|
F
|
15%
|
What Love Is (2008) |
"
A shrill cacophony of puerile clichés about men and women and sex, delivered in adrenaline-driven harangues and arrogant lectures. When the stage clears, all that's left is the unpleasant odor of all that hot air."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 22, 2007
|
|
F
|
9%
|
Norbit (2007) |
"
... a strange, toneless collection of fat jokes, fart jokes and foul sex gags."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Feb 8, 2007
|
|
F
|
9%
|
Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005) |
"
... a non-stop barrage of crude dialogue and vulgar sight gags that passes as humor among adolescent boys."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 11, 2005
|
|
F
|
25%
|
Mindhunters (2005) |
"
One-time action wunderkind Renny Harlin proves once again that coherence is not his forte."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted May 12, 2005
|
|
F
|
0%
|
National Lampoon's Gold Diggers (2004) |
"
Priesler plays the whole thing as a flamboyant freak show, smacking the audience... with tasteless gags and grotesque extremes of human behavior and calling it humor."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Sep 16, 2004
|
|
F
|
23%
|
See Spot Run (2001) |
"
An unfunny farce with nary a clever line and not a single surprising sight gag."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 1, 2001
|
|
D
|
10%
|
Bride Wars (2009) |
"
All it takes is a bride scorned to turn a stock movie character into a raving caricature of emotional instability."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jan 8, 2009
|
|
D
|
22%
|
Never Back Down (2008) |
"
... spouts a hollow message of nonviolence while celebrating the brutal satisfaction of beating the crap out of someone."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 13, 2008
|
|
D
|
40%
|
The Bucket List (2007) |
"
The most insipidly innocuous film ever made about facing mortality and living it up before passing away, The Bucket List has as much poetry and poise as its clumsy, clunky title."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jan 10, 2008
|
|
D
|
15%
|
Hannibal Rising (2007) |
"
Not just a bad film, Hannibal Rising is downright dull, which is a far worse crime."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Feb 8, 2007
|
|
D
|
4%
|
Happily N'ever After (2006) |
"
All it lacks is wit, character and laughs."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jan 4, 2007
|
|
D
|
13%
|
Haven (2006) |
"
Welcome to the tawdry end of paradise, where no melodrama is too obvious and no conflict too contrived."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Sep 21, 2006
|
|
D
|
22%
|
The Quiet (2006) |
"
... lost in the twilight between Gothic social drama and lurid exploitation."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 31, 2006
|
|
D
|
22%
|
Typhoon (2006) |
"
By the time it makes landfall, this incoherent production has blown itself out."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jun 1, 2006
|
|
D
|
4%
|
The Celestine Prophecy (2006) |
"
... indifferent direction douses whatever conviction gave the novel its ardent following."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Apr 21, 2006
|
|
D
|
56%
|
Naked in Ashes (2005) |
"
It idolizes the idea of spiritual purity without offering any insight into what it really means."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Dec 12, 2005
|
|
D
|
32%
|
Pretty Persuasion (2005) |
"
(Marcus) Siega plays racism, class disdain, ignorance and self-absorption for glib laughs in his equally glib satire..."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Sep 1, 2005
|
|
D
|
11%
|
The Cave (2005) |
"
A high-concept creature feature that manages to fumble the concept and the creature in its sloppy execution."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 25, 2005
|
|
D
|
25%
|
House of Wax (2005) |
"
(Director) Collet-Serra has no facility for suspense or mood, and he stretches out the brain-dead dialogue and plodding plot until it's numbing."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted May 8, 2005
|
|
D
|
20%
|
The Pacifier (2005) |
"
The tinny dialogue of the clumsy screenplay stumbles over the simplest moments of exposition and revelation and Adam Shankman's anonymous direction is plodding at best..."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 4, 2005
|
|
D
|
11%
|
Are We There Yet? (2005) |
"
Director Brian Levant can't pace a scene, develop a character or time a joke, but finally his criminal misuse of the spirit of Satchel Paige is too much. This road trip never gets out of the driveway."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jan 20, 2005
|
|
D
|
26%
|
Blade: Trinity (2004) |
"
The third time out for the vampire-hunting superhero is no charm."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Dec 8, 2004
|
|
D
|
14%
|
Without A Paddle (2004) |
"
Imagine Deliverance as a PG-13 slapstick cartoon for 13-year-old boys. Better yet, don't."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 19, 2004
|
|
D
|
15%
|
Garfield - The Movie (2004) |
"
This isn't a movie, it's a marketing ploy."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jun 10, 2004
|
|
D
|
70%
|
Dogville (2003) |
"
[von Trier's] contempt for humanity is becoming harder to hide with stylistic flourish. He doesn't even try here, and his arrogance is topped only by his misanthropy."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Apr 15, 2004
|
|
D
|
55%
|
The Girl Next Door (2004) |
"
