Critics » John J. Puccio » Rotten
John J. Puccio

John J. Puccio

Agrees with the Tomatometer 83% of the time.

Biography:
Teacher, English and Film Study, retired. Classical Music Editor, $ensible Sound magazine. Review Editor, DVDTOWN.com. Member, Online Film Critics Society (www.ofcs.org). Bright, quiet, loyal, dependable. Easily trained. Will fetch. Make offer. Home theater: Sony KDL-40XBR6 widescreen HD television, Toshiba HD-A35 HD-DVD player, Panasonic DMP-BD50 Blu-ray player, Onkyo TX-SR705 A/V receiver, 7.1 Boston Acoustics Reference Series speakers with Energy e:XL subwoofer, Harmony One universal remote, Monster Cable speaker wire and interconnects. Primary target: The ICBM missile complex at Lapuda. My earliest recollection of motion pictures having a profound and moving impact on me was in about 1951 or 52 when my dad took me to see "All Quiet on the Western Front," the 1930 film in rerelease. I remember the lobby was filled with display memorabilia--World War I uniforms, rifles, a small cannon of some sort--fascinating stuff to an eight-year-old kid. I loved the movie, I loved the action, I loved the main character, and I was totally shocked and shaken when at the end he was killed! This was the hero. Heroes didn't die. Not in the movies. Not anywhere. It wasn't for another day or two that the second revelation sunk in. The hero was a German. Understand, I saw this film only seven or eight years after the Second World War, and the Germans had been our enemies. When my friends and I played army men, the bad guys were always Germans or Japanese. (Never mind that I was Italian; the Italians, as far as I was concerned, had never even been in WWII, let alone fought against us.) Anyway, "All Quiet's" hero, Paul Baumer, was a German, yet I was totally sympathetic toward him. It wouldn't be for another few years that I would recognize the significance in my life of books and literature in quite the same way as I had by then learned the value of movies. And they were lessons I would never forget. I tend to wonder sometimes if I'd be teaching English and Film today if it weren't for that hand reaching out to the butterfly. Sweet, touching, funny, exciting, romantic, unforgettable, and ofttimes monumentally poignant images make good films what they are, different and precious for everyone who watches them.
Favorites:
Some favorite films: Casablanca, Citizen Kane, The Godfather I & II, The Third Man, 2001, Star Wars, The Wizard of Oz, Dr. Strangelove, Snow White, Fantasia, Pinocchio, A Night at the Opera, Some Like It Hot, To Kill a Mockingbird, M. Hulot's Holiday, Psycho, Cabaret, Day for Night, The Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Chronicles of Narnia, The Maltese Falcon, The Big Sleep, The Music Man, The Outlaw Josey Wales, The Haunting (1963), The Uninvited, True Lies, Contact, Moonstruck, Cool Hand Luke, Alien, Dark City, Devil in a Blue Dress, My Fair Lady, The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, Singin' in the Rain, Stardust, Pan's Labyrinth, and about a thousand more. Not-so-guilty pleasures: Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, The Ghost Breakers, Them! John
Publications:
Movie Metropolis
Critics' Group:
Online Film Critics Society
Total Reviews:
4129
Total QuickRatings:
197
Location:
Martinez, CA

