ROTTEN TOMATOES: Ho-ho-horror! 10 Scary Christmas Movies

Ho-ho-horror! 10 Scary Christmas Movies

by Michael Adams

Discuss Article

Page | 1 2

64%

Black Christmas

John Carpenter's 1978 Halloween is a classic, no two ways about it, but Bob Clark set the pace with this seasonally titled slasher featuring point-of-view killer-cam. With its frighteneing phone calls -- coming from inside the house! -- it also hugely anticipated When A Stranger Calls, which was a hit in 1979. This disturbing piece of work takes place over the Christmas break when an emptied sorority house is stalked by a maniac with some pretty serious issues and an even more serious case of maniacal laughter. Stalkees include Margot Kidder and Olivia Hussey. You can go to the grave without worrying about 2006's needless remake.

76%

Bad Santa

This is one of the most quotable Christmas movies ever -- but you'll be locked up if you start reciting the lines in front of the kids. Directed by Terry Zwigoff, who gave us Crumb and Ghost World, and produced by the Coen brothers, this is Christmas fare at its most blackly comic. Billy Bob Thornton is Willie, a boozy and bitter mall Santa who, with Tony Cox's sidekick elf, each year uses his access to commit a department-store burglary. He's a funny bastard -- whose dark side is lightened somewhat when he takes a nerdy kid under his stinking armpit -- but what he likes to do with overweight ladies' bottoms is so scary we can't put it on a family site like this one.

N/A

Santa With Muscles

Unless your official title is "Mila Kunis's Number One Fan Fovever!" you can live without ever pressing Play on this underfed but overbaked Christmas turkey. Hulk Hogan plays an amnesiac rich dude who, thanks to stupid scripting, comes to believe that he's Santa. Thus he dons a cut-off version of the red suit and saves some orphans (one of them being young Mila) from an evil developer by doing a bit of PG-friendly ass-kicking. Supporting players include Clint Howard and Ed Begley Jr, just to ham things up further. Truly, as a family comedy, this is a lump of coal in your stocking.

27%

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Unless your official title is "Pia Zadora's Number One Fan Forever!" -- and it can't be, because Christmas-maniac John Waters already has that job -- then you can also do without this famous Z-grade yuletide offering. Martian parents, observing how listless their kids are, decide to kidnap Santa to cheer up the little tykes (one of who is Pia, aged about six, and blissfully unaware that her future included Butterfly and The Lonely Lady). Pantomime shenanigans ensue which include a bad Martian and his robot and a finale involving a billion or so bubbles! If you're four years old, you might just dig it. Parents however will be driven instantly insane by the title track, "Hooray For Santy Claus".

97%

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Speaking of kidnapping Santa, well, that's just what misguided Jack Skellington does in this wonderful stop-motion black comedy from producer Tim Burton and director Henry Selick, who'd do this year's brilliant (and similarly dark) Coraline. Our misfit hero, previously in charge of Halloween -- he does, after all, live in Halloweentown -- stumbles into Christmastown and likes the idea of being Santa a whole lot better. So, he kidnaps St. Nick and takes his place, bestowing a bunch of highly inappropriate gifts on unsuspecting children everywhere. Like Gremlins, The Nightmare Before Christmas is a perfect introduction to horror-comedy for younger kids.

Michael Adams is the author of the upcoming book Showgirls, Teen Wolves, and Astro Zombies: A Film Critic's Year-Long Quest to Find the Worst Movie Ever Made (It Books/HarperCollins)

Page | 1 2

(1-20 of 39 posts) | Reply

De4ective Detectiv3 writes:
on Nov 04 2009 06:46 PM

Wow, sort of stretching w/ this list. What about the ref, having Dennis Leary as your marriage counseler seems pretty horrific to me. Not to mention he plays a burglar who breaks into a couples house and holds them hostage...

(Reply to this)

aumid s. writes:
on Nov 04 2009 06:59 PM

http://www.maplestory4mesos.com is a Specialized MapleStory Mesos store,we sell Maple Story Mesos,you can also buy Safe MapleStory Account,Cheap MapleStory Powerleveling from us."
http://www.accountmmo.com/runescape-account.html is the best way to buy or sell runescape accounts. There are also hundreds runescape account for sale. Update runescape accounts everyday.100% safe guaranteed for buy or sell runescape accounts.

(Reply to this)

THECOWBELLHASSPOKEN writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:06 PM

bad santa is a freakin CLASSIC

(Reply to this)

Launy S. writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:41 PM

M'eh...less than a week after Halloween and RT sells out with a Christmas list. Call me Scrooge, go ahead. For that matter, it's also a pretty crappy and pointless list to boot, just like the remake of Black Christmas. I expect a better effort from RT, and a bit more time to digest the fact that Christmas is still more than a month away. And if you wanna talk scary, where the hell is Reindeer Games?

(Reply to this)

mclobstabush writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:42 PM

I want to see that "Evil Santa" movie.

