The formidable technical skills in The Country Bears must not be allowed to distract from the film's terminal inanity.
| Original Score: 2/4
The Mark Perez script lacks the clever humor and odd twists that can help a family film transcend age.
It's mildly amusing, but I certainly can't recommend it.
Disney's first attempt to make a Disney World attraction into a film (the haunted mansion and Pirates of the Caribbean are soon to follow) isn't great, but it's surprisingly unwretched.
| Original Score: C
| Original Score: 1/5
...a plotline that's as lumpy as two-day old porridge...the filmmakers' paws, sad to say, were all over this "un-bear-able" project!
| Original Score: 1.5/4
An outdated, Chuck E. Cheese-quality Disneyland attraction...turn it into a trite, cliche-packed embarrassment of a feature film.
The whole talking-animal thing is grisly.
Is it really an advantage to invest such subtlety and warmth in an animatronic bear when the humans are acting like puppets?
The plot combines The Blues Brothers and Almost Famous (but with bears, and a G rating), with an excruciating dollop of Disney sentimentality mixed in for good measure.
| Original Score: 2/5
After a while, the only way for a reasonably intelligent person to get through The Country Bears is to ponder how a whole segment of pop-music history has been allowed to get wet, fuzzy and sticky.
This ingrown mutant is easily the most bizarre children's film made in this country since 1982's lab-rat apocalypse The Secret of NIMH.
How good can a movie be when it's based on an attraction at Disney World - The Country Bear Jamboree? The answer is not very good.
Bears is bad. Not 'terrible filmmaking' bad, but more like, 'I once had a nightmare like this, and it's now coming true' bad.
Functions more as a product than a movie.
| Original Score: 1.5/5
...all about concept and nothing about forethought; it walks and talks like an endearing fable, bankrupt of the realization that it can be creepy and unsettling on the eyes.
The film delivers what's expected of it, but unfortunately that's not much.
| Original Score: 3.5/10
It's fitting that a movie as artificial and soulless as The Country Bears owes its genesis to an animatronic display at Disneyland.
It's like an all-star salute to Disney's cheesy commercialism.
| Original Score: 3/5
I want to make a lame joke that ends with Does a bear crap in the woods?, but all the bear crap is up on the screen.