Worst Reviewed Films

Showing 1 - 50 of 4129
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
0/5 63% The Last House on the Left (1972) Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 6, 2002
1/10 —— Bam Margera Presents: Where the #$&% is Santa? (2008) " ...the logical outgrowth of reality television, I suppose, where the idea is simply to point a camera at somebody and hope for the best. (Blu-ray Edition)" — Movie Metropolis
Posted Dec 5, 2008
1/10 —— Bam Margera Presents: Where the #$&% is Santa? (2008) " ...it's not so much a motion picture as it is an account of Bam and his friends horsing around for ninety-odd minutes." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Dec 5, 2008
1/10 11% Freddy Got Fingered (2001) " ...not just the bottom of the barrel, it's the putrid, festering decay lying beneath the barrel." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Apr 16, 2002
1/10 11% Freddy Got Fingered (2001) " Freddy Got Fingered makes Dude, Where's My Car? look like an Oscar contender." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 8, 2001
2/10 —— Jackass 3.5 (2011) " ...my hating it is undoubtedly the best thing the filmmakers could want me to say, and I wouldn't want to disappoint them. (Blu-ray edition)" — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 7, 2011
2/10 —— Jackass 3.5 (2011) " You'll like the all-new version, since it's fifteen minutes shorter than the previous one." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 7, 2011
2/10 0% Strange Wilderness (2008) " The movie starts out unfunny and gets unfunnier as it goes along. (Blu-ray Edition)" — Movie Metropolis
Posted Apr 11, 2009
2/10 0% Strange Wilderness (2008) " After watching Strange Wilderness, you may want to soak your feet in a tub of live piranhas, just for laughs. You'll find it a lot more fun than anything in this movie." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Apr 11, 2009
2/10 51% Funny Games (2008) " ...ugly and mean-spirited, which is I guess what its creator intended." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 9, 2008
2/10 51% Funny Games (2008) " ...a lurid piece of business, made all the more offensive for its apparent higher aspirations." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 9, 2008
2/10 —— Shot at Love with Tila Tequila - The Complete Unrated First Season (2008) " ...television at its worst, appealing to the lowest (and basest) common denominator." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Apr 6, 2008
2/10 —— Kill House () " I don't think it's asking too much for the film to deliver at least a modicum of respectability for a person's investment. This one delivers very little." — Movie Metropolis
Posted May 29, 2007
2/10 —— Kill House () " Kill House starts out poorly and only gets worse." — Movie Metropolis
Posted May 29, 2007
2/10 0% Rest Stop (2006) " ...if it's supposed to be a send-up of fright flicks, you could have fooled me. (Unrated Edition)" — Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 18, 2006
2/10 0% Rest Stop (2006) " ...another of those films where we just wish the madman would dispatch the leading lady as quickly as possible and be done with it, putting her and us out our misery." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 18, 2006
2/10 33% Ace Ventura - When Nature Calls (1995) " Thank heaven for the pause button and the few dozen breaks that helped relieve the pain." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 6, 2006
2/10 33% Ace Ventura - When Nature Calls (1995) " Warner Bros. doubled the budget for this sequel in 1995. For their trouble, they got half as funny a film." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 6, 2006
2/10 11% Night of the Lepus (1972) " ...not so much a horror movie as it is a horror of a movie." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 9, 2005
2/10 11% Night of the Lepus (1972) " The only thing more lifeless than the corpses in Night of the Lepus is the movie itself." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 9, 2005
2/10 0% The Crow - Wicked Prayer (2005) " ...the poor viewer can't even enjoy the compensation of finding it so bad as to be laughable in its awfulness. Hard to believe these Crows have gone downhill so fast." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jul 24, 2005
2/10 0% The Crow - Wicked Prayer (2005) " Appealing to the lowest possible tastes, it elevates violence to new levels of pander." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jul 24, 2005
2/10 10% Taxi (2004) " Among all the extras, I could find no trailer for Taxi, but I imagine that if I had, it would have been just about as much as I would have liked seeing of this film." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Mar 13, 2005
2/10 10% Taxi (2004) " Taxi is one long car chase, which quickly crashes and burns." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Mar 13, 2005
2/10 12% Showgirls (1995) " ...even with the campy audio commentary that's included with the new V.I.P. Edition, I found the movie virtually unwatchable." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jul 18, 2004
2/10 12% Showgirls (1995) " ...despite its rampant sexual material, it is not a sexy film. Dang, this thing couldn't get anything right." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jul 18, 2004
2/10 22% Torque (2004) " ...brainless, dull, nonstop action, flashing lights, loud noises, and raucous music for the sake of keeping our mind off the fact that nothing is actually happening." — Movie Metropolis
Posted May 6, 2004
2/10 22% Torque (2004) " Torque is so awful it would have embarrassed Roger Corman forty years ago." — Movie Metropolis
Posted May 6, 2004
2/10 21% Caligula (1979) " Having the dubious distinction of being the most elaborate and expensive porn film ever made, Caligula has come down to us as something of a hoot." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Dec 3, 2003
2/10 8% From Justin To Kelly (2003) " Since I've never watched an episode of "American Idol," I can't imagine what Justin or Kelly did to win. It surely couldn't have been singing, dancing, or acting...."" — Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 14, 2003
2/10 8% From Justin To Kelly (2003) " The movie is billed as a romantic musical comedy. You coulda fooled me." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 14, 2003
2/10 33% Ice From the Sun (1999) " ...shows an admirable inventiveness while working on a shoestring, but raucous technique and repulsive images do not make for praiseworthy entertainment." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 6, 2003
2/10 33% Ice From the Sun (1999) " Here and there one can detect the slightest vestiges of creative fancy peeking through the rubble of horrific brutality, gimmicky, and din." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 6, 2003
2/10 19% Just Married (2003) " ...banal chatter, glaring insults, and juvenile slapstick. It's only the movie's PG-13 rating that saves it from being grossly crude, as well." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 20, 2003
2/10 19% Just Married (2003) " ...nails the lowest possible IQ in the audience by being as insipid as it is boring." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jun 20, 2003
2/10 37% Sordid Lives (2000) " The characters in Sordid Lives are dull and shrill, and its plot is pointless." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Mar 6, 2003
2/10 37% Sordid Lives (2000) " Its stereotypes are insulting, its jokes are unfunny, and its emotions are labored. Sordid Lives is a sordid movie." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Mar 6, 2003
2/10 —— Python 2 (Pythons 2) (Snakes) (2002) " ...I expected every minute for commercials to pop up. They would have relieved the monotony." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jan 9, 2003
2/10 —— Python 2 (Pythons 2) (Snakes) (2002) " Rent this one at your own risk." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Jan 9, 2003
1/5 19% Boxing Helena (1993) Movie Metropolis
Posted Oct 23, 2002
1/5 0% Leprechaun 2 (1994) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 20, 2002
1/5 —— Slumber Party Massacre III (Stab in the Dark) (1990) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 20, 2002
1/5 10% Friday the 13th Part VIII - Jason Takes Manhattan (1989) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 16, 2002
1/5 17% Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter (2003) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 16, 2002
1/5 30% The Slumber Party Massacre (1982) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 10, 2002
1/5 0% Wishmaster 2: Evil Never Dies (1999) Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 10, 2002
2/10 24% Exorcist II - The Heretic (1977) " I wish I could tell you what the film was about, but having seen it three times now, I still don't know." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 8, 2002
2/10 24% Exorcist II - The Heretic (1977) " Compelling reasons for watching Exorcist II? Well, there's Richard Burton's voice. Then, there's...uh.... Oh, forget it. There are no reasons for watching this film." — Movie Metropolis
Posted Sep 8, 2002
1/5 0% Puppet Master IV (Puppet Master 4) (1993) Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 27, 2002
1/5 0% Return to the Blue Lagoon (1991) Movie Metropolis
Posted Aug 24, 2002
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