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Mean Machine (2002)

tomatometer

34

Average Rating: 4.9/10
Reviews Counted: 56
Fresh: 19 | Rotten: 37

Despite some genuine wit, this crowd pleaser is filled with too many cliches.

45

Average Rating: 5.4/10
Critic Reviews: 22
Fresh: 10 | Rotten: 12

Despite some genuine wit, this crowd pleaser is filled with too many cliches.

audience

73

liked it
Average Rating: 3.5/5
User Ratings: 37,956

My Rating

Movie Info

The classic Burt Reynolds football-behind-bars flick The Longest Yard crosses the pond and gets an appropriate British accent in the process in this rough-and-tumble mixture of sports and action-comedy. Danny Mehan (Vinnie Jones) was one of the biggest stars in British football (what Americans call soccer), until he was caught rigging a game during a championship tournament. In the wake of this scandal, Danny's career takes a nosedive and his life spins out of control, until he finally ends up

R,

Drama, Art House & International, Comedy

Jul 16, 2002

Paramount Classics - Official Site External Icon

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Cast

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March 20, 2006:
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All Critics (67) | Top Critics (25) | Fresh (19) | Rotten (37) | DVD (13)

Holds its ground as a mid-budget Hollywood knockoff.

July 20, 2002 Full Review Source: Chicago Tribune
Chicago Tribune
Top Critic IconTop Critic

A likably energetic star vehicle for English sports god Vinnie Jones.

March 14, 2002
Philadelphia Inquirer
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It's still a hoot, sports cliches, prison movie cliches and all.

March 14, 2002
Orlando Sentinel
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Another incomprehensible trash explosion from the Guy Ritchie school of cinematic slugfests.

March 13, 2002
New York Observer
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It's mildly entertaining, especially if you find comfort in familiarity. But it's hardly a necessary enterprise.

March 9, 2002 Full Review Source: Houston Chronicle
Houston Chronicle
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Dramatically lackluster.

March 8, 2002
Washington Post
Top Critic IconTop Critic

By the final whistle you're convinced that this Mean Machine was a decent TV outing that just doesn't have big screen magic.

March 26, 2003 Full Review Source: RTE Interactive (Dublin, Ireland)

On its own, it's not very interesting. As a remake, it's a pale imitation.

July 11, 2002 Full Review Source: eFilmCritic.com
eFilmCritic.com

Some of the acting is average, the direction is below average at times, and the writing is way below average most of the time.

June 28, 2002 Full Review Source: Supercala.com
Supercala.com

La cinta comienza intentando ser un drama, rápidamente se transforma en una comedia y termina por ser una parodia absolutamente predecible

May 18, 2002
Cinenganos

The whole affair is as predictable as can be.

April 5, 2002 Full Review Source: Kansas City Star
Kansas City Star

The scriptwriters are no less a menace to society than the film's characters.

March 29, 2002 Full Review Source: eFilmCritic.com
eFilmCritic.com

There's just something about watching a squad of psychopathic underdogs whale the tar out of unsuspecting lawmen that reaches across time and distance.

March 14, 2002 Full Review Source: Orlando Weekly
Orlando Weekly

Recapitulates Yard by eliminating the personality of the original, without adding a personality of its own.

March 14, 2002
Philadelphia Daily News

An even more predictable, cliche-ridden endeavor than its predecessor.

March 8, 2002
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

The comedy -- despite a plethora of attempts -- isn't particularly funny, let alone hilarious, and the drama is laughably bad when not gratingly predictable.

March 8, 2002 Full Review Source: Screen It!
Screen It!

Follows the original film virtually scene for scene and yet manages to bleed it almost completely dry of humor, verve and fun.

March 8, 2002 Full Review Source: Oregonian
Oregonian

Director Barry Skolnick and his screenwriters glibly tick off every point of "The Longest Yard" playbook like a checklist.

March 8, 2002 Full Review Source: Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Seattle Post-Intelligencer

Audience Reviews for Mean Machine

This was a role Footballer turned Actor Vinnie Jones was meant to play. Mean Machine is full of known British faces, perhaps topping the film off with Jason Flemyng's banter and commentary of the game.

This is prison polictics versus Team tactics.

Predictable, yet none the less entertaining
August 1, 2010
76Majikat

Super Reviewer

A cross between The Longest yard and Escape to Victory (Without the escape). Its crap. I couldn't stop laughing at the dodgy set. Skolnick gets carried away with the editing and repeats the same shots too much and although it?s a likable cast, none of them can act very well (apart from the wasted Kelly & Hemmings) and the mix of 'Drama' and 'Comedy' is poorly executed. It makes the British film industry look amateurish and quite frankly it?s an embarrassment.
October 1, 2009
SirPant

Super Reviewer

A laugh out loud and gritty action-packed good time. A film with an unlikely heart that you wouldnt expect brings out solid entertainment pleasure. Colorful characters, hard hitting action, outragious comedy and a great story. A solid enjoyment that will not let up till the end of this awsome movie. Wickedly entertaining and cool. A field goal of laughs and drama. Vinnie Jones is teriffic. David Kelly is excellent. Jason Statham is wildly intentive and fun.
February 25, 2008
allan913

Super Reviewer

this is a very british film and if you have seen the longest yard its exactly like it but americian style but reli reli gd jason statham is gawjus
September 14, 2007
FiLmCrAzY
Film Crazy

Super Reviewer

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