Despite the cynical cleverness and slick direction by Luke Greenfield, (it) favors giggly juvenile humor over inspired satire and ends up not with a moral, but a moral vacuum."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Apr 8, 2004
|
|
D
|
6%
|
Johnson Family Vacation (2004) |
"
Tired and glib, it tries to milk humor from the sniping, sass and simple disrespect of its unpleasant traveling companions."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Apr 8, 2004
|
|
D
|
21%
|
Scooby-Doo 2 - Monsters Unleashed (2004) |
"
I'd be tempted to call the whole thing cartoonish, but that would be insulting to the real thing."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 25, 2004
|
|
D
|
7%
|
Gigli (2003) |
"
Anyone on the Internet grapevine already has the news: Gigli is this summer's rotten egg."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 1, 2003
|
|
D
|
10%
|
Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd (2003) |
"
... all the class of a whoopee cushion at a funeral, and far fewer laughs."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jun 13, 2003
|
|
D
|
65%
|
My Little Eye (2002) |
"
... an unimaginative, nasty, glibly cynical piece of work."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jun 6, 2003
|
|
D
|
2%
|
Half Past Dead (2002) |
"
Just to clear up any possible confusion, the title actually refers to Steven Seagal's latest action film, not his gasping-for-air film career."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Nov 14, 2002
|
|
D
|
7%
|
All The Queen's Men (2001) |
"
Afraid to pitch into farce, yet only half-hearted in its spy mechanics, All the Queen's Men is finally just one long drag."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Oct 24, 2002
|
|
D
|
23%
|
Who is Cletis Tout? (2002) |
"
(A) misfired exercise in recycled crime movie clichés..."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Aug 1, 2002
|
|
D
|
6%
|
The New Guy (2002) |
"
... so disconnected you have to wonder if pages were lost on the way to the set."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted May 9, 2002
|
|
D
|
3%
|
Rollerball (2002) |
"
... a silly, stupid, incoherent mess."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Feb 7, 2002
|
|
D
|
10%
|
Slackers (2002) |
"
...the film falls back on the same old formula of teen sex, outrageous pranks and scenes designed to push the envelope of bad taste for laughs."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Feb 1, 2002
|
|
D
|
6%
|
Corky Romano (2001) |
"
The lazy script substitutes goofy situations for actual gags, much of which falls flat under Rob Pritts' plodding direction."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Oct 12, 2001
|
|
D
|
42%
|
Dr. Dolittle 2 (2001) |
"
The clunky direction of Steve Carr (Next Friday) lurches from one scene to another with the grace of a pratfall and the script reads more like a skit comedy than a story."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jun 22, 2001
|
|
D
|
33%
|
Angel Eyes (2001) |
"
a leaden piece of touchy-feely melodrama about a pair of soul-scarred trauma survivors who fall in love and start tearing down the walls they've built around their hearts. "
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted May 18, 2001
|
|
D
|
15%
|
The Trumpet of the Swan (2001) |
"
May hold the attention of the very young, but despite marginal attempts at Disney-style cleverness, the simplistic writing, flat animation and sloppy direction will leave adults bored."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted May 11, 2001
|
|
D
|
9%
|
Say It Isn't So (2001) |
"
A one-joke, one-note turkey that works over Sam Shepard's Fool for Love as a mistaken identity farce hammered into the Mary blueprint, but without any of its invention, energy or heart."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Mar 23, 2001
|
|
2/10
|
9%
|
Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000) |
"
No style, no irony and no smarts, just a vicious streak that lasts 90 minutes."
—
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Posted Jan 1, 2000
|
|
|
62%
|
When You're Strange (2010) |
"
... the same stories and clichés of living hard and dying young"
—
Seanax.com
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
|
63%
|
Hot Tub Time Machine (2010) |
"
... swaps out clever plotting and smartly-tuned dialogue for horndog humor, excrement gags, drunken shenanigans and, of course, wanton sex..."
—
Seanax.com
Posted Jul 1, 2010
|
|
|
——
|
Hawthorne: Season One (2010) |
"
She's not the most likable character on TV, and not as interesting as the more self-destructive Nurse Jackie, but she runs a good crew in a floundering hospital."
—
Parallax View
Posted Jun 27, 2010
|
|
|
——
|
Unthinkable (2010) |
"
... a clumsy polemic that bounces between the boundaries of stage-play debate and torture porn spectacle as everyone argues over ethics..."
—
Seanax.com
Posted Jun 27, 2010
|
|
|
53%
|
Green Zone (2010) |
"
Though based on a work of nonfiction and directed with a dirty, dusty realism, it's still more cynical Hollywood conspiracy thriller than political exposé..."
—
MSN.com
Posted Jun 27, 2010
|
|
|
——
|
Riverworld (2010) |
"
This is practically flavorless and ultimately without any distinctive identity, just another SyFy original movie with better production values"
—
Seanax.com
Posted Jun 27, 2010
|
|
|
——
|
Eastwood Factor (2010) |
"
It's an enjoyable visit but frustratingly slim as a documentary, with no real insights to the artist or his working methods."
—
Parallax View
Posted Jun 13, 2010
|
75%
22%
67%
85%
46%
40%
