ROTTEN TOMATOES: Michael Elliott

Official Websites:
Movie Parables

MICHAEL ELLIOTT

""The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist." (The Usual Suspects)"

Agrees with the Tomatometer 73% of the time.

Biography: Since 1998, Michael Elliott has been reviewing films from a unique perspective. Using a combination of spiritual insight and film appreciation, Mr. Elliott's reviews not only critique the artistic elements of a film, they also use that film as an illustration of the eternal truths which God has made known to us through His Word. Graduating from college with a theater arts degree, he has continued to follow the movie industry as this exciting art form progressed from trend to trend. In the early 1990’s, he began what was to evolve into a passion for biblical research. From his steadfast belief that the Bible, as the Will of God in written form, can and should be applied to our daily living, Movie Parables was devised. Mr. Elliott's reviews have been published or quoted by organizations or publications such as The Baptist Messenger, The Minneapolis Christian Chronicle, Crosswalk.com, Christianity Today, and The Canyon News among others. His reviews have also been accepted within the secular film community. He is a member of The Online Film Critics Society and his reviews often appear alongside secular reviewers at Rotten Tomatoes, and The Movie Review Query Engine. Mr. Elliott lives in Orlando, Florida with his wife. You may contact him by writing to the following address: Movie Parables 722 E Amelia St Orlando, FL 32803 or via e-mail:ccritic@bellsouth.net

Publications: Christian Spotlight on the Movies, Movie Parables

Total Reviews: 1351
Total QuickRatings: 21

Location: Orlando, FL

WORST REVIEWED FILMS

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Rating	T-Meter	Title \| Year	Add Date (default)

