|
|
26%
|
The Million Dollar Hotel (2000) |
"
A fascinating failure."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 16, 2001
|
|
|
83%
|
There's Something About Mary (1998) |
"
Mary is a pretty tame, often lame, but watchable no-brainer."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
2/5
|
16%
|
Assassins (1995) |
"
The action is stilted and infrequent, reduced to indifferent gun play, car chases and one standout explosion when a gas main ignites."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Mar 2, 2012
|
|
2/5
|
60%
|
Final Destination 5 (2011) |
"
Time for death to call in sick?"
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 24, 2011
|
|
2/5
|
23%
|
Case 39 (2010) |
"
Manages to be both very silly and highly forgettable. Only for those who collect killer-children films."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 28, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
6%
|
The Last Airbender (2010) |
"
Far from the catastrophe the US bewailed, but still disappointingly clunky."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 12, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
14%
|
Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore (2010) |
"
Nine years on from the first movie but somehow the effects have gone backwards and the charm has gone missing."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 5, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
53%
|
Knight & Day (2010) |
"
They make a fun duo, but none of the constituent genres work in this overbearing action-rom-com."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 5, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
79%
|
Office Space (1999) |
"
A shapeless comedy of little merit."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Mar 12, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
63%
|
Bitter Moon (1992) |
"
Deliberately provocative, infuriatingly melodramatic, this is a film that begs not to be taken seriously, and requires a ready suspension of moral discernment for maximum enjoyment."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Feb 19, 2010
|
|
2/5
|
50%
|
Pete's Dragon (1977) |
"
Another not very charming but harmless fusion of animation and good old real-life."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Oct 1, 2009
|
|
2/5
|
59%
|
The International (2009) |
"
For all its serious intent, Tykwer's 'relevant' thriller proves to be perilously naff."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Feb 27, 2009
|
|
2/5
|
54%
|
Body of Lies (2008) |
"
For all the enthralling visuals and action, the film feels garbled."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Nov 21, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
64%
|
Moonraker (1979) |
"
Bond meets Star Wars in one of the series' sillier outings."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Oct 13, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
69%
|
For Your Eyes Only (1981) |
"
Moore just looks confused."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Oct 13, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
39%
|
A View to a Kill (1985) |
"
Roger Moore's last Bond and not before time."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Oct 13, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
9%
|
Bangkok Dangerous (2008) |
"
Remove Cage's moody presence, and you could pick up this kind of action tat at your nearest service station."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 9, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
32%
|
Doctor Dolittle (1967) |
"
Not even a decent performance from Richard Attenborough can save this disappointing production."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 12, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
27%
|
What Happens in Vegas (2008) |
"
Bland enough to make millions as culture edges closer to oblivion."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 9, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
40%
|
Days of Thunder (1990) |
"
For die-hard Cruise fans and car mechanics only."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 7, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
75%
|
The Love Bug (1968) |
"
The first of the silly VW Beetle with a cute personality comedies, is as childish dated and occasionally sweet as the others."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 5, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
38%
|
Cleopatra (1963) |
"
For four hours this moody, glossy pantomime leadenly plods on, saying much more about the hubris and excess of old-time Hollywood thinking than the burnished glories of an ancient world."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 5, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
44%
|
Rocky IV (1985) |
"
Ridiculous jingoistic nonsense."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Mar 11, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
40%
|
Young Guns (1988) |
"
Good idea to cast the brat pack in a Western but this was badly realised and altogether a bit flat."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Feb 4, 2008
|
|
2/5
|
11%
|
Pathfinder (2007) |
"
Never has an idea of such splendid nuttiness been so squandered to the god of neurotic style."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 22, 2007
|
|
2/5
|
53%
|
All the Right Moves (1983) |
"
Cliched and clunky. Not really a great showcase for Cruise or Chris Penn."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 7, 2007
