Movie Review Jackie K Cooper
“The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl” (Dimension Films)

The plot for “The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl” has been attributed to Racer Rodriguez, the ten-year-old son of the movie’s director Robert Rodriguez. Not to be unkind, but this is certainly believable as the script, and entire movie for that matter, falls into the creative range a ten year old would have. The problem is who wants to watch a movie presented at the creative level of a ten-year-old!

“SB & LG” is a disaster from start to finish. From the acting to the sets to the plot to the 3-D gimmick, it starts off badly and goes downhill from there. The “story” starts off with a young boy named Max (Cayden Boyd) getting into trouble at school because he says he has two friends named “Shark Boy” (Taylor Lautner) and “Lava Girl” (Taylor Dooley). His teacher (George Lopez – who will need more than a new kidney to help him survive this fiasco) tries to tell him these are only friends from his dreams.

Then one day Shark Boy and Lava Girl show up at Max’s school and tell him they need help to save the Planet Drool. Off they go on a 3-D adventure that is duller than dirt. Maybe some tiny kids will enjoy it but I can’t imagine who they are. Most four-year-olds are more sophisticated than this.

It is hard to understand why the 3-D angle is still used in movies. The look of the film through the glasses is terrible and the glasses themselves are awkward and annoying. Filming a movie in the 3-D process is anything but a plus.

You can excuse the poor acting on the part of the two Taylor’s and Cayden Boyd. They are just starting their careers and need guidance in being somewhat believable. Robert Rodriguez appears to have dropped the ball there. He just turned on the cameras and let them go. For someone who got enjoyable performances from the kids in “Spy Kids” this is a real step down.

But how do you justify the painfully inept performances by Lopez as well as David Arquette and Kristin Davis as Max’s parents? They act as though they are reading their lines from a teleprompter.

The film is rated PG for mild violence.

In a summer of less than memorable movies this is one of the worst. You really have to wonder why it was made – and for who was it intended? I wasn’t the biggest fan of “Madagascar” but if it came down to a choice of which kiddie movie to see I would go with the wild animals over the super hero kids any day.

I scored “The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl” a waterlogged and non-erupting 2 out of 10.

JKC
www.jackiekcooper.com