Critics » Erik Childress » Rotten
Erik Childress

Erik Childress

""I would give anything if you were two people, so I can call up the one who's my friend and tell her about the one that I like SO much." - Albert Brooks, Broadcast News "We...are going...to DIE!!!" Harrison Ford, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom"

Agrees with the Tomatometer 71% of the time.

Biography:
Erik started reviewing films as a frequent guest on the Jonathon Brandmeier Radio Showgram (105.9 FM in Chicago / 97.1 FM in LA) back in 1998 through 2001, which led to a mailing list over the Internet of his reviews to listeners of the radio show. Known as "Erik the Movieman", these appearances also attracted the attention of another Chicago radio show host, Nick Digilio (WGN 720 AM in Chicago, 11-3 AM Fri, 1-4 AM Sat, 12-2 AM Sun) where he's now become a regular guest on his Sunday night show to finish up the movie discussion. He is also on to discuss impending awards, top ten lists, new articles, etc...) Erik was also heard on Buzz Kilman & Wendy Snyder's midday show in Chicago (105.9 FM WCKG, 11-2 PM Mon-Fri) from Jan 2001-Mar 2002. Erik writes for eFilmCritic.com and has been a member of the Online Film Critics Society since February 2000 and also became the first online writer inducted into the Chicago Film Critics Association alongside such names as Roger Ebert, Michael Wilmington and Dann Gire.
Favorites:
Back to the Future, JFK, the Star Wars films, the Indiana Jones films, E.T., pretty much anything directed by Steven Spielberg, Aliens, Broadcast News, Die Hard, Flash Gordon (1980) (Hey - I was a kid!)
Publications:
Cinematical , eFilmCritic.com , Hollywood Bitchslap
Critics' Group:
Chicago Film Critics Association, Online Film Critics Society
Total Reviews:
1168
Total QuickRatings:
23
Location:
Elk Grove Village, IL (Chicago)

