Critical Consensus: "TMNT" Gets Shredded; "Mimzy" Is Mixed; "Shooter" Misses; "Reign" Shines; "Pride" Sinks; Guess "Hills" Tomatometer!

This week at the movies we've got turtle power ("TMNT"), whimsy ("The Last Mimzy," starring Timothy Hutton), conspiracies ("Shooter," starring Mark Wahlberg), buddies ("Reign Over Me," starring Adam Sandler and Don Cheadle), swimmers ("Pride," starring Terrence Howard), and cannibals ("The Hills Have Eyes 2"). What do the critics have to say?



"TMNT" marks a CG return for the pizza-loving, sewer-dwelling 1980s icons. However, to paraphrase the theme song, it appears movie critics are unwilling to cut "TMNT" any slack. The film details the turtles' attempt to defeat an army of ancient warriors and the Foot Clan, despite dissention in the ranks. Critics say the CG animation looks fine, but the story is lacking, and "TMNT" lacks the goofy charm of its lower-fidelity predecessors. At 20 percent on the Tomatometer, this one appears to be a bit short on turtle power.


"20 percent Tomatometer? Oh...shellshock...!"

Based upon a short story by Lewis Padgett, "The Last Mimzy" tells the fanciful tale of two siblings who, after discovering a box of discarded toys, gain special powers, get involved with time travel, win a science contest, and run afoul with the Patriot Act. If this sounds ambitious for a kids flick, critics agree. In fact, they're saying it's too ambitious: despite excellent moments, "Mimzy" lacks focus and frequently veers towards awkward, New Age feelgoodness. It's at 52 percent Tomatometer.


"Through concentration, I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will."

Leaving the extravagance of "King Arthur" and "Tears of the Sun" behind, director Antoine Fuqua tones it down for "Shooter," a simpler kind of action flick. One man, one gun, one word for the title. Mark Wahlberg stars as former Army sniper Bob Lee Swagger (a movie moniker if there ever was one) who finds himself on the run and in the midst of a government conspiracy. The scribes say Wahlberg does a decent job, but the film skimps on logic and contains more plot holes than a target down at your local gun club. At 29 percent on the Tomatometer, "Shooter" misses the mark.


"I have a coupon for this I got from the penny saver."

In "Reign Over Me," Adam Sandler, looking like "Blonde on Blonde"-era Bob Dylan, stars as a man still reeling from the loss of his family in the 9/11 attacks. He drops in on his college roommate (Don Cheadle), who's got family issues of his own. Critics say "Reign Over Me" provides proof, were it needed after "Punch Drunk Love," that Adam Sandler is capable of playing serious roles, and helmer Mike Binder manages to keep the film funny and touching without overdosing on sentiment. At 73 percent on the Tomatometer, "Reign" shines.


"Everybody's gone but me and you, and I can't be the last to leave."

Terrence Howard is a terrific actor, but critics say he can't save "Pride," a by-the-numbers sports flick based on an interesting true story. Howard stars as Jim Ellis, the coach of an all-African American high school swim team; the squad faces a number of obstacles, from racism to unsympathetic city officials. The pundits say Howard gives another outstanding performance, but "Pride" sinks under the weight of cliché. It currently stands at 38 percent on the Tomatometer.


"If you want respect, you've got to ask nicely and say please."

The peepers of critics have yet to grace "The Hills Have Eyes 2," since it wasn't screened. This sequel to a remake tells the tale of a group of National Guardsmen who stumble upon a group of cannibals in the New Mexico desert. Finish up that tasty meal you're eating and Guess the Tomatometer.


"You know, a little lotion would help those dry hands."

Also opening this week in limited release: "Air Guitar Nation," a spirited rockumentary about the art of the air strum, is at 100 percent; "Offside," Iranian master Jafar Panahi's examination of politics through the lens of soccer, is at 95 percent; "The Page Turner," a Hitchcockian tale of revenge and music from France, is at 88 percent; "Boy Culture," featuring the trials and tribulations of three gay roommates, is at 86 percent; "Journey From the Fall," a drama about a family's struggles at the end of the Vietnam's civil war, is at 67 percent; "Colour Me Kubrick," a comedy about a man impersonating the director starring John Malkovich, is at 58 percent; and the noirish "First Snow," starring Guy Pearce and Piper Perabo, is at 50 percent; and "Memory," a sci-fi thriller starring Ann-Margaret and Dennis Hopper, is at 20 percent.


"Don't move. You have a bee on your head."

