Home Alone Quotes

The top Home Alone quotes selected by the Rotten Tomatoes community. Login to submit a quote!

  • Megan McCallister:
    You're not at all worried that something might happen to Kevin?
    Buzz McCallister:
    No, for three reason: A, I'm not that lucky. Two, we use smoke detectors and D, we live on the most boring street in the whole United States of America, where nothing even remotely dangerous will happen. Period.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (6 months ago)

  • Harry:
    Marv?
    Marv:
    Harry?
    Harry:
    Why the hell did you take your shoes off?
    Marv:
    Why the hell are you dressed like a chicken?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (18 months ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    Hi! I'm calling from Paris. My son's home alone.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (19 months ago)

  • Harry:
    Do we wanna come back tomorrow?
    Marv:
    Yeah?
    Harry:
    Let's get outta here before someone sees us?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (19 months ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    When do you guys come back?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (19 months ago)

  • Marley:
    You can say hello when you see me. You don't have to be afraid.
    ‐ Submitted by Joe N (2 years ago)

  • Marv:
    The window?
    Harry:
    Yeah.
    Marv:
    I'm not going out the window.
    Harry:
    What are ya scared of Marv? Are you afraid?
    ‐ Submitted by Joe N (2 years ago)

  • Harry:
    Were did he go?
    Marv:
    Maybe he committed suicide.
    ‐ Submitted by Connor N (2 years ago)

  • Fuller:
    Kevin, your such a disease.
    ‐ Submitted by Connor N (2 years ago)

  • Buzz McCallister:
    I wouldn't let you sleep in my room, if you were growing, on my ass!
    ‐ Submitted by Connor N (2 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    This is it. Dont get scared now.
    ‐ Submitted by Ronalds J (2 years ago)

  • French Ticket Agent:
    I can get you on a standby.
    ‐ Submitted by Katherine R (2 years ago)

  • Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Keep the change, ya filthy animal!
    ‐ Submitted by I Am The Vast UNIVERSE I (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    Hey!, I'm not afraid anymore. I said I'm not afraid anymore. Do you hear me. I'm not afraid anymore.
    Marley:
    [approaching Kevin]
    Kevin McCallister:
    [screams as he runs back inside and he screams like a maniac]
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Peter McCallister:
    [talking to Kate while she's on the phone] Hey, honey, did I pick up the apater.
    Kate McCallister:
    No? I didn't have time to do that?
    Peter McCallister:
    What am I supposed to shave in France?
    Kate McCallister:
    Grow a goatee?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    Buzz, I'm going through your private stuff, you better come out and pound me?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [picks up Buzz's fireworks] Wow, fireworks. I'll save these for later.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [talking to the Scranton ticket agent] This is *Christmas*. The season has the perputal hope. I don't care that I have to get out on your runway and hitchike. It costs me everything I own. I have to sell my soul to the devil himself. I am going to get home to my son?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [talking to the Scranton ticket agent] I have been awake for almost sixty hours, I have been to Chicago to Paris to Dallas to... Where the hell am I?
    Scranton Ticket Agent:
    Scranton?
    Kate McCallister:
    I'm trying to get home to my eight years old son and now I'm this close, you're telling me it's hopeless!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    KEVIN!!!!
    ‐ Submitted by Bobby J (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    How can we forget this? We forgot him?
    Peter McCallister:
    We didn't forget him? We just miscounted?
    Kate McCallister:
    What kind of mother am I?
    Uncle Frank:
    It makes you feel any better? I forgot my reading glasses?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [his mother drags him out of the kitchen after the fight] Why do I get treated like scum!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Lineman:
    [talking to Kate as she is about to hop in the airport van] Excuse me, ma'am. I just wanted to let you know that your power is fixed. The phones are just a mess. It will take Ma Bell especially around the holidays?
    Kate McCallister:
    [without really listening] Okay, thanks!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [shouts after she hits the clock and picks up her watch] PETER!
    Kate McCallister:
    We slept in.
    Peter McCallister:
    We slept in.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    Kids are afraid of the dark.
    French Ticket Agent:
    You're afraid of the dark.
    ‐ Submitted by Angie F (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    Did I turn off the coffee?
    Peter McCallister:
    No? I did?
    Kate McCallister:
    Did you lock up?
    Peter McCallister:
    Yeah?
    Kate McCallister:
    Did we set the timers on the lights?
    Peter McCallister:
    Yeah?
    Kate McCallister:
    Did you close the close the garage?
    Peter McCallister:
    That's it, I forgot to close the garage, that's it?
    Kate McCallister:
    No?, that's not it?
    Peter McCallister:
    And who else will we be forgetting?
    Kate McCallister:
    [she jumps up right after she pauses] Kevin!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    Can I sleep in your room? I don't wanna sleep on a hide-a-bed with Fuller. If he has something to drink, he'll wet the bed.
    Buzz McCallister:
    I wouldn't let you sleep in my room? If you were growing on my ass!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [walks in Buzz's bedroom as he approaches Buzz] Buzz...
    Buzz McCallister:
    Do you know how to knock plem-wad!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    Where are the passports and tickets?
    Peter McCallister:
    I put them in the microwave to dry them off?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Marv:
    [the two burgulars arrive at the McCallister household at 9:00p.m.] How do you wanna get in?
    Harry:
    Maybe the kid will let us in. You never know?
    Marv:
    He's a kid. Kids are stupid?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    I made my family dissapear?
    Kevin McCallister:
    [thinks backs to family members that had told him the night before]
    Megan McCallister:
    Kevin, you're heavenly helpless?
    Linnie McCallister:
    You know, Kevin, you're what the french call les incomplent.
    Buzz McCallister:
    Kevin, I'm going to feed you to my tartulula.
    Jeff McCallister:
    Kevin, you are a *such* a disease.
    Kate McCallister:
    There are fifteen people in the house, you're the only one who has to make trouble.
    Uncle Frank:
    Look what you *did* you little jerk!
    Kevin McCallister:
    [gleefully] I made my family dissapear?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    I hope you're all drinking milk, I wanna get rid of it.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Marv:
    [the McCallister household is filled with supposed partygoers, music is blasting] Did they come back?
    Harry:
    From *Paris*?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Aunt Leslie:
    [talking to Fuller as he drinks his Pepsi] Fuller, go easy on the Pepsi?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [talking on the phone and Kevin jumps up on the bed] No?, we're not bringing the dog, we took him to the kennel.... Hey, hey, hey, get off. Kevin, out of the room?.
    Kevin McCallister:
    Hang up the phone and make me, why don't you?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [walking in his parents' bedroom and his mother is talking on the phone] Mom?, Uncle Frank won't let me watch the movie but the big kids can. Why can't I?
    Kate McCallister:
    Kevin, I'm on the phone.
    Kevin McCallister:
    It's not rated R. He's being such a jerk?
    Kate McCallister:
    Kevin, if Uncle Frank says no, it must be really bad.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [picks up Buzz's Playboy magazine and then tosses it to the floor] No clothes on anybody. Snickering.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [stands on the stairwell] Everyone in this family hates me!.
    Kate McCallister:
    Then you should ask Santa for the new family.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I don't want another family, I don't want any family. Familes suck!.
    Kate McCallister:
    Just stay up there. I don't wanna see you again for the rest of the night.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I don't wanna see you again for the rest of my whole life. I don't wanna see anybody else either.
    Kate McCallister:
    I hope you don't mean it. You feel pretty sad that wake up tomorrow morning and you don't have a family.
    Kevin McCallister:
    No?, I wouldn't?.
    Kate McCallister:
    Then say that again. Maybe it will happen.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I hope I'll never see any of you jerks again.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    [barges through the kitchen door after his head has blow-torched] Where are you, you little CREEP!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Marv:
    [stares at the house as he is about to crawl into the window]Harry, I'm comin' in.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Airline Counter Person:
    Hi!
    Kate McCallister:
    Did we miss the flight?
    Airline Counter Person:
    No, you just made it.
    Kate McCallister:
    Yeah?
    Airline Counter Person:
    [open the gate door] Have a merry christmas and have a great flight. Bye?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [prays for his macaroni & cheese] Bless this highly nutrious macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold on sale. Amen.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    [talking to Kevin after he got hit by a van in the driveway] Hey, hey! You better watch out for that traffic, son. You know.
    Kevin McCallister:
    Sorry?
    Harry:
    Damn!
    Marv:
    [talking to Kevin] Santy don't visit funeral homes, little buddy?
    Harry:
    Okay, okay? Merry Christmas.
    Harry:
    [smiles and his tooth glistens. Kevin gasps]
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Brook:
    [talking to her mother] Mom, can Santa go through customs?
    Fuller:
    [talking to his father] What time do we have to go to bed?
    Uncle Frank:
    [talking to Fuller] Early? We are leaving at eight a.m.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Check Out Girl:
    Where's your mom?
    Kevin McCallister:
    My mom's in the car?
    Check Out Girl:
    Where's your father?
    Kevin McCallister:
    He's at work?
    Check Out Girl:
    What about your brothers and sisters?
    Kevin McCallister:
    I'm an only child?
    Check Out Girl:
    Where do you live?
    Kevin McCallister:
    I can't tell you that?
    Check Out Girl:
    Why not?
    Kevin McCallister:
    Because you're a stranger?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    Runs out of the house and sees two cars that are parked in the garage) The cars are here, they didn't go to the airport.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Airport Driver:
    [knocks on the door while the linemen are fixing the phone lines] She said eight o'clock sharp!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    [opening lines at the beginning of the movie] Hey, hey, hey, hey...
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Buzz McCallister:
    [last lines] Kevin, what did you do to my room?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    [sees Kevin in front of the church] No, we're not going to church?
    Marv:
    Me either?
    Harry:
    Let's get out of here?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    The third floor.
    Kate McCallister:
    Go.
    Kevin McCallister:
    It's scary up there.
    Kate McCallister:
    Don't be silly. Fuller will be up in a little while.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I don't wanna sleep with Fuller. You know about him, he wets the bed, he'll pee all over me, I know it.
    Kate McCallister:
    [looks disgusted] Fine. We'll put him somewhere else.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Johnny 1st Gangster:
    [Kevin drops the money from the door hatch and then turns the television back on] Keep the change you filthy animal.
    Pizza Boy:
    Cheapskate?
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Hey!, I'm gonna you the count of ten, to get your ugly, yella, no-kester off my property. Before I pump your gull of lead. One, two, ten.
    Pizza Boy:
    [runs from the house, gets back in his car and drives away]
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Pizza Boy:
    [knocks on the door]
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Who is it?
    Pizza Boy:
    It's Little Nero's, sir. I have your pizza.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Leave it on the doorstep and get the hell outta here.
    Pizza Boy:
    Ok?, but, what about the money?
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    What money.
    Pizza Boy:
    Well, you have to pay for your pizza, sir.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    How much do I owe you?
    Pizza Boy:
    That'll be $1.80, sir.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Heather:
    [talking to the kids as she points to the van and then points to to the other van] Half in this van, half in that van?
    Mitch Murphy:
    [waves to the McCallisters as they hop in the airport vans] Have a good trip, bring me back some French?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    What do you mean?
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    He's upstairs takin' a bath. He'll call when he gets out.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    [pulls out the gun] Hey!, I think I'm gonna give you, Snakes. I'm gonna give you the count of ten, to get your ugly, yella, no-kester off my property, before I pump your gull of lead?
    Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    [wide eyed] All right, Johnny, I'm sorry. I'm goin'.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    One, two, ten.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    [starts unloading bullets into snakes while he laughs]
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Keep the change you filty animal.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Johnny 1st Gangster:
    [hears Snakes knock on the door] Who is it?
    Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    [walks in Johnny's office] It's me, Snakes. I got the stuff.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Leave it on the doorstep and get the hell out of here.
    Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    All right, Johnny, but, what about my money.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    What money.
    Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    Acey said you had some dough for me.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    How much do I owe you.
    Snakes 2nd Gangster:
    Acey said 100%.
    Johnny 1st Gangster:
    Too bad. Acey ain't in charge no more.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [talking to Kevin after he fights with Buzz over the pizza] Look, stop, stop. What is the matter with you?
    Kevin McCallister:
    [points to Buzz] He started it. He ate my pizza on purpobe. He knows I hate sausages and onions and olives and...
    Uncle Frank:
    [wipes the drink from his pants] Look what you did you little jerk!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Marv:
    [shouts after he jumps in the window and steps on the ornaments] I'm gonna kill that kid!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Herb Drugstore Clerk:
    [Kevin moves away from Old Man Marley and the desk as he steals the toothbrush] Honey, you have to pay for the toothbrush. Son, you have to pay it please. Son, son. Danny, stop that boy!
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [drags Kevin as she sends him to the third floor] There are fifteen people in this house you're the only one who has to make trouble.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I'm the only one getting dumped on.
    Kate McCallister:
    You're the only one acting up. Now get upstairs.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I am upstairs dummy.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Heather:
    [sees the kids run around the house as they prepare for the airport] Where are you going. Are you gonna miss the flight?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [looking at the Little Nero's pizza box after the pizza boy runs away and gets back in his car and drives away] A lovely cheese pizza just for me.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Check Out Girl:
    Are you here all by yourself?
    Kevin McCallister:
    Ma'am, I'm eight years old, do you think I'd be here *alone*. I don't think so?.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Peter McCallister:
    [picks up Harry's lost tooth that fell out of his mouth the night before christmas] Honey, what's this?
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Marv:
    [high pitched scream]
    ‐ Submitted by Emil (3 years ago)

