American Psycho Quotes

The top American Psycho quotes selected by the Rotten Tomatoes community. Login to submit a quote!

    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?
    – Submitted by Ankur B (2 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm Patrick Bateman.
    – Submitted by Nick R (4 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Look at that subtle off-white coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh, my God. It even has a watermark.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm just a happy camper! Rockin' and a-rollin'!
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Hamilton, have a holly-jolly Christmas.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Hi, this is Paul Allen. I'm being called away to London for a few days. Meredith, I'll call you when I get back. Hasta la vista, baby.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Craig McDermott: Oh, my God. Bateman, do you want me to fry you up some fucking potato pancakes? Some latkes?
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Just cool it with the anti-Semitic remarks.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: 'm on the verge of tears by the time we arrive at Espace, since I'm positive we won't have a decent table. But we do, and relief washes over me in an awesome wave.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Hmm, I see they've omitted the pork loin with lime Jell-O.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Listen, the mud soup and the charcoal arugula are outrageous here.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm into, uh, well, murders and executions, mostly.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Their early work was a little too new wave for my tastes, but when Sports came out in '83, I think they really came into their own, commercially and artistically. The whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost. He's been compared to Elvis Costello, but I think Huey has a far more bitter, cynical sense of humor.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Paul Allen has mistaken me for this dickhead Marcus Halberstram. It seems logical because Marcus also works at P&P and in fact does the same exact thing I do and he also has a penchant for Valentino suits and Oliver Peoples glasses. Marcus and I even go to the same barber, although I have a slightly better haircut.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I have to return some videotapes.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable. I simply am not there.
    – Submitted by Sam F (9 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm in touch with humanity.
    – Submitted by Frances H (15 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory. Although I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand a feel flesh gripping yours, and even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.
    – Submitted by Frances H (15 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Try getting a reservation at Dorsia now, you fucking stupid bastard!
    – Submitted by Diego Ignacio P (16 months ago)
    1. Donald Kimball: Do you remember where you were the night of Paul's disappearance, which was on the 20th of December?
    2. Patrick Bateman: God... I guess I was probably returning videotapes.
    – Submitted by Chris O (17 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm leaving. I've assessed the situation, and I'm going.
    – Submitted by Olive B (18 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I need to return some videotapes.
    – Submitted by David G (18 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Don't touch the watch.
    – Submitted by Bryan O (18 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I can do a thousand now.
    – Submitted by Shen S (18 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Hey Paul!
    – Submitted by Dean F (19 months ago)
    1. Paul Allen: Is that a raincoat?
    2. Patrick Bateman: Yes it is.
    – Submitted by Angela R (19 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Am I being cross examined?
    2. Donald Kimball: Do you feel like you are?
    3. Patrick Bateman: No I don't.
    – Submitted by Chris H (19 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you like Phil Collins?
    – Submitted by Stacey R (19 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I have to return some videotapes.
    – Submitted by Stacey R (19 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I guess you could say I'm a pretty sick guy!
    – Submitted by Cam M (20 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I have to return some videotapes.
    – Submitted by Joe M (20 months ago)
    1. Paul Allen: Is that a raincoat?
    2. Patrick Bateman: Yes it is!
    – Submitted by Joe M (20 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?
    – Submitted by Joe M (20 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Don't just stare at it, eat it.
    – Submitted by Philip B (21 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, I may show up at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.
    – Submitted by Deborah S (21 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: [voiceover] When I get to Paul Allen's place, I use the keys I took from his pocket. There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park and is obviously more expensive than mine. I calm myself and move into the bedroom, where I find his suitcase and start to pack.
    – Submitted by Grant H (22 months ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you know what Ed Gein said about women?
    2. David Van Patten: Ed Gein? The maitre 'd at Canal Bar?
    3. Patrick Bateman: No, serial killer, Wisconsin, the '50s.
    4. Craig McDermott: So what did he say?
