Argento's Dracula 3D (2013)
Average Rating: 3.1/10
Reviews Counted: 24
Fresh: 2 | Rotten: 22
No consensus yet.
Average Rating: 3/10
Critic Reviews: 6
Fresh: 0 | Rotten: 6
No consensus yet.
liked it
Average Rating: 2/5
User Ratings: 1,086
Movie Info
Horror master Dario Argento returns with a bloody, luridly creepy 3D version of the classic vampire tale, drenched in gore and sex. An unsuspecting Englishman arrives in Transylvania, lured by a job with a local nobleman. But the undead Count Dracula's real target is the man's innocent young wife. Featuring the iconic Rutger Hauer as vampire hunter Van Helsing and the inimitable Asia Argento (the director's own daughter) as a local all-too-eager to fall under the Count's sway. (c) IFC Midnight
Oct 4, 2013 Limited
IFC Midnight
- Official Site
Watch It Now
Cast
-
Thomas Kretschmann
Dracula -
Asia Argento
Lucy -
Marta Gastini
Mina -
Rutger Hauer
Van Helsing -
Unax Ugalde
Jonathan Harker -
Miriam Giovanelli
Tania -
Maria Cristina Helle...
Jarmila -
Augusto Zucchi
Andrej Kisslinger -
Franco Ravera
Priest -
Francesco Rossini
Lieut. Delbruck -
Giovanni Franzoni
Reinfeld -
Giuseppe Loconsole
Zoran -
Riccardo Cicogna
Janek -
Christian Burruano
Milos -
Eugenio Allegri
Innkeeper -
Nicola Baldoni
Smith -
Alma Noce
Marika -
Luca Fonte
Soldier 1 -
Marco Mancia
Soldier 2 -
Toni Pandolfo
Stationmaster -
Simona Romagnoli
Innkeeper's Wife
ADVERTISEMENT
All Critics (24) | Top Critics (6) | Fresh (2) | Rotten (22)
When insects are the best thing in your movie, it's probably time to retire.
Argento ... brings enough moments of kinky madness to his not-great "Dracula" to indicate there may yet be greatness lurking within him. Here's hoping.
Some viewers will get unintended jollies from a gigantic, rampaging grasshopper; others, from the director's queasy-making penchant for unclothing his exhibitionist daughter Asia.
Unfortunately, Argento never acknowledges he's in on the joke, nor is the film quite ridiculous enough for us to coast enjoyably on derision.
Director Argento half-heartedly mixes schlocky 3D f/x with one-dimensional characters for a near-two-hour joke that ought to have been funnier.
Utterly lacking in imagination or suspense, this inane effort is strictly for hardcore Argento cultists.
Through 3D glasses too darkly, the extra dimension is not taken advantage of -- and in fact appears detrimental.
John Carpenter once called (Argento) his greatest influence. After this, he is surely his biggest disappointment.
... perfect for a living room full of inebriated hecklers to have their way with it... you'll never look at a praying mantis the same way ever again.
With Dracula 3D, we finally know which of the great '70s genre filmmakers have fallen the hardest, and the answer is Dario Argento.
Argento's Dracula 3D is an absolute travesty of a film completely devoid of creativity or imagination. It's like taking your favorite folklore, stripping it of everything you love, making it as dull as possible, and then lighting it on fire.
goes completely bonkers by taking the powers of Dracula to a ridiculous level
As he did with his adaptation of "Phantom of the Opera," Argento offers up a version that plays like a choppy condensation based on hazy memories of the book, then augments it with nudity and gore.
From the opening credit sequence using a ridiculous score that sounds more at home in a B-sci-fi film from the 50s to the special effects that were done by the lowest bidder, you know you're going to be in store for something that's sub-par.
It's a stain on Dracula's good name, and a waste of time for even those looking for the cheapest of vampiric thrills.
