ROTTEN TOMATOES: Movie Reviews & Previews

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Peter Hartlaub

Agrees with the Tomatometer 75% of the time.

Publications:: Houston Chronicle , San Francisco Chronicle

Total Reviews:: 397

Worst Reviewed Films

Showing 1 - 50 of 395

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Rating	T-Meter	Title \| Year	Add Date
0/4	0%	Redline (2007)	" Do yourself a favor and stay home. Griffin's 21-second wrecking-the-Enzo video on YouTube is more exciting (and better directed, and better acted ...) than anything in Redline." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 16, 2007
0/4	4%	Material Girls (2006)	" The scariest part of Material Girls comes when you're sitting in the dark theater and start considering the possibility that young women might find these characters sympathetic." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 21, 2006
0/4	4%	Bloodrayne (2006)	" Uwe Boll is such a bad director that it must be intentional." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jan 9, 2006
0/4	10%	Venom (2005)	" There's nothing clever about this movie. It starts too slow, plot points are abandoned and even the killings start to run together." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Sep 16, 2005
0/4	1%	Alone in the Dark (2005)	" A film so mind-blowingly horrible that it teeters on the edge of cinematic immortality." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jan 28, 2005
0/4	4%	Darkness (2004)	" It's unoriginal, frequently incomprehensible and cheaply made, and moviegoers should avoid theaters that show this film just to eliminate the chance of walking in accidentally." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 29, 2004
0/4	0%	National Lampoon's Gold Diggers (2004)	" Imagine a horrible parallel universe, where Pauly Shore is allowed to direct a remake of Harold and Maude." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Sep 17, 2004
0.5/4	11%	The Cave (2005)	" A claustrophobic horror film that provides nothing original beyond its underground setting." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 26, 2005
0.5/4	2%	King's Ransom (2005)	" The Chronicle's Little Man was fighting an internal struggle to abandon his chair altogether, but was ultimately swayed to continue his nap, mostly by a few of the comics in supporting roles." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 26, 2005
1/5	8%	Grind (2003)	" Attempts to combine the extreme sports visuals of a good Warren Miller ski film with the plot of a bad Tom Green picture and doesn't come close to landing on four wheels." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 15, 2003
1/4	13%	Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011)	" It's an uninspired and instantly forgettable film. But it completely succeeds by its own standards: an 87-minute rainy-day distraction that will probably make a zillion dollars." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 15, 2011
1/4	——	Golf In The Kingdom (2011)	" For anyone coming in cold, this can be a ponderous cinematic experience." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 8, 2011
1/4	11%	There Be Dragons (2011)	" "Dragons" may have seemed less out of place three decades ago, but it would have been a bad movie then as well." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted May 5, 2011
1/4	11%	Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs Evil (2011)	" One would hope that Martin Scorsese and Brian De Palma are getting some kind of royalty from all the mediocre comedies and animated movies that keep ripping off their films." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 28, 2011
1/4	4%	Vampires Suck (2010)	" The running time is a merciful 80 minutes. That's the one reliably great thing about reviewing bad movies: Almost all of the biggest losers are less than an hour and a half long. " — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 18, 2010
1/4	29%	Survival of the Dead (2010)	" For the first time, a Romero zombie movie feels as if it was rushed out." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted May 27, 2010
1/4	63%	When You're Strange (2010)	" When You're Strange is a remedial Doors class, taught by a professor who sounds as if he's doing voiceovers for car commercials." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 8, 2010
1/4	21%	Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009)	" Despite its success as a babysitter for preschoolers, it's a not a very good film." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 22, 2009
1/4	38%	Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)	" It's clear that the filmmakers had a hard time adapting Darren Shan's books, made the movie way too long and then hacked indiscriminately at the last minute. Some important scenes are cut off abruptly, and others seem to be missing altogether." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Oct 23, 2009
1/4	27%	Play The Game (2009)	" Play the Game has all kinds of good intentions, but the comedy is too broad and the pacing is clumsy. Take away the dirty parts, and this is the type of thing you can get for free on the Hallmark Channel every day." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 28, 2009
1/4	31%	Aliens in the Attic (2009)	" It's doubtful that many people will be asking for their money back after seeing this movie. But they won't be remembering too much about it 24 hours later, either." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jul 31, 2009
1/4	29%	Irene in Time (2009)	" There's some sharply written dialogue, and a few strong performances in supporting roles. But much of the action onscreen doesn't ring true." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jul 24, 2009
1/4	14%	I Love You Beth Cooper (2009)	" Beth Cooper isn't a terrible addition to the teen coming-of-age party movie catalog. It just feels dated." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jul 10, 2009
1/4	22%	Blood: The Last Vampire (2009)	" If that sounds kind of hot, don't get your hopes up." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jul 10, 2009
1/4	18%	Dance Flick (2009)	" Dance Flick is a movie that will make you yearn for the subtle humor and profound character exploration of White Chicks." — Houston Chronicle Posted May 22, 2009