And finally, props to SlyDante for coming the closest to guessing "Dead Silence"'s 24 percent Tomatometer.

Recent Mark Wahlberg Movies:
-------------------------------------
93% -- The Departed (2006)
70% -- Invincible (2006)
52% -- Four Brothers (2005)
61% -- I Heart Huckabees (2004)
73% -- The Italian Job (2003)

Recent Adam Sandler Movies:
-------------------------------------
32% -- Click (2006)
30% -- The Longest Yard (2005)
52% -- Spanglish (2004)
43% -- 50 First Dates (2004)
42% -- Anger Management (2003)

Comments

DreCosby

Dre Cosby

HHE2- 29%

Mar 22 - 05:26 PM

Raziel66

First Last

[b]Tomatometer[/b]
Hills will get 8%... if it's lucky.

Mar 22 - 05:37 PM

rainfall

nicholas butler

i think hhe2= 22%

Mar 22 - 05:51 PM

rdproductions

Haddy Rikabi

Hills 2 will have a 32%.

Mar 22 - 06:21 PM

-eternity-

lol eternity

Hills Have Eyes 2- 14%

Mar 22 - 07:11 PM

Abalistar

Richie Miller

I'll guess Hills 2 will get about 43%. Slightly lower than the first.

Mar 22 - 07:14 PM

mystu

paul viret

1 dollar Bob.

Mar 22 - 09:59 PM

OGRE3001

Carl Booth

I give it an 008%. Hopefully no one will see this and this will be the end of it...

Mar 22 - 11:57 PM

Pilgermann

Michael Warren

Are the bad TMNT reviews a surprise? Nope.

I just watched it a short while ago, and it'll amuse those who're still Ninja Turtles fans, but not many other folks. I enjoyed myself but my sensible side says it's a bad film.

:/

Mar 23 - 12:03 AM

AlienSeed

Jeff Kohorst

I've seen three of the new movies so far....Pride, TMNT, and Hills 2. Pride is exactly how the critics describe it. It is so cliched, that Howard gets to shout at least 10 times..."This is our house!" TMNT...everything involving the turtles is pretty good. Their relationship, conflicts, even their humor isn't too bad. The story is where the movie suffers. Once you reach the end, you can't help but look back and realize just how pointless everything in the movie was. The Foot did nothing, the monsters did nothing, and there really wasn't any real solid villains in this. The sad thing is that if the turtles had sat around and did nothing the entire movie, it still might have ended happily....they didn't do anything to solve the "conflict," if you can call it that. Finally.....Hills 2. After seeing it, I'd be amazed if this movie got 1% out of critics and casual viewers. Dialogue, acting, characters, action, all of it is Uwe Boll quality..even the cheap visual effects. The mutants weren't even interesting to watch. It's so predictable as well, that it even follows with perfect accuracy the standard horror movie character kill order. You can guess the order of the deaths within the first 10 minutes...I know I did. I'm hoping Reign over Me is good, because so far, this week's selections are weak.

Mar 23 - 12:17 AM

Pilgermann

Michael Warren

AlienSeed, you're correct about TMNT! On my way home I was thinking about how it would've been more fun just watching them hang out and do whatever. Sigh...

Mar 23 - 12:52 AM

Pilgermann

Michael Warren

AlienSeed, you're correct about TMNT! On my way home I was thinking about how it would've been more fun just watching them hang out and do whatever. Sigh...

Mar 23 - 12:52 AM

The Paki Don

Shahbaz Sarwar

Hills Have Eyes 2 will get 4 %.

Mar 23 - 03:47 AM

AudioNinja

TJ O'Neill

Hills Have Eyes 2 will get 7 percent and like it.

Mar 23 - 07:03 AM

Xhrix

David Smith

HHE2- 3%

This should be a straight to On Demand Free Movies release

Mar 23 - 07:59 AM

Unbreakable Samurai

Unbreakable Samurai

HHE2-9%
I'm really looking foreward to seeing Reign Over Me, I think I'll probably check out Shooter too.

Mar 23 - 12:18 PM

Set the Ray to Robert

Robert J.

Hill have eyes 2- 26%

Mar 23 - 03:22 PM

bribios

brian wilson

Totally underestimated Dead Silence last week. Ill give HHE2 a 36%.

Mar 23 - 05:55 PM

phill01

First Last

Four brothers was better than 52%

Mar 23 - 09:52 PM

RottenMoreno

Luis F. Moreno

[b]guess[/b]
Hills 2 shall get 35% or something around that... luckily it will be higher

Mar 24 - 11:23 AM

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