JoBlo

JoBlo

Agrees with the Tomatometer 65% of the time.

Biography:
Born in Amsterdam, Holland, the son of an immigrant Armenian father and a Swedish buxom mother, Berge spent the first eight years of his life trying to find a way out of his soulless existence on our planet. His discovery of television quickly dissolved that dilemma and shot his mind into the nothingness that still remains fairly prominent today. After losing his parents in Switzerland one weekend, Berge dedicated his life to "finding himself" in film and "getting laid" before the age of 21. Successful at neither, Berge swam across the Atlantic Ocean and spent his "salad days" working the graveyard shift at the local Bob’s Big Boy.After an unsuccessful robbery attempt on himself, Berge realized that his days of bumming smokes off others were dwindling (And he didn’t even smoke!). He quickly shaved himself down, washed his *** and watched "Reservoir Dogs" about a hundred times before investing his life to the medium of film. And with his quick stint in the gay porn industry behind him, Berge re-dedicated himself to writing movie screenplays, of which he wrote four, completing his MBA and becoming an online movie critic for the masses. Having worked in the fast-food and porn industries, Berge felt like he had an affinity with the common folk, the lunch box people, the people who stayed up late and watched an awful lot of Tony Robbins commercials. Thankfully, Berge was able to convert his sad drinking problem into a much happier drinking problem and eventually secure himself a part-time gig as movie critic for a local Canadian radio station. He also started up JoBlo’s Movie Emporium: A haven for all movie orphans like himself. Nowadays, Berge is happily married with three kids (The kids aren’t really his and he’s actually single) and spends most of this time surfing the Net in search of his missing parents. His long-term goal is to become a film producer, while his short-term motto remains the same as it has always been: "It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man." Thank you, Mr. Jack Handy.
Favorites:
Some of my favourite movies include: Goodfellas, Star Wars, When Harry met Sally, Fight Club, Swingers, Reservoir Dogs, Edward Scissorhands, True Romance, Dark City, Annie Hall, Lost Highway, Airplane 1 & 2, Raising Arizona, The Crow, Seven, Trainspotting.
Publications:
DVD Clinic , JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Total Reviews:
1420
Total QuickRatings:
1
Location:
Montreal, Canada

Listing Of All Reviews & Articles

Showing 1 - 50 of 1420
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Rating T-Meter Title | Year Add Date
3.5/5 79% Léon: The Professional (1994) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 100% Spoorloos (The Vanishing) (1988) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2.5/5 35% Levity (2003) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2/5 6% Johnson Family Vacation (2004) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 97% Dumbo (1941) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 20% Fatal Instinct (1993) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4/5 85% Spellbound (1945) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2/5 —— Wild Things 2 (2004) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
1.5/5 50% We're No Angels (1989) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 89% In America (2003) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 94% American Splendor (2003) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4.5/5 85% Jerry Maguire (1996) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2/5 7% Glitter (2001) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 79% The Accidental Tourist (1988) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2/5 34% The Center of the World (2001) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 100% Roger & Me (1989) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 97% Groundhog Day (1993) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4.5/5 91% True Romance (1993) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4/5 72% Auto Focus (2002) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
1.5/5 29% Pootie Tang (2001) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 88% Rain Man (1988) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 64% Wild Things (1998) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 88% Prizzi's Honor (1985) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 89% The Sure Thing (1985) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 62% Vampire's Kiss (1989) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 96% Pumping Iron (2003) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3/5 —— Samurai Jack - The Premiere Movie (2001) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4.5/5 97% GoodFellas (1990) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2.5/5 56% I Love You to Death (1990) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
4.5/5 78% Predator (1987) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2.5/5 23% Dancing At The Blue Iguana (2000) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 91% Miller's Crossing (1990) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
3.5/5 88% Nikita (La Femme Nikita) (1990) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
2/5 17% Laws of Attraction (2004) DVD Clinic
Posted Apr 25, 2012
30% Survival of the Dead (2010) JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Mar 16, 2012
4/5 —— Office Tigers (2006) DVD Clinic
Posted May 25, 2011
6/10 92% Panic (2000) JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 29, 2011
4% In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2006) " Don't waste your time." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 15, 2011
59% RocknRolla (2008) JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 15, 2011
9/10 56% The Revenant (2012) " The Revenant is flat-out fantastic horror-comedy that is safely mentioned in the same breath as masterpieces such as Re-Animator." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 15, 2011
—— Dread (2009) JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 15, 2011
7/10 36% Descent (2007) JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Apr 4, 2011
7/10 78% Burn After Reading (2008) " All in all though, fun times. I look forward to revisiting it again in the future, like most Coen bros movies." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Nov 21, 2008
7/10 45% The Strangers (2008) " An extremely effective claustrophobic horror picture that starts slow but ultimately provides us with plenty of suspense all the way through to its very dark ending." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Nov 21, 2008
5/10 41% Hancock (2008) " What an odd movie!" — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Nov 21, 2008
7/10 39% Speed Racer (2008) " A flashy, colorful film that packs a ton o' fun into its fast-paced frame." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Oct 18, 2008
8/10 71% Wanted (2008) " Kudos to graphic novelists Mark Millar and J.G. Jones for coming up with this fun and electric idea in the first place and here's hoping that they can create an ongoing cool environment in which these groovy characters can excel." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Oct 18, 2008
5/10 63% Baby Mama (2008) " I've been majorly disappointed by romantic comedies over the past year or so." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Oct 18, 2008
7/10 37% You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008) " I cracked up during a lot of this movie." — JoBlo's Movie Emporium
Posted Oct 18, 2008
Showing 1 - 50 of 1420
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