(Reply to this)

King Kubrick writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:47 PM

What's really pathetic is I have literally seen every single film on this list. But you can thank the immortal MST3K for my introduction to most of these films.

Black Christmas is pretty seminal in the slasher pantheon, preceding halloween as it does.

The creepiest part of Santa Claus is the weird eye telescope he and the children use to spy on Satan's evil doings. Because ya know the bible is rife with stories about Satan's machinations against santa clause.

(Reply to this)

DanielthePhantasm XIX writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:52 PM

its a wonderful life is one of the best christmas movies ever

(Reply to this)

MAdams writes:
on Nov 04 2009 07:58 PM

In reply to this comment (#2558689)
You got that right, KK! The eye telescope and the lips on the computer are just super-disturbing. Same goes with Santa's mate, whose job it is to drug the world's population for Christmas sleepytime.Another good one -- totally, totally obscure is The Magic Christmas Tree. So very bad that even MST3K left it alone!

(Reply to this)

John N. writes:
on Nov 04 2009 08:40 PM

RT creative juices are running low. Bad Santa and It's a Wonderful Life are scary movies?

So when is Eli Roth getting around to Thanksgiving? Rodriguez has time to write and direct 3 movies in the time it takes Eli Roth to even get a producer credit on some direct to DVD crapfest horror movie.

(Reply to this)

MAdams writes:
on Nov 04 2009 08:57 PM

In reply to this comment (#2558707)
Drunk santa menacing kids and the dignity of ladies behinds ain't scary? Economic meltdown and suicide not a tad frightening? I beg to differ! But on the Eli Roth thing: totally.

(Reply to this)

Axl writes:
on Nov 04 2009 09:16 PM

die hard

(Reply to this)

ledawg1138 writes:
on Nov 04 2009 09:25 PM

Odd list...and some of these entries are debatable. But, nice work.

(Reply to this)

Ant L. writes:
on Nov 04 2009 09:34 PM

crazy list

http://www.facebook.com/pages/ArtVille/168015201015?v=wall

(Reply to this)

MADDAZ writes:
on Nov 04 2009 09:44 PM

Ho-Ho- Horror, yeah right. After reading this list im surprised there was no Home Alone. Gremlins gives my kids nightmares so I guess its scary for the kiddies. Die Hard is by the far the only xmas movie. Ho-Ho-Ho now I have machine gun.

(Reply to this)

ARTaylor writes:
on Nov 04 2009 11:28 PM

I don't really see It's a Wonderful Life as being scary. Sure there are parts of drama and it can get tense but I would never call anything from it as scary. Now Scrooged does have it's scary moments. Particularly with the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come as he reaches out of the television sets and that giant hand almost grabs Bill Murray. Gremlins has plenty of scary moments, and is actually a great movie to show those kids ready for something scarier than the coming to life scene in Toy Story. And Nightmare Before Christmas is really only scary to little kids. I remember seeing that in theaters when I was about six and it didn't scare me. It never gets scarier than any Saturday morning cartoon show does. It's fun but not scary.

Of course if you included movies that had Christmas in it rather than movies intended to be Christmas movies then you could have Die Hard, Die Hard 2, and Batman Returns.

(Reply to this)

James T. writes:
on Nov 05 2009 12:07 AM

Gremlins is scary when your younger maybe, but definitely funny when your older. Also the movie can be very entertaining to watch with all the little creatures running around doing chaotic things.

(Reply to this)

Testicular_Cancer writes:
on Nov 05 2009 01:04 AM

The scariest Christmas movie is 1971's animated "Christmas Carol" featuring the voice of Alastair Sim and directed by Chuck Jones. Despite winning an Oscar it's tough to find--probably because Marley, Ignorance, and Want are so frickin' traumatic.

Second place goes to a single scene: the bit in which Grampa snaps out of his catatonic state to explain the true meaning of Christmas in "Silent Night, Deadly Night." It's an incredibly creepy moment in an otherwise standard-issue holiday slasher.

(Reply to this)

Pseudonym writes:
on Nov 05 2009 01:38 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ph2qpWw7nZI&feature=related

(Reply to this)

lorry y. writes:
on Nov 05 2009 02:02 AM

when you look at the beautiful woman,are you excited now,Gus,there is a convenient way
======Matchcougar.com=====to make you meet some rich woman to help you
you just enter ======Matchcougar.com=====,and it is OK.BE FREE

(Reply to this)

Testicular_Cancer writes:
on Nov 05 2009 02:04 AM

Here, that's what I'm talkin' about:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cPchA7-NNvE

Aw, I was wrong about "A Christmas Carol" in that Chuck Jones produced it; Richard Williams directed. Also on YouTube for the moment.

(Reply to this)

Black Christmas

Bad Santa

Santa With Muscles

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Related Links

Disney's A Christmas Carol

Related Articles

Most Discussed

Latest News

Latest Interviews

Latest Features

Sponsored Links