The Omega Code Reviews
(1999) The Omega Code
This movie is like a low budget rendition of "The DaVinci Code" released in 2006 and "Raiders Of The Lost Ark". Stars Casper Van Dien as Gillen Lane, a self help motivational guru, and works as an encryptor on the side, partially tricked into encoding the Holy Bible, by tycoon magnate Stone Alexander (Michael York). That once the Bible is encrypted, then that one person is supposed to consist to become something unexplainable. Stone also has a sidekick named Dominec (Michael Ironside) who's intentions is to execute anyone is on the way, as well as to retrieve all the Bible's already encoded passages. Also starring is Van Dien's real life wife Catherine Oxenberg playing as a reporter. The movie felt very rushed, and the budget shows as viewers are subjected to cheesy special effects. It sometimes looks like a Roger Cormon movie by todays standards.
1 out of 4 stars
[b]The Incredible Two-Headed Transplant[/b] - This movie is just crap. It was like whoever made it farted it out during a bad trip and took Bruce Dern with 'em. It was about a scientist, played by Dern, who worked in a laboratory that was conveniently part of his house out in the country. One thing leads to another and Dr. Dern sticks a head of a horny, little, criminal who looks just like Cheech Marin onto the body of an over-sized retard and then this crime against nature goes on a rampage for panties. I gave it a generous 2 out of 10, because I had a few laughs.
[b]She Creature[/b] - This is about mermaids. No, not your happy, singing mermaids. This is about evil mermaids that feed of the flesh of seaman. Ha, I just had to say seamen. Anyway, this is crap, and not only that, but it leaves you to belie that they'll make a sequel. Gag.
[b]Nostradamus[/b] - This was so painfully crappy, I didn't even watch all of it. Somewhere towards the middle, I found that sleep would be more enjoyable than finishing the movie. It's about some cop who works in homicide and has to investigate some supernatural murders. There's a time machine, Armageddon, demons, yadda, yadda, yadda... Not worth anyone's time.
[b]The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen[/b] - This wasn't too bad, but it sure as hell wasn't good. It's not worth going out of your way to see, but if a friend rents it and invites you to watch it, than why not? You can both make fun of it together.
[b]The Omega Code[/b] - It's so beyond lame that I can't even tell you the plot. I don't what it is... It might make you laugh, though, because it's just so fucking stupid.