Critics Consensus: Titans Is Not A Kraken Good Time
Plus, The Last Song hits a sour note, and guess Why Did I Get Married Too's Tomatometer!
The original Clash of the Titans was campy, goofy, and plenty of fun -- partly because of the charmingly lo-fi special effects. However, critics say the big-budget remake lacks the joie de vivre of the original, and it makes poor use of its strong cast and its post-production 3D. Sam Worthington stars as Perseus, a demi-god who embarks on a journey to stop Hades (Ralph Fiennes) from conquering Zeus (Liam Neeson). Along the way, demons are slain and Krakens are released. The pundits say this is an unfortunately somber affair, in which great actors are given the silliest dialogue in many a moon and the CGI effects overwhelm the storytelling. (Check out this week's Total Recall, in which we count down star Liam Neeson's best-reviewed movies.)
Miley Cyrus can't play Hannah Montana forever, so what better way to take baby steps toward an adult film career is there than starring in a Nicholas Sparks movie? Unfortunately, critics say Cyrus' showcase, The Last Song, is a bland, bloodless weepie that overdoses on melodrama and musical montages. Cyrus stars as a teenager spending the summer with her estranged father (Greg Kinnear). Will she learn to love her father? Will she meet a hunky guy? Will tragedy strike? The pundits say The Last Song hits all the typical marks of a Sparks yarn, but its drama is perfunctory and Cyrus brings little to the table beyond likeability.
At this point, we know the drill: a new Tyler Perry movie gets released without being screened for critics beforehand and goes on to make truckloads of money despite mixed-to-negative reviews. We're predicting the director's latest, Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married Too will follow the same pattern. Kids, it's time to play Guess the Tomatometer!
Also opening this week in limited release:
- The Sun Behind the Clouds, a documentary about China's rule over Tibet, is at 86 percent.
- The Warlords, starring Jet Li in an epic period piece of war and romance in 1870s China, is at 61 percent.
- The Greatest, starring Pierce Brosnan and Susan Sarandon in a drama about a couple dealing with the death of their son, is at 60 percent.
- Leaves of Grass, starring Edward Norton (in a dual role) and Keri Russell in the tale of an Ivy League professor who reconnects with his pothead twin, is at 56 percent.
- Don McKay, starring Thomas Haden Church in a neo-noir about a man returning to his hometown to find things amiss, is at 46 percent.