Weekly Ketchup: Iron Man 2 coming in 2010

Greg Dean Schmitz recaps the week's 10 biggest stories about upcoming movies.

#1 PREPARE TO BE MARVELED AND AVENGED

Last week, even before Iron Man opened to $100+ million, it was known that Marvel Studios was going to have a financial report this past Monday, in which they were likely to reveal their future plans, with the only real question mark being whether the movie would merit a sequel. And it did, with Iron Man 2 now scheduled for April 30th, 2010, although Jon Favreau is not yet locked to return as director (he probably will, though). A few weeks later, Thor, the Norse god of thunder will get his movie adaptation in full Asgardian fantasy glory, with The First Avenger: Captain America (tentative title) expected on May 6th, 2011, and all three likely to be featured in The Avengers in July, 2011 (along with other likely Avengers like Hawkeye). It's all very exciting, and with the quality Marvel proved itself capable of deliving when it produces its own characters, we should all be in for a treat.


#2 WHAT A (BIO)SHOCK

Last year's Bioshock videogame was a critical darling, hailed for its atmospheric setting and story about an underwater city called Rapture that is the remnants of a 1930s scientific/social experiment, and is now home to strange horrors. The game's publisher, Take-Two, has set up a deal with Universal, with Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean) to direct, that they hope has been structured to avoid the problems that have besieged Microsoft's HALO movie plans. With a script being written by John Logan (The Aviator, Sweeney Todd), the director hopes to start pre-production on what should be a visual stunner as soon as the script is done.


#3 I LOVE LAMP 2: I LOVE CHAIR

It's just an off-hand comment made in an interview, but hey, that's good enough for the Internet movie press on most days, displaying a journalistic tradition that Ron Burgundy would be proud of. The subject, of course, is Anchorman 2, which director Adam McKay says he and Will Ferrell are expecting to work on sometime in the next few years, after some other projects get taken care of. What exactly such a movie would cover is unknown, as is whether or not all of the original cast members (like, say, Steve Carell) would be able to return.


#4 MISSION: RECONCILIATION

Remember all the news and hype a few years back when Viacom/Paramount's studio boss, Sumner Redstone, showed the door to Tom Cruise, after the star did all that jumping about on Oprah's couch, and stated his opinions on what sort of things Brooke Shields puts in her mouth? Well, apparently the sweet, sweet lure of box office gold is just too much of a monkey to get off your back, because Paramount is once again talking about maybe making more Mission: Impossible movies with Tom Cruise. There's no director, no script, etc, but if Cruise and Paramount do actually get back together, I'm sure silly little details like those can be taken care of.


#5 YET ANOTHER MOVIE CONCEPT THAT SOUTH PARK DID FIRST

When Eric Cartman got himself frozen and woke up hundreds of years later in an extended spoof of the late '70s sci-fi TV series, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, I think I snorted up whatever I was drinking in laughter, at the same time wondering if younger fans of South Park even knew what Buck Rogers was. Well, apparently, the family that controls the rights to the Buck Rogers licensing empire thinks the way for it to return is another spoof as well, because that's what they reportedly have in mind. The thing about the original show, though, was that it wasn't itself comedic inherently. Buck Rogers took its science fiction premise quite seriously, but it also happened to feature Erin Grey in awesome skin tight outfits and an annoying little robot pal. One name that has already been mentioned (but not official or signed on) for a possible director is Frank Miller, whose adaptation of Will Eisner's The Spirit may prove to be more comic/spoofy than Sin City would have suggested, but it's difficult to image what Miller's noir style would do with the jumpsuits and bright sets of the Buck Rogers TV show. Then again, maybe that's what would make him perfect.