Rotten 0/4	Rotten 48%	Jackass: The Movie (2002)	" If nothing else, the title is an example of truth in advertising (except it should be plural)." — Movie Parables Posted Oct 27, 2002
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 14%	Scary Movie 2 (2001)	" We can only pray that this time around, the box office will be poor enough to discourage a Scary Movie III." — Movie Parables Posted Jul 3, 2001
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 11%	Freddy Got Fingered (2001)	" Not content with pushing the envelope of taste, Green decides to simply take a bulldozer to the whole post office. " — Movie Parables Posted Apr 17, 2001
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 45%	The Cell (2000)	" Of all the places to visit, there is nothing quite as unappealing as a trip into the mind of a seriously sick serial killer." — Movie Parables Posted Feb 14, 2001
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 74%	Quills (2000)	" No matter how well-crafted, well-acted, or well-written a script may be, one cannot completely ignore the fact that the subject matter is odious." — Movie Parables Posted Feb 7, 2001
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 82%	The War Zone (1999)	" This is one depressing film and it will leave its mark on those who choose to watch it." — Movie Parables Posted Oct 29, 2003
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 89%	Boys Don't Cry (1999)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Mar 21, 2001
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 47%	Cruel Intentions (1999)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 80%	South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 80%	Fight Club (1999)	" As artistically fascinating as the movie may be, the spiritual sickness that it depicts is, at the very least, distasteful." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Fresh 97%	All About My Mother (1999)	" The film provides strong roles for a number of actresses who make full use of them." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 38%	The Big Hit (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 50%	The Object Of My Affection (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 48%	Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 48%	Small Soldiers (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 17%	Dirty Work (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten 0/4	Rotten 21%	Practical Magic (1998)	Click here to read article — Movie Parables Posted Jan 1, 2000
Rotten .5/4	Rotten 23%	Torque (2004)	" *Who knew that it would be possible to "dumb down" 2 Fast 2 Furious?" — Movie Parables* Posted Jan 14, 2004
Rotten .5/4	Rotten 0%	Pinocchio (2002)	" Once the 50 year old Benigni appears as the title character, we find ourselves longing for the block of wood to come back." — Movie Parables Posted Dec 27, 2002
Rotten .5/4	Rotten 19%	National Lampoon's Van Wilder (2002)	" If you have something better to do, like re-grout the shower tiles, opt for the grout." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 3, 2002
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 26%	Waist Deep (2006)	" I don't know what the characters/actors of Waist Deep are waist deep in - but it sure doesn't smell like petunias." — Movie Parables Posted Jun 25, 2006
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 40%	Running Scared (2006)	" Are the cliches intentionally designed to be funny or is this just laughably bad? If you have to ask... it's the latter." — Movie Parables Posted Feb 23, 2006
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 16%	Underworld: Evolution (2006)	" Correct me if I am wrong but doesn't the word evolution suggest that something must grow or develop into something else?" — Movie Parables Posted Jan 23, 2006
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 14%	The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)	" As enjoyable as a flat tire and moves along about as smoothly." — Movie Parables Posted Aug 13, 2005
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 10%	Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005)	" There's no saving this piece of Euro-trash." — Movie Parables Posted Aug 13, 2005
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 10%	Elektra (2005)	" She may have returned from the dead but this Elektra has little life in it." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 13, 2005
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 56%	Ocean's Twelve (2004)	" An over-padded, sleep-inducing bore." — Movie Parables Posted Dec 9, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 16%	Alexander (2004)	" A flaw-filled epic treatment that may do more to destroy the conqueror's legend than all the armies he once opposed." — Movie Parables Posted Nov 24, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Fresh 78%	Team America: World Police (2004)	" Their sole point seems to be... to rub their so-called cleverness in the face of the MPAA." — Movie Parables Posted Oct 14, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 0%	Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 (2004)	" Needs less genius in front of the camera and more behind it." — Movie Parables Posted Aug 28, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 14%	Without A Paddle (2004)	" Not only is it missing an oar, there's a huge leak in this boat." — Movie Parables Posted Aug 19, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Fresh 73%	Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle (2004)	" When Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, they offer no good reason for us to accompany them." — Movie Parables Posted Jul 29, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 26%	The Stepford Wives (2004)	" "Perfect doesn't work." I would have settled for competent." — Movie Parables Posted Jun 12, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 30%	Chronicles of Riddick (2004)	" Writers demonstrating such incredible lack of imagination and inventiveness should not be working in the realm of science fiction." — Movie Parables Posted Jun 11, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 19%	Soul Plane (2004)	" Instead of laughing with the actors, I found myself feeling sorry for them." — Movie Parables Posted May 26, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 4%	The Whole Ten Yards (2004)	" Proof that, sometimes, going the extra yard can be a big mistake." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 8, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 6%	Johnson Family Vacation (2004)	" [Cedric the Entertainer] deserves better. For that matter, so do we." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 6, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 16%	The Big Bounce (2004)	" Bounce? This film barely moves." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 28, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 4%	My Baby's Daddy (2004)	" Segments of this film... are totally "cringe-worthy." No directorial slight of hand... helps to assuage the discomfort these scenes evoke." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 9, 2004
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 34%	In the Cut (2003)	" In The Cut is a gruesome murder mystery awash in sexuality, nudity, profanity, graphic violence, and more red herrings than can be found at the local fish market." — Movie Parables Posted Oct 30, 2003
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 37%	Scary Movie 3 (2003)	" Even though it is an improvement over the other Scary Movies, it remains a silly, silly film where the attempts at comedy miss as often as they hit." — Movie Parables Posted Oct 29, 2003
Rotten 1/4	Fresh 69%	Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)	" A confusing bore of a movie." — Movie Parables Posted Sep 17, 2003
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 43%	DysFunKtional Family (2003)	" The laughs may come, though not as frequently nor as raucously as the on screen audience would lead us to believe." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 3, 2003
Rotten 1/4	Fresh 72%	Auto Focus (2002)	" A film involving characters about whom we don't care performing acts which we don't care to see." — Movie Parables Posted Nov 3, 2002
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 25%	The Sweetest Thing (2002)	" To be oblivious to the existence of this film would be very sweet indeed." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 11, 2002
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 10%	Slackers (2002)	" [The film's] taste for "shock humor" will wear thin on all but those weaned on the comedy of Tom Green and the Farrelly Brothers." — Movie Parables Posted Jan 31, 2002
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 28%	Not Another Teen Movie (2001)	" While there are a few amusing details... these moments are few and sandwiched between large sections of tedium and twaddle." — Movie Parables Posted Dec 14, 2001
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 12%	Original Sin (2001)	" Original Sin is hardly original and the sin is one of omission. The filmmakers have omitted logic and any semblance of rational thought or motivation." — Movie Parables Posted Aug 4, 2001
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 19%	Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001)	" Highly anticipated, highly disappointing, and patently ridiculous." — Movie Parables Posted Jun 14, 2001
Rotten 1/4	Rotten 33%	Just Visiting (2001)	" Even with so much borrowed from the original, something was definitely lost in the translation." — Movie Parables Posted Apr 12, 2001

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4/4	Pride and PrejudiceOffsite
3.5/4	Harry Potter and the Goblet of FireOffsite
3/4	King KongOffsite
2.5/4	The Legend of ZorroOffsite
2/4	Yours, Mine, & OursOffsite
1.5/4	Just FriendsOffsite
1/4	Underworld: EvolutionOffsite

4/4	RatatouilleOffsite
4/4	Amazing GraceOffsite
4/4	World Trade CenterOffsite
4/4	Walk the LineOffsite
4/4	Pride and PrejudiceOffsite
4/4	Cinderella ManOffsite
4/4	Finding NeverlandOffsite
4/4	The Polar ExpressOffsite
4/4	HeroOffsite
4/4	Riding GiantsOffsite

MICHAEL ELLIOTT

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