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Critics / Armond White / Movies
Armond White

    ARMOND WHITE

    Agrees with the Tomatometer 51% of the time.

    Publications: New York Press, NPR's Fresh Air

    Critics' Group: New York Film Critics Circle, New York Film Critics Online

    Total Reviews: 340

    MOVIE REVIEWS ONLY

    • All
    • Movies
    • Fresh
    • Rotten
    • Other
    • Unquoted
    Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date (default)

    Rotten

    Fresh
    88%

    The White Ribbon (2009)

    " Think Children of the Damned, Children of the Corn, Children of Men. Think childishly in order to believe that Haneke's ripoffs of Carl Dreyer atmosphere and Ingmar Bergman sexual hysteria are at all original." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 30, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    67%

    Police, Adjective (2009)

    " Godard and Makavejev used to do this kind of thing as a subversive joke, but here it’s literal-minded didacticism, impressive only to those who don’t know how exciting good political cinema can be." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 30, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    50%

    It's Complicated (2009)

    " Each “adorable” yet unreal scene is more offensive than the last." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 22, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    70%

    Sherlock Holmes (2009)

    " So grim and unappealing it sours the movie-watching experience." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 22, 2009

    Fresh

    Rotten
    55%

    Ricky (2009)

    " In Ozon’s distinctively eccentric style, Ricky applies modern skepticism to the prospect of parthenogenesis (based on an American short story by Rose Tremain), then deepens the concept." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 22, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    83%

    Avatar (2009)

    " The corniest movie ever made about the white man's need to lose his identity and assuage racial, political, sexual and historical guilt." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 15, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    40%

    The Lovely Bones (2009)

    " Slipping past Sebold’s quondam feminist protest (briefly glimpsing Germaine Greer’s The Female Eunuch, for example), Jackson goes to the edge of lurid sentimentality." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 9, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    76%

    Invictus (2009)

    " Eastwood bungles his subject." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 9, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    82%

    A Single Man (2009)

    " It is the year’s most subtle movie acting and the finest performance of Firth’s career." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 9, 2009

    Fresh

    Rotten
    57%

    Brothers (2009)

    " Sheridan declines the dissociative artiness and blame that hipster filmmakers use to exempt themselves from today’s wars." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 9, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    89%

    Up in the Air (2009)

    " Only seriously deluded people could enjoy Reitman’s funny-sad whiplash. He’s playing that same Hollywood game: keeping people ignorant of political economy." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 2, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    46%

    Everybody's Fine (2009)

    " De Niro brings jolts of depth and feeling to a treacly premise. An amazing flashback scene pits a recalcitrant De Niro against a group of needy child actors who cannot match his profundity." — New York Press

    Posted Dec 2, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    72%

    The Road (2009)

    " Great junk like Resident Evil and passable schlock like 28 Weeks Later have more skill and integrity. Why would anyone want to make -- or watch -- this Hillcoat/McCarthy desolation except to feel fashionably cynical?" — New York Press

    Posted Nov 29, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    83%

    The Princess and the Frog (2009)

    " Its hypocrisy is hidden inside a disingenuous promotional campaign that suggests change has come to Disney’s animated white house." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 29, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    28%

    The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)

    " Bella’s confusion about the mystery of boys, adrenaline and testosterone matches her confusion about her soul. For Weitz, it’s all just F/X." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 24, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    82%

    Broken Embraces (2009)

    " Almodóvar lost his nerve when he acquired expensive technique. Inspired by Buñuel and De Palma, he used to match them. Now, his once underground satires are just expensive tearjerkers." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 19, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    85%

    Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans (2009)

    " Cage’s receding hairline and hunchback performance evokes Conrad Veidt -- a Klaus Kinski-like maniac -- because this is, in fact, a German Expressionist horror film and comedy." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 19, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    72%

    The Blind Side (2009)

    " All Bullock’s films promote an edifying sense of human experience -- she has an instinct for what people like to see -- and that gift makes The Blind Side the perfect, God-sent antidote to Precious." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 18, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    44%

    The Box (2009)

    " Kelly, king of dumbed-down nihilism, takes a short Twilight Zone TV episode, “Button, Button,” and extends it unendurably..." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 18, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    39%

    2012 (2009)

    " 2012’s narrative is super-banal and so are its special effects." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 11, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    93%

    Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)

    " Fantastic Mr. Fox renews one’s sense of animation’s possibilities." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 11, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    90%

    The Messenger (2009)

    " So bungled up with fashionable ambivalence about the Iraq War that every single behavioral detail is not just prejudicial but wrong." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 11, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    55%

    Disney's A Christmas Carol (2009)

    " Zemeckis' latest motion-capture CGI project capsizes Dickens' narrative power simply because the faces of the human simulacra are so utterly inexpressive and ugly." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 4, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    92%

    Precious: Based on the Novel PUSH by Sapphire (2009)

    " Winfrey, Perry and Daniels make an unholy triumvirate. They come together at some intersection of race exploitation and opportunism." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 4, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    54%

    The Men Who Stare at Goats (2009)

    " It’s smugness -- unleavened by wit -- that makes Goats so offensive." — New York Press

    Posted Nov 4, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    80%

    Michael Jackson's This Is It (2009)

    " Spielberg’s failure to engage Jackson on a movie-musical project (Peter Pan or Earth Song or Childhood) deprived the world of a possible Minnelli-level masterpiece." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 29, 2009