Worst Reviewed Films

Showing 1 - 50 of 1166
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
0/4 0% Swinging With The Finkels (2011) " If you make it to the so-called happy ending, think aloud if Swinging with the Finkels would have lived up to its name better if the titular couple ended their relationship on the business side of a noose." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Aug 26, 2011
0/4 25% The Change-Up (2011) " A screenplay that should equally insult every single AND married man who witnesses this catastrophe. They say you have to hit rock bottom before you can find clarity. Well, after their Hangover, Lucas & Moore certainly did it with The Change-Up." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Aug 5, 2011
0/4 35% The Hangover Part II (2011) " The equivalent of a drunk college student waking up the morning their book report is due and desperately trying to remember what they saw in the crappy movie version." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 25, 2011
0/4 19% Just Go with It (2011) " This film is a real piece of Devlin." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 11, 2011
0/4 37% Burlesque (2010) " The movie is an affront to all things screenwriting; a package of empty envelopes at the cliche factory that actually should have every cliche filing a class action lawsuit to stop the film from using their likeness." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Nov 25, 2010
0/4 35% Lottery Ticket (2010) " A film so devoid of direction, so offensive in its storytelling and so wholly ignorant to its own philosophy, you would swear it was made by Madea Perry." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Aug 20, 2010
0/4 15% A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) " After the incompetence exuded by Samuel Bayer here, I feel confident in saying it is time to put his feature film career to sleep for good." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Apr 29, 2010
0/4 21% I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell (2009) " May be the first film from the perspective of a Van Wilder villain and by the time this vile, amateurish and supposed true story is over, you may feel as if you've just spent 100 minutes looking through Michael Myers' first mask." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 24, 2009
0/4 6% All About Steve (2009) " I suspect that this is a film that speaks to those who believe Every Breath You Take is a love song." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 4, 2009
0/4 14% I Love You Beth Cooper (2009) " A film so badly executed that you have to wonder if Larry Doyle (who serves as screenwriter) ever read his own book, let alone wrote it." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jul 9, 2009
0/4 20% Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) " This is the single worst film to be released thus far in the summer of 2009 and that's a whole helluva pile of bad to overcome in achieving that title." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jun 24, 2009
0/4 22% Fired Up (2009) " The Maxim revolution kicks off with Fired Up and the fact that even the now Hammond-less skin mag's name is nowhere to be found on the title, should tell you that even they are trying to maintain some dignity." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 19, 2009
0/4 44% Soul Men (2008) " If the Weinsteins had any soul themselves they would take this film and bury it along with every other film they seem to these days instead of trying to cash it in as some misbegotten tribute to Bernie Mac's legacy." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Nov 6, 2008
0/4 36% The Lucky Ones (2008) " With one head-gnawing plot contrivance after another, it may think it's the wacky Iraq version of Easy Rider but is more like this year's Around the Bend or Diamonds." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 25, 2008
0/4 18% The Happening (2008) " The greatest excuse yet to get that anti-M. Night petition started. The last thing we want is a future of Shyamalan films with the knowledge that we all could have done something sooner." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jun 13, 2008
0/4 50% Sex and the City (2008) " Having the story of Cinderella play a significant role in the feature introduces the deadpan irony that this version is told through the eyes of the stepsisters like a big screen version of Wicked only without the happy ending." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 29, 2008
0/4 27% What Happens in Vegas (2008) " A distinctly awful cover version of 'I Want A New Drug' plays on the soundtrack and is a direct thought to the audience who is going to need something a lot stronger to make it through this unrelentless excuse for a romantic comedy." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 8, 2008
0/4 40% The Bucket List (2007) " Justin Zackham's screenplay should be the first to be banned from writing classes everywhere let alone hospitals and support groups." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Dec 24, 2007
0/4 9% I Know Who Killed Me (2007) " Imagine the worst possible idea for a Parent Trap sequel that manages to combine elements of Stigmata, Dune, The Empire Strikes Back, The Corsican Brothers and Blue Man Group." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jul 27, 2007
0/4 14% I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (2007) " Chuck & Larry is such an abysmal stab at comedy on every conceivable level that I wish there was a hate group we could join to protest it." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jul 19, 2007
0/4 27% Evening (2007) " Easily the most insufferable film experience in a year that has already given us Wild Hogs, The Hills Have Eyes 2 and Premonition." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jun 28, 2007
0/4 5% Broken Bridges (2006) " It would have served Keith better to pick a project that didn't accentuate a character who stumbles around an aimless plot with the same confusion of Bruce Banner coming down from one of his 'smash' moods." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 8, 2006
0/4 61% The New World (2005) " If it were any more obtuse, The New World would be a flipbook where the moving picture was obscured by a thumb drawn over the stick figures." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Dec 22, 2005
0/4 6% Supercross (2005) " If my Johnson Rod had ink it could craft a picture flipbook better than this." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Aug 16, 2005
