Opening

44% Sin City: A Dame to Kill For Aug 22
36% If I Stay Aug 22
29% When The Game Stands Tall Aug 22
4% Are You Here Aug 22
95% Love Is Strange Aug 22

Top Box Office

21% Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles $28.5M
92% Guardians of the Galaxy $25.1M
14% Let's Be Cops $17.8M
35% The Expendables 3 $15.9M
31% The Giver $12.3M
20% Into The Storm $7.9M
66% The Hundred-Foot Journey $7.2M
64% Lucy $5.5M
41% Step Up: All In $2.7M
62% Hercules $2.1M

Coming Soon

0% The November Man Aug 27
98% Starred Up Aug 27
—— As Above/So Below Aug 29
85% The Congress Aug 29
—— The Calling Aug 29

New Episodes Tonight

100% Defiance: Season 2
100% Garfunkel and Oates: Season 1
88% The Honorable Woman: Season 1
56% Married: Season 1
95% Rectify: Season 2
—— Rookie Blue: Season 5
39% Rush: Season 1
82% Satisfaction: Season 1
82% Welcome to Sweden: Season 1
41% Working the Engels: Season 1
77% You're the Worst: Season 1

Discuss Last Night's Shows

86% The Bridge (FX): Season 2
91% The Divide: Season 1
83% Extant: Season 1
—— Franklin & Bash: Season 4
—— Graceland: Season 2
—— Hot in Cleveland: Season 5
57% Legends: Season 1
—— Motive: Season 2
69% Mystery Girls: Season 1
100% Suits: Season 4
38% Taxi Brooklyn: Season 1
43% Young & Hungry: Season 1

Certified Fresh TV

86% The Bridge (FX): Season 2
83% Extant: Season 1
88% The Honorable Woman: Season 1
86% The Knick: Season 1
89% Manhattan: Season 1
97% Masters of Sex: Season 2
73% Murder in the First: Season 1
89% Outlander: Season 1
82% Satisfaction: Season 1
87% The Strain: Season 1
82% Welcome to Sweden: Season 1
77% You're the Worst: Season 1

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra Reviews

Page 1 of 8
Simon Miraudo
Quickflix

Here comes GI Joe, a film so loud and dumb it makes Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen look like a Mike Leigh docudrama.

Full Review Source: Quickflix | Original Score: 2/5

October 27, 2010
Mike Barnard
Future Movies UK

If G. I. Joe was a Saturday morning television cartoon lasting 45 minutes it would be far more palatable, but as a full-length feature film it's too much of a no-brainer.

Full Review Source: Future Movies UK | Original Score: 5/10

August 7, 2009
Adam Tobias
Watertown Daily Times

So, now you know, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is about as uncomfortable to sit through as running in a marathon with a bad case of the trots - and knowing is half the battle.

Full Review Source: Watertown Daily Times | Original Score: 1.5/5

August 14, 2009
Gina Carbone
Seacoast Newspapers (NH/Maine)

Worst 'blockbuster' of the summer.

Full Review Source: Seacoast Newspapers (NH/Maine) | Original Score: 2/4

August 8, 2009
Roger Moore
Orlando Sentinel
Top Critic IconTop Critic

It's dumb. It's digital. It's derivative. This Joe, scripted at a toy-selling TV-cartoon level, is a non-stop shoot-em-up edited to induce seizures.

Full Review Source: Orlando Sentinel | Original Score: 2/5

August 7, 2009
Sam Bathe
Fan The Fire

G.I. Joe: Rise Of Cobra is a very throwaway experience, likely to be forgotten by the film world very quickly.

Full Review Source: Fan The Fire | Original Score: 2/5

April 15, 2010
Roger Ebert
Chicago Sun-Times
Top Critic IconTop Critic

It is sure to be enjoyed by those whose movie appreciation is defined by the ability to discern that moving pictures and sound are being employed to depict violence.

Full Review Source: Chicago Sun-Times | Original Score: 2/4

August 9, 2009
James Berardinelli
ReelViews
Top Critic IconTop Critic

There's an expectation that the audience will be invested in the relationship between Duke and Ana, but the poor writing and lack of chemistry between the principals fails to sell the romance as anything more substantial than a weak plot element.

Full Review Source: ReelViews | Original Score: 2/4

August 11, 2009
Michael Phillips
Chicago Tribune
Top Critic IconTop Critic

[Director] Sommers did the first two chaotic Mummy remakes; those play like Tender Mercies compared to this one.

Full Review Source: Chicago Tribune | Original Score: 2/4

August 14, 2009
Simon Foster
sbs.com.au

As is usually the case, the seething bad guys make for far more "interesting" onscreen characters than the heroes.

Full Review Source: sbs.com.au

August 9, 2010
David Foucher
EDGE Boston

The real reason Paramount Pictures didn't screen "G.I. Joe" for critics: they were afraid of reviews like this one.

Full Review Source: EDGE Boston | Original Score: D-

August 12, 2009
Anders Wotzke
Moviedex

A lively, yet tedious, assault on the senses.

Full Review Source: Moviedex | Original Score: 1/5

August 6, 2009
Tim Nagle
Times [UK]

It is impossible to care for the Joes, so cursory is their characterisation, so bland are the actors. It is all so uninvolving, and for that the computer-generated effects are greatly to blame.

Full Review Source: Times [UK] | Original Score: 1/5

August 11, 2009
Mike Scott
Times-Picayune

A predictable actioner built on big booms, a few one-liners and a major assist from CG department, there are few surprises, few nuances, very little reasoning -- and some distractingly bad acting.

Full Review Source: Times-Picayune | Original Score: 2/4

August 7, 2009
James Rocchi
Common Sense Media

Too violent for kids, too childish for grown-ups.

Full Review Source: Common Sense Media | Original Score: 1/5

August 7, 2009
Jeffrey Bloomer
Paste Magazine

The movie is finally just too frivolous to elicit any real reaction, bemusement, anger, whatever. It's almost quaint.

Full Review Source: Paste Magazine | Original Score: 30/100

August 10, 2009
Tom Meek
Boston Phoenix

If only they'd brought Mr. Potato Head into the mix.

Full Review Source: Boston Phoenix | Original Score: 1.5/4

August 14, 2009
Chris Hewitt (St. Paul)
St. Paul Pioneer Press

Lots of things never become clear in "G.I.," which is so busy setting up a sequel that it doesn't even tell us what has become of two of the three main bad guys.

Full Review Source: St. Paul Pioneer Press | Original Score: 2/4

August 7, 2009
Robbie Collin
News of the World

G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobblers, as it must now be known, is a 118-minute war crime that does for the army what Steve Martin's Inspector Clouseau did for the French police force - except with more fake-looking explosions.

Full Review Source: News of the World | Original Score: 1/5

August 7, 2009
Chris Barsanti
Filmcritic.com

a so utterly disposable comic-book film that one forgets it before it ends

Full Review Source: Filmcritic.com | Original Score: 2/5

August 7, 2009
Page 1 of 8
Find us on:                     
Help | About | Jobs | Critics Submission | Press | API | Licensing | Mobile