    Fresh

    Rotten
    16%

    Gentlemen Broncos (2009)

    " This is personal filmmaking, surveying the private emotions that generally embarrass people or make us feel out of step -- a daring proposition in an era that frantically insists upon marketable conformity." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 28, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    50%

    Antichrist (2009)

    " The quasi-religious title is misleading provocation; Antichrist is really anti-cinema." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 22, 2009

    Fresh

    Rotten
    25%

    Motherhood (2009)

    " Revealing the contradictions of this postfeminist age, Motherhood is good enough to recall Up the Sandbox, the elegant and eccentric 1972 response to feminism, race, class and media..." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 22, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    73%

    Where the Wild Things Are (2009)

    " The most daring kid’s-movie adaptation since Altman’s still-avant-garde Popeye from 1980." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 14, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    78%

    Bronson (2009)

    " Hardy’s portrayal is more than a real-life impersonation of Bronson; it realizes the Stunt Movie opportunity to present an actor’s thoroughly romantic admiration of force." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 7, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    94%

    An Education (2009)

    " The plot’s a cynical/sentimental rip-off of Flaubert’s novel Sentimental Education, yet full of commercial calculation -- including Scherfig’s romantic view of the Paris assignation." — New York Press

    Posted Oct 7, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    87%

    A Serious Man (2009)

    " A Serious Man rejects the bland Jewishness of Judd Apatow films; it’s similar to the black filmmakers’ project in Next Day Air, in which social stereotypes get burlesqued, yet are used to reveal an essentially moral exercise." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 30, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    57%

    The Invention of Lying (2009)

    " Gervais’ ridicule proves his lack of sophistication. Not only the most brutally photographed movie of the year, The Invention of Lying is so foully directed and carelessly acted it ultimately proves disingenuous." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 30, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    77%

    The Informant! (2009)

    " There’s no humanity to relate to, no wit to laugh at, only chuckling at one’s own sense of superiority -- if you can afford it." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 23, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    75%

    Capitalism: A Love Story (2009)

    " Moore’s ambush-and-blame methods are bad journalism. His lack of moral, political context is as questionable as ever." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 23, 2009

    Fresh

    Rotten
    31%

    Irene in Time (2009)

    " Against this Judd Apatow era, Jaglom’s exploratory filmmaking requires a personal response unhindered by TV formula. His semi-improvised vignettes go in unexpected places, often profoundly emotional directions..." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 23, 2009

    Fresh

    N/A

    Rage (2009)

    " Eschewing the lazy carelessness of so many misguided digital enthusiasts, Potter’s rigor becomes a refreshing reminder of true cinematic values." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 23, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    44%

    Jennifer's Body (2009)

    " Vanessa Hudgens and Alyson Michalka played more complex and affecting versions of these roles in Bandslam -- and neither was embarrassed with the name Needy." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 23, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    95%

    35 Shots of Rum (2009)

    " Precisely, rigorously, technically, 35 Shots of Rum is a masterpiece." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 16, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    62%

    Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself (2009)

    " To keep empire building, Perry needs to step up his game. And his new film -- the almost-musical I Can Do Bad All By Myself -- ain’t quite there." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 9, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    96%

    Crude (2009)

    " When well-meaning Trudie Styler, founder of Rainforest Foundation (and Sting’s wife), comes on, even Farjardo’s convictions and Berlinger’s early scenes about native culture and ancestry get swept up amidst hubristic hubbub." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 9, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    18%

    The Other Man (2009)

    " As the pathetic, decent lothario, Banderas lacks sexual threat just as the script’s various miscommunications lack Pinter menace. Neeson is too rough-hewn for the conflicted cuckold." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 9, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    100%

    Odd Man Out (1947)

    " This is not director Carol Reed’s best film (ranking behind The Third Man,The Stars Look Down, Outcast of the Islands, Night Train to Munich), but it impressively displays Reed’s command of image and atmosphere." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 2, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    87%

    Amreeka (2009)

    " Amreeka isn't great, but it's a relief when a movie that touches on America's post-9/11 unease regarding Muslims and the Arab world isn't full of condemnation." — New York Press

    Posted Sep 2, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    49%

    Taking Woodstock (2009)

    " Really, it’s the same circumstance captured in Bye Bye Birdie, but Lee and Schamus lack a sense of humor." — New York Press

    Posted Aug 26, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    59%

    The Headless Woman (2009)

    " Martel is a very minor art-filmmaker. Not especially insightful, she exemplifies the second-rate aesthetics of underdeveloped cultures. Her over-subtle approach hides the superficiality of her dull, dull style." — New York Press

    Posted Aug 26, 2009

    Rotten

    Rotten
    34%

    St. Trinian's (2009)

    " St.Trinian’s represents a travesty of the British comic tradition." — New York Press

    Posted Aug 26, 2009

    Fresh

    Fresh
    80%

    Bandslam (2009)

    " The barely hyped Bandslam must settle for simply being the best American movie this summer." — New York Press

    Posted Aug 19, 2009

    Rotten

    Fresh
    88%

    Inglourious Basterds (2009)

    " QT manipulates WWII horror into hip pornography -- Jewish revenge looks just like the sadism in Eli Roth’s Hostel movie. Our political and moral responses are discombobulated." — New York Press

    Posted Aug 19, 2009
     
     
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    Best Reviewed

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