0/4 52% Suspended Animation (2001) " The film is like vomiting and then expecting your shoes to come out of your mouth. Neither is a pleasant experience, but on some level it has to be seen to be believed." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Oct 30, 2003
0/4 23% Bad Boys II (2003) " Seeing Bad Boys II at the critic's screening was like being in the audience watching Springtime for Hitler on opening night; a torrential downpour of horrific detestation, then laughter so thick at how insanely preposterous it all gets." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jul 17, 2003
0/4 17% House of 1000 Corpses (2003) " Surely the rocker, an incredible admirer of horror films, realized his final product wasn't above the standards of the kind of straight-to-video shlock that even Elvira or Sybil Danning would be ashamed to present." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Apr 10, 2003
0/4 34% Bringing Down The House (2003) " I'm ashamed that this movie exists, that people got paid for it and that someone out there will eventually add it to their DVD collection." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Mar 6, 2003
0/4 37% Sweet Home Alabama (2002) " This is one of the most painful, loathesomey, unfunny big studio, mainstream star vehicle comedies I've had to sit through in a long time." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 26, 2002
0/4 58% A Knight's Tale (2001) " A Knight's Tale is a boil on the festering malignant state of the cinema and it should be lanced immediately." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 7, 2001
0/4 33% Just Visiting (2001) " Just Visiting is like going out to eat, being handed the check first and then told to leave with a rampant case of incurable indigestion." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Apr 5, 2001
0.5/4 11% Gone (2012) " Imagine Tyler Perry directing the lamest remake of Kiss the Girls imaginable and you can get a sense of how flat-out awful the storytelling and character development is in this one." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 24, 2012
0.5/4 11% Red Riding Hood (2011) " The wolf attacks, few and far, are roughly the equivalent of a bedtime story that puts the adult to sleep while the six year-old gives the finger to the monster under the bed for looking so fake." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Mar 10, 2011
0.5/4 32% I Am Number Four (2011) " I Am Number Four indeed. Cause this is a movie that just took two gigantic dumps on my brain." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 18, 2011
0.5/4 —— Vampire () " Vampire is an agonizing bore, traipsing along on the assumption that just because it is trying to be different, that does not make it special." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 3, 2011
0.5/4 15% Sex and the City 2 (2010) " A miscalculation of feminine power so extreme that our country's threat level should immediately be raised." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 27, 2010
0.5/4 18% Valentine's Day (2010) " To compare Valentine's Day to Richard Curtis' wonderfully funny and moving examination of realized crushes and heartbreak, Love Actually, is like offering you a choice between a date with Lloyd Dobler or a Peterson. Scott or Drew, take your pick." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 12, 2010
0.5/4 13% The Ugly Truth (2009) " While it may have been directed by a man, albeit one with all the talent of a water bra, it's screenplay is credited to three women who have managed to make Defending the Caveman seem like the height of exposing our Martian tendencies." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jul 24, 2009
0.5/4 78% The Hangover (2009) " With The Hangover Todd Phillips has officially become the Uwe Boll of comedy." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Jun 5, 2009
0.5/4 25% Friday the 13th (2009) " A miserable failure that maintains no attempt to reimagine the villain, the cliches, or the bloody kills and it becomes a depressing experience that offers zero enjoyment and even less fright." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 12, 2009
0.5/4 43% Death Race (2008) " We're in for a bumpy ride on Anderson's Bi-polar express where the line between homage and ripoff is never as blurry as his action sequences. His Ben-Hur chariot race would have needed nothing more than one set of horses, a couple human heads and a wheel." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Aug 21, 2008
0.5/4 38% Speed Racer (2008) " Speed Racer devolves into one of the most painfully ill-conceived borefests to ever grace a summer movie season and an easy candidate of one of 2008's worst films." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted May 8, 2008
0.5/4 3% Deal (2008) " Deal has to take the title of the worst film ever about the game and that includes the how-to videos with Joan Rivers impersonators you see in your Vegas hotel room." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Apr 24, 2008
0.5/4 14% Hitman (2007) " If there is someone out there willing to support Hitman and who believes that it conforms to the basic attributes of a cinematic experience, then there is something wrong with you." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Nov 20, 2007
0.5/4 37% Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (2007) " A tediously unimaginative short story run amok that will somehow put kids to sleep who are already sleeping and maybe wake up adults who were overly harsh on Barry Levinson for Toys." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Nov 15, 2007
0.5/4 53% Across the Universe (2007) " You could make the same movie using the music of Huey Lewis. And most likely a less embarrassing one." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Sep 20, 2007
0.5/4 15% Wild Hogs (2007) " I can imagine Albert Brooks sitting in a theater watching this garbage and praying that it actually ends like Easy Rider." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Mar 1, 2007
0.5/4 18% Chapter 27 (2007) " Will likely make its own mark on history as the single most relentlessly self-conscious vanity project to ever be conceived." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Feb 7, 2007
0.5/4 30% Running With Scissors (2006) " The worst kind of cinematic parable; a self-aware mixture of quirk and depression populated by some of the most oppressively infuriating characters imaginable." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Oct 26, 2006
0.5/4 21% Man of the Year (2006) " So haphazardly fails to recognize the ironies of its own failings that it unwittingly makes George W. Bush funnier...when he's TRYING to be funny." — eFilmCritic.com
Posted Oct 12, 2006
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