#6 MAKING $100 MILLION OUT OF BUBBLE GUM, A BOBBY PIN AND POCKET LINT

Speaking at an event recently, Lee David Zlotoff, the creator of the classic adventure TV show, MacGyver, revealed that plans are in motion to bring the inventive secret agent to the big screen. No details other than that are known, but that shouldn't stop anyone from speculating. As with Magnum, P.I., my own personal thoughts are that they should just stick with the original star (Richard Dean Anderson), but knowing how these things usually work out, I would guess that's probably unlikely. Then again, I'm not quite as emotionally invested in MacGyver as in Magnum (of which I saw every episode twice, religiously, in that era when TV was pretty much the best thing going on a daily basis). MacGyver, I watched occasionally, but his gimmick seemed a lot more, you know, gimmicky. Put MacGyver in a life-threatening situation with a very bare set of materials, and he would figure out a way to overcome. It's a cool ability, but it is very easy for the MacGyver concept to fall into either satire, or seem like one of those cable handycraft shows ("3 hours and a bucket of glue... can our expert fix the Hoover Dam in time?").


#7 ANOTHER MOVIE THAT MIGHT INSPIRE A BROADWAY SHOW THAT MIGHT INSPIRE A MOVIE

Johnny Knoxville and Parker Posey have been cast as the leads in Fruitcake, the next directorial effort from Baltimore's most successful weirdo, John Waters (his first since 2004's A Dirty Shame). The movie gets its title from a boy named after his favorite dessert, who runs away after he and his parents are caught stealing meat, and while on the run, he meets a girl being raised by two gay men. The whole "meat stealing parents" thing has been done to death in countless other movies, OBVIOUSLY, but maybe somewhere in there, we might find some creativity from the director of Pink Flamingos.


#8 BOW BEFORE YOUR BIZARRE CGI QUADRAPED MASTERS

20th Century Fox has announced a release date of March 19th, 2010 for Alvin and the Chipmunks 2, which suggests that they are in fact making a sequel to the movie that CGI'ed the beloved 1960s singing chipmunks into hip hopping, rapping chipmunks. If you can't handle the 20+ month wait until that cinematic gem hits, then at least you can spend your time today enjoying the trailer for Beverly Hills Chihuahua, which hit the web this week. I've never had a PCP trip, much less a bad one, but I've got to imagine this might be what one looks like. To repeat the point, when you see a psychiatric asylum in a TV show or a movie, and there's poor guys slumped over with their eyes closed, that might be what they see when they open them.


#9 CUCKOO, CUCKOO FOR HORROR REMAKES

Maybe everyone in Hollywood should just abandon all other projects and just focus on horror remakes. All horror remakes, all the time. Who's the the latest to devote his life to this apparently addictive trend? Breck Eisner, son of former Disney bigwig Michael Eisner, got his big screen directorial start on Sahara, and is now preparing for a remake of the early '70s George A. Romero horror movie, The Crazies, with another remake, Universal's The Creature from the Black Lagoon waiting in the wings afterwards. The thing is, The Crazies was sort of already remade; it was called 28 Days Later and its sequel 28 Weeks Later. As for The Creature from the Black Lagoon, the concept might work for a remake, but knowing how studios rework titles, will Universal be able to let it go out the gate intact. I smell an imminent change to Black Lagoon or maybe just The Creature. Just a hunch.


#10 DONNIE DARKO 2: BACK TO THE FUTURE

With the first film's writer and director, Richard Kelly, having no involvement, production starts soon on S. Darko, the sequel to Donnie Darko, the bizarre little sci-fi comedy that introduced most of us to Jake Gyllenhaal. This time around, the focus will be on Donnie's little sister, several years later, as she experiences strange dreams. This one has the mild touch of "direct to video" on it, but given the fervor with which Donnie Darko fans adore the movie, I still had to make sure I covered it.


You can contact Greg Dean Schmitz via a message at the RT Forums, the thread there devoted to him, or his MySpace page.

Comments

jokerboy1991

jack giroux

Love that there fast tracking Iron man 2. Like that there finnaly making Captain America, I say Matt Damon. Not sure about Thor movie, and I cant picture an Avengers movie. Anchorman 2 would be cool. Hate that there making a D.Darko sequal, and maybe we will finnaly get a good video game flick that finnaly has a talanted director.

May 9 - 06:56 PM

jokerboy1991

jack giroux

Also Bioshock cold be good, because it has John Logan writing it.

May 9 - 06:59 PM

CoUcH ToMaToE DoUgIe

Shawn Amoroso

Hooray, a MacGyver movie!!!! Someone call Patty and Selma, because

this movie is going to be terrific....unless richard dean anderson isn't it:(

and if he isn't then, well that would be sacrilage!!! It must be Anderson or

else!!! I mean C'mon its MacGyver not jmes bond, Anderson still is wise and

cool (right?) enough to paly the hero. its not like he has to be this all

powerful ninja warrior or somethin.

