Paul Quotes

The top Paul quotes selected by the Rotten Tomatoes community. Login to submit a quote!

• 1. Graeme Willy: Why would Jesus want to shoot Charles Darwin?
  – Submitted by Tom D (18 days ago)
• 1. Moses Buggs: The Good Lord is the only doctor she'll ever need.
  2. Agent Zoil: Copy that!
  – Submitted by Tom D (18 days ago)
• 1. Graeme Willy: No, no he's not evil, he's just a bit rude.
  – Submitted by Tom D (18 days ago)
• 1. Gus: You guys should of givin her four tits
  2. Graeme Willy: That's just sick!
  – Submitted by Connor N (30 days ago)
• 1. Adam Shadowchild Fan: Can you sign my book?
  2. Adam Shadowchild: Did you write it?
  3. Adam Shadowchild Fan: No.
  4. Adam Shadowchild: Then fuck off.
  – Submitted by Connor N (30 days ago)
• 1. Paul: You'll know it when you see it.
  – Submitted by open 7 (6 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Clive likes boning space bears!
  – Submitted by Max K (10 months ago)
• 1. Graeme Willy: Are you an alien?
  2. Paul: To you I am, yes.
  3. Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us
  4. Paul: Why does everyone always assume that, what am I doing? Am a harvesting farts?
  – Submitted by Miles F (10 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Yo fuck nuts, its probing time.
  – Submitted by Melissa D (11 months ago)
• 1. Agent Zoil: Three tits, that's awesome!
  – Submitted by Dave M (13 months ago)
• 1. Paul: What's new, fatty?
  2. Clive Gollings: It's not fat, Paul, it's power. So rude!
  – Submitted by Dave M (13 months ago)
• 1. Agent Zoil: Call me Lorenzo.
  2. Clive Gollings: Lorenzo Zoil?
  – Submitted by Lorenzo V (15 months ago)
• 1. Clive Gollings: There's a Alien in the back making bagels and coffee!
  2. Graeme Willy: Why you want tea?
  – Submitted by Caitlin B (17 months ago)
• 1. Paul: It's pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.
  2. Graeme Willy: Bob Dylan's not dead.
  3. Paul: Isn't he?
  – Submitted by Alejandro O (19 months ago)
• 1. Paul: I'm not gonna eat a DEAD bird, am I?
  – Submitted by Diego T (19 months ago)
• 1. Clive Gollings: What if we wake up and find him inserting a probe into our ANUS?
  2. Graeme Willy: Apparently they don't do that.
  – Submitted by Diego T (19 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Oh yeah! Then how do you explain me? [coming out of the bathroom and making Ruth faint]
  – Submitted by Baurushan J (20 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Hello, I'm Paul. [Clive faints]
  – Submitted by Baurushan J (20 months ago)
• 1. Paul: This is America; kidnapping a Christian? That's worse than harboring a fugitive!
  – Submitted by Nicholas L (20 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Well it's safe to say we've all learned something from this, be yourself, speak from your heart, some shit like that...
  – Submitted by Carly W (20 months ago)
• 1. Paul: This spaceship takes off really slowly. It's a little awkward.
  – Submitted by Carly W (20 months ago)
• 1. Agent Zoil: Nerds, huh?
  2. O'Reilly: Yes, they wen to Comic-Con. They met Adam Shadowchild.
  3. Agent Zoil: Who the hell's Adam Shadowchild?
  – Submitted by Dave M (20 months ago)
• 1. Clive Gollings: I'm starving.
  2. Paul: What's new, fatty?
  3. Clive Gollings: It's not fat, Paul. It's power. You're so rude.
  – Submitted by Dave M (20 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Stoke the fire!
  – Submitted by Reed H (21 months ago)
• 1. Clive Gollings: They are going to rape us and break our arms!
  2. Graeme Willy: I don't want my arms broke!
  – Submitted by Tim H (22 months ago)
• 1. Clive Gollings: Get your own alien.
  – Submitted by Buchi C (22 months ago)
• 1. Paul: [sings] Clive likes boning space bears!
  – Submitted by Carly W (22 months ago)
• 1. Paul: [after getting frisked inappropriately by O'Reilly] Get your goddamn hands off my motherfuckin' junk!
  – Submitted by Carly W (22 months ago)
• 1. Paul: I'm not gonna eat a dead bird, am I?
  – Submitted by Alejandro O (22 months ago)
• 1. Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us?
  2. Paul: Why does everyone always assume that?! What am I doing? harvesting farts?! How much can I learn from an ass?!
  – Submitted by Rory R (23 months ago)
• 1. Paul: Why are we holding hands?
  2. Graeme Willy: So we look like a family. Just a couple of regular guys, walking down the street, with a small cowboy.
  – Submitted by Ruben V (24 months ago)
• 1. Robbed Woman: My weed!
  – Submitted by Philip H (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: Yo Fuck nuts! It's Probing time!
  – Submitted by Cailum R (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: It's not like I set my phaser to faint!
  – Submitted by Jake L (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: Get your hand of my space junk.
  – Submitted by Lee L (2 years ago)
• 1. Graeme Willy: But your talking to us! Are you using some alien power to translate our languages so we can understand each other!?
  2. Paul: NO! IM SPEAKING FUCKING ENGLISH!!
  – Submitted by James S (2 years ago)
• 1. Adam Shadowchild: Three tits? Awesome!
  – Submitted by Adri P (2 years ago)
• 1. Ruth Buggs: Thank's Dick Milk
  – Submitted by Cosmic R (2 years ago)
• 1. Graeme Willy: You are an alien!
  2. Paul: To you I am, yes.
  3. Graeme Willy: Are you gonna probe us?
  4. Paul: Why does everyone always assume that? What am I doing? Harvesting farts? How much can I learn from an ass?
  – Submitted by Kayla D (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: [to two rednecks] Hey fucknuts! Probing time.
  – Submitted by rob g (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: [Paul is posing on the couch as Graeme prepares to draw him] Are you gonna draw me like your French girls, Jack? [blows a kiss]
  – Submitted by rob g (2 years ago)
• 1. Paul: It's probing time, fucknuts.
  – Submitted by Facebook U (2 years ago)