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News / Columns / Total Recall
Total Recall: It's a Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad World
Celebrating the best of so-bad-it's-good cinema: Plan 9 From Outer Space, Manos, the Hands of Fate, Alone in the Dark.
by Tim Ryan | January 09, 2008
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It's January, Hollywood's annual dumping ground for the most mediocre titles on the studios' shelves. Thus, we at RT thought it was a good time to get into the spirit of things by taking a closer look at some of the most misbegotten, perversely wonderful films of all time.

The appreciation of so-bad-it's-good cinema is not new. As Village Voice critic J. Hoberman noted in his seminal essay "Bad Movies," "The Surrealists loved bad movies, seeing them as subversive attacks on the tyranny of narrative form." And as the great critic Pauline Kael wrote in "Trash, Art, and the Movies" in 1969, "Movies are so rarely great art that if we cannot appreciate great trash we have very little reason to be interested in them." However, it was the publication of Michael and Harry Medved's book The Fifty Worst Movies of All Time that helped to usher in a new, codified fondness for cinematic ineptitude; a few years later, the institution of the annual Golden Raspberry Awards and the popularity of Mystery Science Theater 3000 brought ironic movie appreciation to the mainstream.

However, in the ensuing years, it's become increasingly difficult to determine that certain je ne sais quoi that distinguishes a merely mediocre film from a sublimely bad one. Hollywood churns out plenty of laugh-free comedies and unexciting action flicks each year, but many are made with at least a semblance of proficiency and feature competent actors. Lapses in craft don't necessarily make for bad movies, either; the many supporters of the film noir classic Detour (100 percent) will concede that it is riddled with technical imperfections. Intentions are important, too: films with camp followings, like Road House (30 percent) and R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet may be loaded with absurd dialogue and overheated plotting, but it's pretty clear that's what their makers were going for. And for every perversely hilarious folly like Valley of the Dolls (36 percent), there are theoretical so-bad-they're-good entries (From Justin to Kelly, nine percent, or Myra Breckinridge, 26 percent) that are, in reality, pretty much unwatchable. (Frankly, I'd be surprised if RT's worst-reviewed film of all time, Ballistic: Ecks Vs. Sever, has any ironic defenders.)

What makes for a truly stellar so-bad-it's-good movie is a gulf between conception and execution so wide it helps audiences to reconsider the notions of what constitutes good filmmaking. No essay on bad movies is complete without mention of Edward D. Wood, Jr., the master of delirious cinematic wrong-headedness. So enamored was Wood with the process of directing (and so tight were his budgets), that he would rarely, if ever, reshoot a scene. Utilizing every cut-rate trick in the book (hubcaps stood in for flying saucers, stock footage abounds), Wood crafted a series of anti-masterworks that brought to light his obsessions; Glen or Glenda? (33 percent) was a plea for the tolerance of transvestites (of which Wood was an enthusiast), and Bride of the Monster (29 percent), the last speaking role of Bela Lugosi, whom the director considered to be a great star, even years after his prime. Wood's films were so weird and so seemingly incompetent they stayed well below Hollywood's radar during his lifetime.

But a funny thing happened on the way to obscurity and posthumous derision. Slowly but surely, Wood's films were absorbed into the cinematic cannon, not because of their quality but because of their singularity: nobody made bad movies like these. Hoberman has called Wood an unconscious avant-gardist, and he's something of a patron saint for against-all-odds indie filmmakers. (Tim Burton's brilliant, Oscar-winning biopic didn't hurt matters, either.) Wood's most famous work, Plan Nine From Outer Space (60 percent!), was long considered the worst movie ever made. But how bad is it, really, more people today have seen it than, say, How Green Was My Valley? Featuring an all-star ensemble of Wood regulars (including former wrestler Tor Johnson, ghoul girl Vampira, and charisma-free narrator Criswell), Plan 9 tells the story of aliens who want to reanimate the dead into an army that will conquer the world. After shooting only three minutes with Lugosi before his death, Wood hired a chiropractor friend to flesh out the role (which he did -- by covering his face with his cape). The mistakes are too numerous to count: characters call each other by their real names, daytime and nighttime scenes butt against each other (sometimes in alternating shots), cardboard tombstones shake in the graveyard scenes, and the fight sequences are some of the stiffest ever captured on film. But Plan 9's badness is so pervasive and so original that contemporary critics find it -- gasp! -- pretty impressive. "Like the greatest cinema poets, [Wood] always managed to work in his own particular pet pleasures or concerns, and that odd, ear-bending dialogue is almost like a bizarre kind of open-verse poetry," wrote Jeffrey M. Anderson of Combustable Celluloid.


Plan 9 from Outer Space: The best lines.
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Comments (1-20 of 31 posts) | Reply
alarson37
alarson37 writes:
on Jan 09 2008 05:25 PM

1st Post, WOO HOO.

And one of my favorite topics too, alful movies....

My current fave bad movie is "Gorgo" a 2nd rate Godzilla (if that's possible). I remember seeing it the 1st time about a year before it was on MST3K and thinking "This has to be on there". Nothing better than guys in rubber suits destroying cardboard cities.


(Reply to this)
Jimbo93
Jimbo93 writes:
on Jan 09 2008 05:28 PM

haven't seen Plan 9 yet, but Ed Wood the movie is great.


(Reply to this)
Matanuki
Matanuki writes:
on Jan 09 2008 06:39 PM

What's funny about "Alone in the Dark" is the trailer looks kinda cool. But then you see the movie...