May 9 - 08:15 PM

Jimbo93

Conor Holt

How can Donnie Darko 2 work without Richard Kelly or Jake Gyllenhall? The original had Kelly's incredible directing and script, and Jake IS DONNIE DARKO? Direct to DVD sounds right. I'd prefer not made at all.

May 9 - 08:54 PM

lestatthevampire

Tyler D

Donnie Darko 2 huh?



______________________________________
fear love


Put the "X" where you see fit

May 9 - 09:00 PM

CoUcH ToMaToE DoUgIe

Shawn Amoroso

Greg Dean Schmitz, love the respect for the South park knowledge

and y'know Matt and Trey's greatness when they can make Buck rodgers cool

again(in the "Go God Go" episodes ). Now the question is will Miller include

the science otters ;)

May 9 - 09:16 PM

JettaJameson

James Lowell

MacGyver: The Movie? Hahaha! I could see it as nothing else than a comedy, in the same vein as the forthcoming Get Smart.

Stoked for Fruitcake for no other reason than the wonderfully divine Parker Posey. I worship that woman.

As for the Thor movie. Snore. Sounds just dreadful. I'll be skipping that one for sure. Where arethe female superhero movies? We've only had Elektra and she isnt exactly a hero. And it wasn't exactly good. I'm skipping over Catwoman for obvious reasons.

And lastly, my plea to Paramount, go with your first instinct. Keep Tom Cruise fired. That nut job needs to be blasted into space on a rocket with the rest of the Scientologists. Find an actor who people still like. Another Mission:Impossible starring Cruise is destined to fail.

May 9 - 09:34 PM

Bigbrother

Big Brother

I'm hopeing DC does a Birds of Prey movie. That's got potential even though they don't have the name recognition of a Wonder Woman.

May 10 - 02:37 AM

JettaJameson

James Lowell

OMG!!!!!! Me too!!!!! I loved the show and can't wait to buy the series on DVD in July! A movie would just be the best thing to EVER happen!!!!!

May 10 - 07:43 AM

mjprogue

Mike PArker

Wow...sucks to be you...Thor could be fantastic.

And Cruise is still popular..like it or not.

The guy's meltdown on Oprah was still 1000 times more sane than Oprah herself...or the majority of her guests. Scientologists are certainly nut jobs...but no more so than some other religions out there.

May 11 - 05:13 PM

Heradite

Carlos Uribe

I seriously want whatever Disney is having. They surely must have stolen Nintendo's stash...

May 9 - 09:37 PM

sunsaz

Chris Moore

1,2: Comic book film will be > video game film. It always has been.
3: Would like to see this happen, but I won't get my hopes up.
4: Guess UA's attempt to buy the MI rights from Paramount fell through.
5,6: Good concepts, but they'll be bombs.
7,8,9: Unoriginal ideas AND bombs.
10: Three words - straight to video.

May 9 - 10:47 PM

CenoBiteMe2000

Ghoul God

Studios should save remakes/adaptations for Direct-to-DVD, and invest the money wisely on new concepts or sequels.

Didn't care for the first Donnie Darkmeat.

That said, I'm drooling in anticipation for a Diff'rent Strokes movie...not!

May 10 - 02:12 AM

Bigbrother

Big Brother

I'm hopeing DC does a Birds of Prey movie. That's got potential even though they don't have the name recognition of a Wonder Woman.

May 10 - 02:37 AM

JettaJameson

James Lowell

OMG!!!!!! Me too!!!!! I loved the show and can't wait to buy the series on DVD in July! A movie would just be the best thing to EVER happen!!!!!

May 10 - 07:43 AM

Nathiest

Nathan Blank

DONNIE DARKO 2 pisses me off more then anything because it's obvious that whom ever is producing this film totally did not get the first one. First Donnie was not having visions if you think that he was then you're an idiot. Donnie's "visions" where in fact just his brain trying to cope with an never ending time paradox that of which Donnie himself was starting to become aware of. It's simple I don't see how anyone could misunderstand it? Donnie Darko is a brilliant piece of science fiction please don't ruin it.