1/4	21%	Next Day Air (2009)	" Screenwriter Blair Cobbs delivers some good lines, but the inconsistent tone and overacting by some of the lesser actors sabotage his efforts." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted May 8, 2009
1/4	44%	Hannah Montana: The Movie (2009)	" If you're no longer old enough to carry a Hannah Montana lunch box, this movie will feel like punishment." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 10, 2009
1/4	17%	The Haunting in Connecticut (2009)	" It's boring to pick apart a movie's inconsistencies one by one, but The Haunting in Connecticut contains so many insults to the audience's intelligence, it doesn't offer much choice." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Mar 27, 2009
1/4	34%	Knowing (2009)	" It's pretty much impossible to take the rest of a film seriously once you've seen a flaming moose running toward the camera in slow motion." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Mar 20, 2009
1/4	25%	Friday the 13th (2009)	" Hopefully, there's something in President Obama's stimulus package that will help the ailing slasher-movie industry." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Feb 13, 2009
1/4	40%	Otto; or Up with Dead People (2008)	" Moviegoers with a LaBruce fetish will appreciate another imaginative offering from the filmmaker. Mainstream audiences should stay far, far away." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jan 16, 2009
—	33%	Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009)	" I suppose the food equivalent would be that nacho cheese that comes in a can with little chunks of jalape�o mixed in." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jan 16, 2009
	14%	The Spirit (2008)	" Miller's distinction as one of the all-time best comic book writers is strong enough to withstand his role in making one of the worst comic book movies ever." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 29, 2008
1/4	21%	The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)	" This was supposed to be the winter season's big special effects picture. So why does it make Al Gore's PowerPoint presentation look like Spider-Man 2 by comparison?" — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 12, 2008
1/4	36%	Transporter 3 (2008)	" The weakest in the series and a rare disappointment from French action movie producer Luc Besson." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Nov 26, 2008
1/4	19%	Righteous Kill (2008)	" In the end, neither actor can muster the energy to rise above the subpar material." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Sep 12, 2008
1/4	43%	Death Race (2008)	" The combination of good actors and terrible dialogue might have allowed the film a chance at minor cult status, if it weren't for the frustratingly inept action sequences." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Aug 22, 2008
1/4	39%	Xanadu (1980)	— San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jul 8, 2008
1/4	27%	What Happens in Vegas (2008)	" Considering that the title of the movie was conceived by the Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority, it's not a huge surprise that What Happens in Vegas is stocked with product placement." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted May 9, 2008
1/4	38%	Where in the World Is Osama Bin Laden? (2008)	" [Spurlock's] work here leans closer to Tyra Banks wearing her fat suit than anything directed by Errol Morris or even Michael Moore." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Apr 18, 2008
1/4	32%	Meet The Browns (2008)	" There are a few laughs and some touching moments, but nothing you couldn't get by watching episodes of Good Times and Little House on the Prairie back to back." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Mar 24, 2008
1/4	8%	10,000 B.C. (2008)	" While the movie is completely ridiculous, at least it's fun to think of all the high school students who are going to mistake this movie for an accurate historical record and get F's on their next pop quiz." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Mar 6, 2008
1/4	15%	Over Her Dead Body (2008)	" The grating presence of Longoria Parker will be enough to ruin the movie for many, but she's just one of many shortcomings in this romantic comedy, which seriously lacks both romance and comedy." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Feb 1, 2008
1/4	13%	First Sunday (2008)	" Ice Cube has been taking a lot of heat in recent years for abandoning his tough guy image in exchange for Hollywood stardom, and First Sunday appears to be a compromise." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jan 11, 2008
1/4	16%	Revolver (2005)	" The plot isn't intellectually challenging as much as it is confusing, and yet the big twist is completely telegraphed. Ritchie has created a movie that is patronizingly obvious one minute and impenetrable the next." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 14, 2007
1/4	26%	Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)	" Between the occasional amusing joke and catchy musical number, this Alvin update is a very soulless movie." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Dec 14, 2007
1/4	17%	Saw IV (2007)	" The Syriana of slasher films, so complicated and circuitous that your only hope of understanding everything is to eat lots of fish the night before and then watch each of the previous films, in order, right before you enter the theater." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Oct 29, 2007
1/4	5%	Good Luck Chuck (2007)	" It's worth mentioning for the third time that this movie is much closer to Caligula than Sleepless in Seattle." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Sep 21, 2007
1/4	15%	The Brothers Solomon (2007)	" It's hard to hate a movie that tries so valiantly to resurrect the career of Lee Majors. But even that noble task ultimately fails." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Sep 7, 2007
1/4	60%	Gracie (2007)	" Everyone who made this movie had his or her heart in the right place, even though they got so much wrong." — San Francisco Chronicle Posted Jun 1, 2007

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