    5. Patrick Bateman: 'When I see a pretty girl walking down the street, I think two things. One part wants me to take her out, talk to her, be real nice and sweet and treat her right.'
    6. David Van Patten: And what did the other part think?
    7. Patrick Bateman: 'What her head would look like on a stick... ' [laughs]
    – Submitted by Grant H (22 months ago)
    1. Paul Allen: Hey Halberstram.
    2. Patrick Bateman: Yes, Allen?
    3. Paul Allen: Why are their copies of the style section all over the place, d-do you have a dog? A little chow or something?
    4. Patrick Bateman: No, Allen.
    5. Paul Allen: Is that a raincoat?
    6. Patrick Bateman: Yes it is! In '87, Huey released this, Fore, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip to be Square", a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity, and the importance of trends, it's also a personal statement about the band itself. [raises axe above head]
    7. Paul Allen: Hey Paul! [he bashes Allen in the head with the axe, and blood splatters over him] TRY GETTING A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW YOU FUCKING STUPID BASTARD! YOU, FUCKING BASTARD!
    – Submitted by Patrick B (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Do you like Huey Lewis and The News?
    2. Paul Allen: They're okay.
    3. Patrick Bateman: Their early work was a little too new wave for my tastes, but when Sports came out in '83, I think they really came into their own, commercially and artistically. The whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost. He's been compared to Elvis Costello, but I think Huey has a far much more bitter, cynical sense of humor.
    – Submitted by Patrick B (2 years ago)
    1. Evelyn Williams: Where are you going?
    2. Patrick Bateman: I am just leaving.
    3. Evelyn Williams: But where?
    4. Patrick Bateman: I have to return some videotapes.
    – Submitted by Patrick B (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?
    – Submitted by Patrick B (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: You're a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood.
    – Submitted by Patrick B (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I'm into... Well murders and executions.
    – Submitted by Tom V (2 years ago)
    1. Jean: What's that?
    2. Patrick Bateman: Duct tape. I need it for .. taping something.
    3. Jean: Patrick, have you ever wanted to make someone happy? [sets dirty spoon on table]
    4. Patrick Bateman: No! Put it in the carton!
    5. Jean: Sorry!
    6. Patrick Bateman: [pause] Jean? .. What?
    7. Jean: Make someone happy .. have you ever wanted too?
    8. Patrick Bateman: [walks around behind her] looking for, uh .. [holds nail gun up to the back of her head] I guess you could say I just want to have a meaningful relationship with someone special.
    9. Jean: Hmm .. [phone rings]
    – Submitted by Cheyne L (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: You like Phil Collins? Been a big Genesis fan, ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand, any of their work, too artsy, too intellectual .. It was on Duke, where, uh, Phil Collins presence became more apparent .. I think "Invisible Touch" is the group's undisputed masterpiece .. It's an epic meditation on intangibility .. at the same time it deepens and enriches the meaning of the proceeding three albums .. Christy, take off the robe .. listen the to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins, and Rutherford, you can practically hear every nuance of every instrument .. Sabrina, remove your dress .. in terms of lyrical craftsmanship and sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism .. Sabrina, why don't you dance a little .. take the lyrics to 'Land of Confusion", in this song Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority .. "In Too Deep", is the most moving pop song of the 1980s about monogamy and commitment .. the song is extremely uplifting, the lyrics are as positive and affirmative as, uh, anything I've heard in rock .. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole .. Phil Collins solo career, seems to be more commercial, and therefore more satisfying in a narrower way, especially songs like, 'In The Air Tonight' and, uh, 'Against All Odds' .. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it .. but I also think, Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and i stress the word, artist .. this is 'Susudeo', a great, great song, a personal favorite ..
    – Submitted by Cheyne L (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, I may show up at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.
    – Submitted by Rocky F (2 years ago)
    1. Paul Allen: No can do! I got an eight thirty res at Dorsia .. Great sea urchin seviche!
    – Submitted by Cheyne L (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?
    – Submitted by Jake W (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I have to return some video tapes.
    – Submitted by Megan O (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Try getting a reservation at Dorsia now you f**king bastard! You, f**king bastard! !!
    – Submitted by Ethan H (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: [Bateman narrating] I'm trying to listen to the new Robert Palmer tape, but Evelyn, my supposed fiancee, keeps buzzing in my ear.
    – Submitted by Paul S (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Sabrina, don't just stare at it. Eat it.
    – Submitted by Cori J (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: Not if you want to keep your spleen.
    – Submitted by Cori J (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping you and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there.
    – Submitted by Alex A (2 years ago)
    1. Patrick Bateman: I Have to return some videotapes......
    – Submitted by Alex A (2 years ago)

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