|
|
2/5
|
90%
|
The Simpsons Movie (2007) |
"
You chuckle here and there, you enjoy the animation (given a bit more pep and computery dimension for the big screen), but the moment it takes off never comes."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jul 25, 2007
|
|
2/5
|
83%
|
Quest for Fire (1981) |
"
This is supposed to be serious hard-hitting but with most prehistoric depictions, only manages either school reconstruction or parody."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 23, 2006
|
|
2/5
|
51%
|
Down in the Valley (2005) |
"
Agitated and painfully draggy, this hollow piece of contemporary psycho-trauma is what happens when everyone keeps banging on about how liberated and profound '70s filmmaking was."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 26, 2006
|
|
2/5
|
11%
|
Exorcist - The Beginning (2004) |
"
It isn't quite hell, but clambering to the end of this dusty remnant of an idea is certainly purgatory."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Apr 1, 2006
|
|
2/5
|
31%
|
The Longest Yard (2005) |
"
Homophobia, sexism, racism, ageism and OJ-ism pound against genre clichà (C)s as weathered as Reynolds' skin, bludgeoning you into submission."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 9, 2005
|
|
2/5
|
29%
|
The Chronicles of Riddick (2004) |
"
It's no Battlefield Earth, but it's no Dune either. And, no, before you ask, it's not destined to be a cult classic."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 28, 2004
|
|
2/5
|
46%
|
Secret Window (2004) |
"
Anyone with a passing knowledge of King's jam-packed oeuvre and its spotty movie translations will be fidgeting in their seats from the get-go."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted May 14, 2004
|
|
2/5
|
77%
|
The Tailor of Panama (2001) |
"
The film, for all its earnestness, snaky comedy, and would-be intelligence, never manages any real fizz."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Apr 20, 2001
|
|
2/5
|
39%
|
Hannibal (2001) |
"
Ranging from laughable to just plain boring, Hannibal is toothless to the end."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Feb 19, 2001
|
|
2/5
|
79%
|
Darkman (1990) |
"
Certainly not Raimi at his best, but some knowing genre nods and an array of great effects make up much of the deficit."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
2/5
|
15%
|
Metro (1997) |
"
A dismally perfunctory policier."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
2/5
|
59%
|
Twilight (1998) |
"
While it is always a pleasure to watch such heavyweights hold the screen together ... they deserved far more for their efforts than an emaciated potboiler that finally boils dry."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
2/5
|
2%
|
Battlefield Earth (2000) |
"
A disaster of epic proportions."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
2/5
|
33%
|
Romeo Must Die (2000) |
"
Great Kung Fu set pieces that are edited so fast that they are impossible to watch."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
3/5
|
41%
|
Heaven's Gate (1980) |
"
Flawed but interesting piece of art in the form of an anti-Western."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Mar 2, 2012
|
|
3/5
|
94%
|
Patience (After Sebald) (2012) |
"
With so many films adapted from novels, it's nice to see cinema paying homage to unheralded greats of literature like Sebald."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jan 23, 2012
|
|
3/5
|
85%
|
Jane Eyre (2011) |
"
There's no question it's stunningly mounted, and Wasikowska makes a much stronger Jane than Alice, but the romance is overripe and the climax underdone."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Sep 5, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
54%
|
Home Alone (1990) |
"
A hilarious comedy (although not a very believable one -- there can be no eight-year-olds this ingenious) that kids will love and adults won't mind sitting through either."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jul 26, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
59%
|
Dune (1984) |
"
It's not for everyone, but if you don't mind the brain-bending confusion of the plot and occasional feeling of '80s high camp, this isn't as bad as its detractors would have it."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Jul 18, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
85%
|
Farewell (L'affaire Farewell) (2010) |
"
Slightly underpowered as an espionage thriller, this is nonetheless a fascinating story told with real panache."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Apr 26, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
84%
|
Moby Dick (1956) |
"
The film takes flight as a grand chase movie, and leaves its ambition in its wake. "
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Apr 5, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
88%
|
Quo Vadis (1951) |
"
Enough large-scale spectacle scenes to outweigh the inevitable religiose sludge that creeps in between them."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Mar 23, 2011
|
|
3/5
|
88%
|
Africa United () |
"
The intention is Spain, the kids are Uruguay, but the direction and script are England."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Oct 20, 2010
|
|
3/5
|
41%
|
The Sorcerer's Apprentice (2010) |
"
Despite Cage in a snit, it's a likable if functional summer-show."
—
Empire Magazine
Posted Aug 12, 2010
|
67%
——
98%
