are advised to avoid it like el plago."
—
Time Out
Posted Apr 12, 2007
|
|
|
66%
|
Meet the Robinsons (2007) |
"
The first 20 minutes of this competently animated kids' adventure are entertaining enough. But thereafter, the plot fractures, the pace goes into overdrive and the jokes wear thin."
—
Time Out
Posted Mar 31, 2007
|
|
|
50%
|
Sign of the Pagan (1954) |
"
An immensely interesting though finally unsuccessful film."
—
Time Out
Posted Mar 24, 2007
|
|
|
21%
|
Arthur and the Invisibles (Arthur and the Minimoys) (2007) |
"
Luc Besson's half-baked live-action/animated fantasy looks like it was invented on the hoof: it's erratically plotted, poorly animated, overly derivative and too insufferably cute to interest anyone above undemanding toddler age."
—
Time Out
Posted Jan 25, 2007
|
|
|
30%
|
Unaccompanied Minors (2006) |
"
Irresponsible content notwithstanding, it's the low standard of filmmaking that really defies belief."
—
Time Out
Posted Dec 30, 2006
|
|
|
44%
|
Night at the Museum (2006) |
"
... an aimless and riotous mess."
—
Time Out
Posted Dec 30, 2006
|
|
|
15%
|
The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006) |
"
You've got to hand it to director Michael Lembeck... he's succeeded in persuading studio bosses to let him make not one but two sequels from premises that were dead in the water from the word go."
—
Time Out
Posted Nov 23, 2006
|
|
|
23%
|
Barnyard: The Original Party Animals (2006) |
"
Loud, raucous and dispiritingly unfunny."
—
Time Out
Posted Oct 19, 2006
|
|
|
33%
|
Stormbreaker (Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker) (2006) |
"
Of the dressed-to-thrill cast, only [Alex] Pettyfer disappoints; he just looks and sounds too bland to be a teen hero. But I'll leave that for the kids to decide."
—
Time Out
Posted Jul 20, 2006
|
|
|
12%
|
The Mighty Ducks (1992) |
"
Very lame ice-hockey flick."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
12%
|
Sphere (1998) |
"
Three major stars being involved, it all wraps up happily but implausibly."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
80%
|
The Green Mile (1999) |
"
The supernatural elements carry an undeniable emotional charge, but the solution to the underlying murder mystery is disappointingly tidy and trite."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
30%
|
The Saint (1997) |
"
Eminently forgettable."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
——
|
So Fine (1981) |
"
On the long list of comedy ideas screenwriters should never have had, this film must rank high."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
12%
|
Speechless (1994) |
"
Mugging to an unfunny script, Keaton and Davis are no Tracy and Hepburn, and the funereal pace doesn't help."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
34%
|
Resident Evil (2002) |
"
Hats off, however, to the production team for the set designs and one very imaginative death-by-laser sequence. The rest is a derivative, tedious mess."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
22%
|
Mr. Deeds (2002) |
"
The star and his numbskull cronies piss on Capra's grave with acrid insincerity."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
16%
|
Howard the Duck (1986) |
"
[An] aimless movie."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
83%
|
Magic (1978) |
"
A hammed-up version of the old chestnut about the ventriloquist who is 'taken over' by his dummy, clumsily adapted by William Goldman from his own novel."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
63%
|
The Goonies (1985) |
"
While the pre-pubescents continually scream, their doting parents prove equally odious in a finale of astounding sentimentality."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
80%
|
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) |
"
This time it ends with the underdogs together. Oddly enough, it's this conclusion that feels phony, seeing as Stoltz has spent the last 80 minutes arranging his dream date with Lea."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
92%
|
Star Trek - First Contact (1996) |
"
This makes little concession to non-initiates."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
30%
|
Screamers (1996) |
"
The design and effects teams have lent scale and impact to the futuristic locations and sets. If only Duguay's flashy, aimless direction had succeeded in filling these barren wastes and antiseptic interiors with something resembling human life."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
19%
|
Thomas and the Magic Railroad (2000) |
"
If all this sounds convoluted, well, it's a toddlers' film and anything goes."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
67%
|
Sleepy Hollow (1999) |
"
For about an hour it's a fine, ghoulish carnival sideshow, and that has its charms, but there's a thin desperation about the climax."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
12%
|
My Favorite Martian (1999) |
"
Dire."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
79%
|
Starman (1984) |
"
The best special effects are in the first five minutes. Thereafter, it's all rather predictable."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
31%
|
Good Burger (1997) |
"
Few people can be so big-hearted as to tolerate Ed's agonizing brand of pedantic humour."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
80%
|
Primary Colors (1998) |
"
As satire, it's toothless and indulgent; as drama of conscience, it's not a patch on real life..."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
35%
|
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006) |
"
True, it tries to be tongue-in-cheek, but really it's just cheek."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
54%
|
Spriggan (2001) |
"
Characterisation is regulation thin, plotting largely nonsensical, 'camerawork' and effects increasingly pyrotechnical until an amazing final light show inside the Ark."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
53%
|
The Magic Christian (1970) |
"
The result is a variety concert of a film in which most of the acts/jokes fall flat."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
2%
|
Half Past Dead (2002) |
"
Sometimes, when you've just wasted a tenner and a perfectly good evening watching another dumb, gratuitously gun-filled, hackneyed, nonsensical action picture, don't you wish you were as thick, lazy and easily pleased as Hollywood wants you to be?"
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
93%
|
Saving Private Ryan (1998) |
"
Why did Spielberg make it? He wants us to imagine we can feel the terror of being there, but does that make us any wiser about this or any other conflict? Probably not."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
49%
|
Picture Perfect (1997) |
"
[Aniston] has the rare gift of getting you to root for her in the most trying of circumstances, a quality that will stand her in good stead when she progresses to better material."
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
83%
|
Scrooge (A Christmas Carol) (1951) |
"
You have what Scrooge himself might call 'Ho-hum-bug.'"
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
|
|
86%
|
Grand Hotel (1932) |
"
The Nashville of its day, Grand Hotel's reputation has outgrown its actual quality"
—
Time Out
Posted Jun 24, 2006
|
65%
——
97%