A flaccid retelling of Bram Stoker's immortal tale of monstrous obsession, reduced here to a filmed community theater rehearsal with Full Sail freshman visual effects.
Argento strands his actors in a variety of crummy master shots and close-ups that accentuate their every exaggerated gesture and line-reading.
Argento's reputation as a horror maestro is not enhanced with this flabby and flailing movie.
I really hate that I'm making this pun, but Dracula 3D doesn't suck any blood - it just sucks.
The film is dispiriting because there's virtually no sign of Dario Argento in it, nor of any novel motivation to mount yet another version of an oft-told tale.
Audience Reviews for Argento's Dracula 3D
Super Reviewer
Dracula 3D started with a screen text that claim its "significantly important". Yes, because any movie that has Dracula turning into a wolf, an owl, dozen of flies, and giant praying mantis (picture at the end) without explanation is very "important". This is the kind of "significant" horror film that only amateur Dario Argento could make...wait. According to his resume Argento is responsible for the original "Dawn of the Dead" and "Suspiria" which are both consider horror classics. Huh? Guess that makes this failure even more embarrassing given the director is a veteran of the film industry and the horror genre.
So in terms of plot it does nothing new with the familiar Dracula mythos which at this point has been done death. It's about as interesting as watching a snail paint a wall and then watching it dry. It's generic storytelling at it most dull made even worse in eye drowsy 3D! For starter things are too bright! The lightning makes it difficult to see anything with 3D glasses. It falls victim to using the usual gimmicks of 3D that annoy us. What makes matter worse is the fact that director Argento made it impossible at times for the viewer to focus on a scene when the shot itself lacks focus.
Another thing is the nudity serves no purpose. You can't enjoy the nudity either in 3D for the director has filmed his daughter naked. I haven't felt this wrong seeing a naked woman since "Butterfly" (1981) and I hated the living essence of that film. Though to Dracula 3D credit, it's nowhere as awful as "Butterfly" (1981). Some highlight includes Dracula killing people with his finger nails, rare cheesy acting, and the giant praying mantis. Also, in what novel does Dracula has the ability to teleport, mind control, and also telekinesis. The "action" scenes that last seconds (the longest almost reaching 10) here are more poorly choreograph than a Steven Seagal fight scene.
The acting is all around awful. The 3D is useless making it you more sleepy than invested. This puts no creativity on a tire story that has been told dozens of better times. The worst offender being it's the worst kind of bad movie; the ones feel like a chore to finish.
[IMG]https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/483813_356361034480831_1884420032_n.jpg[/IMG]
Super Reviewer
Discussion Forum
| Topic | Last Post | Replies |
|---|---|---|
| This one looks better than the Francis Ford Coppola version | 1 day ago | 5 |
| Guess the Tomatometer | 2 days ago | 2 |
| Has some of the best cgi I've ever seen in a movie | 1 day ago | 2 |
| This looks like... | 6 days ago | 0 |
What's Hot On RT
New Desolation of Smaug trailer!
Naomi Watts is Princess Di
Gravity sets new record
Trailer for a squirrely heist flick
See what's on TV tonight
Latest News on Argento's Dracula 3D
October 4, 2013:
Critics Consensus: Gravity is Certified FreshThis week at the movies, we've got stranded astronauts (Gravity, starring Sandra Bullock and George...
Featured on RT
- NYFF: Joaquin Phoenix and James Gray talk The Immigrant 0
- Box Office Guru Wrapup: Gravity Stuns with Record $55M Launch 27
- Primetime Preview: Witches of East End, Once Upon a Time and More 1
- Weekly Ketchup: Disney Plans Live Action Cruella de Vil Movie 34
- Primetime Preview: Last Man Standing, The Neighbors and More 5
- Critics Consensus: Gravity is Certified Fresh 68
- Parental Guidance: Gravity and Parkland 2
Top Headlines
Foreign Titles
- The Wedding Ringer (DE)
- The Wedding Ringer (UK)



Top Critic