May 10 - 07:10 AM

Shompy

Sean Thompson

Donnie's "visions" where in fact just his brain trying to cope with an never ending time paradox that of which Donnie himself was starting to become aware of. It's simple I don't see how anyone could misunderstand it?

am i the only one who thought that quote was really funny?
having only seen donnie once when it came out and thinking it was a muddled boring mess, im afraid i must have misunderstood something there. my bad

May 11 - 01:02 PM

JettaJameson

James Lowell

OMG!!!!!! Me too!!!!! I loved the show and can't wait to buy the series on DVD in July! A movie would just be the best thing to EVER happen!!!!!

May 10 - 07:43 AM

quigelscola

Owen Quigley

i dont understand why there making a Donnie Darko Dos, stupid.....Iron Man 2 sounds great, now that Marval is doing there own thing, all the movies that come out of there are gonna be sick. As for Captin America, thank god there finally doing it, should have been the first movie they made, and as for the cap, i dont understand why no one can see that Daniel Craig is the perfect the perfect Steve Rogers. His performance in Munich was amazing, he was steve rogers, who cares if he isnt American, no one is.

May 10 - 07:45 AM

tomwaitsjrHAPPYICONOCLAST

Greg Guro

For the love of all that is good, do not click on the Chihuahua trailer.

I just puked on my face. I think it is such a disgrace, that I puked on my face.

No one is an American? WELL GUESS WHAT? I AM! And you know what else? I just puked on my face!

May 10 - 08:13 AM

TombstoneLawDog

Daniel Klein

..but did tomwaits puke on his face, though?


Hate to sound negative (again/still) but most of these ideas sound REALLY bad and 'yes,' I agree, the Darko sequel smacks as the latest sign of the appocalypse. Reserve a place for it at your local gas station next to the Jim Carrey-less Jim Carrey sequels.

And open letter to Will Ferrell: Dude, you had a great run, and I seriously respect you spinning literally hundreds of millions of dollars out of EXACTLY the same premise over and over. That takes honest-to-god skill at marketing and some decent comedic chops.
HOWEVER, the moment is ending (see, generally, 'Semi-Pro'). PLEASE don't f#ck around with one of your only true classics ('Anchorman' being 1, 'Old School' being the other).

Finally, I agree with y'all about Richard Dean Anderson *MAKING* MacGuyver, but he's a little.. how you say? Ah yes.... OLD for this sh#t.

May 10 - 08:32 AM

tomwaitsjrHAPPYICONOCLAST

Greg Guro

MacGuyver can just make a time machine for Richard Dean Anderson. . .

HOW IS THAT FOR A SPACE-TIME PARADOX?!?!?!?!?

. . . MadWorld is one of my all time favorite movie songs. . . better than 3-whatever mafia and Oscars catering to horrible street cred songs.

May 10 - 02:23 PM

Humblebee

Emily M.

"When Eric Parkman got himself frozen"

Parkman? It's Cartman, actually. Unless I'm missing a play on a character name from the sci fi show, which I'll admit I've never seen D:

May 10 - 03:59 PM

crossouttheD

Dave Anderson

To Jokerboy, no, i hate Matt Damon and everything his ugly fat face does. Don't make such bad suggestions that could ruin Captain America. Why do people insist on furthering the stereotype that Matt Damon is'nt annoying to watch act.

May 10 - 05:43 PM

jokerboy1991

jack giroux

Beacause Damon can do kick *** action flicks, while he can also do quality flciks. Have u ever seen The Bourne movies, good will hunting, the departed, Dogma, Rounders, Syriana, Rainmaker, Saving private ryan, or the legend of bagger vance? also u are an idiot, most people like matt damon.

May 10 - 06:51 PM

jokerboy1991

jack giroux

Beacause Damon can do kick *** action flicks, while he can also do quality flciks. Have u ever seen The Bourne movies, good will hunting, the departed, Dogma, Rounders, Syriana, Rainmaker, Saving private ryan, or the legend of bagger vance? also u are an idiot, most people like matt damon.

May 10 - 06:51 PM

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