Maybe Boll reversed it this time. The trailer for his "In The Name Of The King: A Dungeon Siege Tale" (a title that's probably longer than the script) looks incredible bad. So maybe the movie itself is actually... Naw, probably not.


(Reply to this)
witherwings
witherwings writes:
on Jan 09 2008 06:49 PM

Manos. The Hands of Fate.

(Reply to this)
Mr. Bowler
Mr. Bowler writes:
on Jan 09 2008 07:11 PM

Why does Uwe Boll keep making movies? He makes some of the worst movies and then gets insulted when critics don't like them. Get a clue Boll.

(Reply to this)
walkingdead09
walkingdead09 writes:
on Jan 09 2008 07:12 PM

Godzilla IMO. So much hype for it to be sooo bad. Casting was bad, plot was bad. Raptors in MSG. Just awful. I hate hollywood, yet can't turn away.

(Reply to this)
quigonjim1
quigonjim1 writes:
on Jan 09 2008 07:44 PM

Try Luthor the Geek. Dumbest thing ever filmed.

(Reply to this)
Nick Hershey
Nick Hershey writes:
on Jan 09 2008 11:16 PM

So the Manos director was a fertilizer salesman. I believe that was also Scott Peterson's profession.

(Reply to this)
vaodsi
vaodsi writes:
on Jan 09 2008 11:36 PM

a friend of mine saw Alone, and i asked him how it was... his answer was "BOLL-*****!"
whatever happened to that very disturbing looking comedy(?) POSTAL? was that even released?


(Reply to this)
Young Turk
Young Turk writes:
on Jan 10 2008 12:36 AM

In reply to this comment (#1448700)
He isn't making them for critics or for viewers. The whole thing is a sham, there is a tax law in Germany where movie investors can write off their investment as a tax deduction if it tanks (which all of his movies have so far). This is specifically for movie production however, it does not apply to anything else, therefore he is using it for what it was intended for. If you think the man is a douche, stop watching, whining, paying attention to him and eventually he might go away, but probably not. Though this way you can practically deny his and his horrible work's existence.

(Reply to this)
arik1969
arik1969 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 01:28 AM

Without a doubt the worst movie I've ever seen has to be "The Aurora Encounter." It is truly, jaw-dropping-ly bad. It is almost on an Ed Wood level. You sit there and wonder how anyone could think, at any time, that what they were making was even remotely watchable. My mother subjected my brother and I to this movie when we were kids, and we only made it through 45 minutes. That had to have been at least 20 years ago, and the movie became, over time, a joke in our family. So much so, in fact, that when I gave my brother the DVD for Christmas, the response was so great that it was worth every penny, even if it never makes it into the player. Yes, it was THAT bad.

(Reply to this)
kenny356
kenny356 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 05:54 AM

What, no mention of "Howard te Duck?"

(Reply to this)
Spencer1951
Spencer1951 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 06:51 AM

Attack of The Killer Tomatoes ranks up there with Plan 9. And then again, there's The Fearless Vampire Killers starring the tragic Sharon Tate. I was just a kid and my dad took me to see Gorgo. I was hooked on monster flicks - but after seeing Gorgo, I always felt bad for the monsters. I am also of an age to have seen the Ed Woods movies in the theaters and not just seeing them in later years as part of a cult group. They wowed me then and they still wow me now. And Johnny Depp as Ed Wood in an angora sweater doesn't hurt the eyes either - LOL.

(Reply to this)
Ophiuchus
Ophiuchus writes:
on Jan 10 2008 06:58 AM

Actually, Wood didn't film those three minutes of Lugosi specifically for Plan 9 - he just decided to use the last footage he'd ever shot of him and build a film around it. Also, the stand-in was actually Mrs Wood's chiropractor.

*is a bad movie geek*


(Reply to this)
Ophiuchus
Ophiuchus writes:
on Jan 10 2008 06:59 AM

Actually, Wood didn't film those three minutes of Lugosi specifically for Plan 9 - he just decided to use the last footage he'd ever shot of him and build a film around it. Also, the stand-in was actually Mrs Wood's chiropractor.

*is a bad movie geek*


(Reply to this)
alarson37
alarson37 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 09:10 AM

Another MST favorite of mine..."Santa Claus Conquers the Martians"...the title alone is classic, and the movie is equally awful.

(Reply to this)
Tim Ryan
Tim Ryan writes:
on Jan 10 2008 09:32 AM

In reply to this comment (#1450103)
Good call. my bad. it's been changed.

BTW, it appears Postal is getting a spring release.


(Reply to this)
Blade501
Blade501 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 11:09 AM

You guys want bad, I got bad for you.

Killer Condom

No joke. It's a real movie. Check it out. Be either drunk or high when you see it too. It's THAT bad.


(Reply to this)
Blade501
Blade501 writes:
on Jan 10 2008 11:10 AM

You guys want bad, I got bad for you.

Killer Condom

No joke. It's a real movie. Check it out. Be either drunk or high when you see it too. It's THAT bad.


(Reply to this)
acton acton
acton acton writes:
on Jan 10 2008 11:31 AM

I saw the trailer for in the name of the king and it looked really good then i saw directed by boll. damn it damn it damn it damn it, what in the hell, all his trailers look great, then you see the film and it sucks. And usaully ruins the careers of the actors involved in it, I like stathum, and ray I guess i mine as well see this expected crapfest cause it will probally be the last time to see those actors, thanks ewe boll I really hate your guts I hope someone assasinates you really soon, you have destroyed too many careers I hope someone destroys you, your name even says S*H*I*T*.

(Reply to this)
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