  • Officer Devereux:
    Hey, you know we've been looking for you two guys for a long time. You guys are always leaving the water running whenever you break in, now we know each and every house you guys have hit.
    Marv:
    Yeah. But remember, we're the wet bandits. The wet bandits. W-E-T.
    Harry:
    [shouting] Shut up.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    [talking to Heather as the kids run around the house] Heather, did you count heads?
    Megan McCallister:
    Eleven, including me. Five boys, six girls, four parents, two drivers, and a partridge in a pear tree.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [sees the burgulars' van after he shoplifted from the store] I thought the Murphys went to Florida.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    [talking to Kate as she drags Kevin upstairs] Don't worry about me. I spoke with your husband already, and don't worry about your home. It's in good hands.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kate McCallister:
    Kevin, get upstairs right now?
    Kevin McCallister:
    Why?
    Rod:
    Kevin, you're such a disease?
    Kevin McCallister:
    Shut up!
    Peter McCallister:
    Kevin, upstairs.
    Kate McCallister:
    Say goodnight Kevin.
    Kevin McCallister:
    'Goodnight, Kevin'.
    ‐ Submitted by Alyssa B (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    [preparing to meet bandits and loading the rifle] This is it! Don't get scared now!
    ‐ Submitted by Maximus D (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    Why the hell did you take your shoes off?
    Marv:
    Why the hell are you dressed like a chicken?
    ‐ Submitted by Maximus D (3 years ago)

  • Harry:
    Where did he go?
    Marv:
    Maybe he committed suicide.
    Kevin McCallister:
    I'm over here you big horse's ass, come and get me before I call the police.
    ‐ Submitted by Maximus D (3 years ago)

  • Kevin McCallister:
    Hello. [machine gun fire]
    ‐ Submitted by James C (4 years ago)

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