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Tommy 'See the Treasure' South
Damn I bet I missed some funny shit here.
Sep 29 - 11:05 AM
Do you even Jay Cutler?
Sep 29 - 11:07 AM
lol you make me laugh Chloe Moretz.
Sep 29 - 11:10 AM
Eh, it was funny when it was live.
Sep 29 - 11:47 AM
Life Finds a Way
Jeff's Top Ten (minus ah himself)
1. "Lois Lane approves" -Gilmore
2. "MOM! Stop fondling my asshole!" -Tanny
3. "The kids love it. "Ay, mama. That be like us on Thursdays!" -Gilmore
4. "Now he's staring in a tuxedo. Shit, son." -Diego
5. " he killed his father"
........whatever. When's this over?" -Tanny
6. "Damn, that yellow nigger PWNED her." -Diego
7. "Wanna fight"
*grabs tissues and lotion*" -Gilmore
8. "Where is the plot?!?!" -Levy
9. "TAKE IT OFF!" -Everyone
10. "You can't go around killing cops anymore."
As if you used to be able to... -Diego
Sep 29 - 09:36 AM
The Artist Formerly Known as Tutweiller
"Lois Lane approves" is one of my all-time favorites. That had me laughing my ass off. I thought I was going to wake up my parents.
Sep 29 - 09:38 AM
Chase: The Lost Trollfighter
I am so angry at myself for missing this.
Sep 29 - 09:47 AM
It was amazing, lol. Incest jokes, mom jokes, anus catchphrases, and SEPPUKUUUUUUUUUU!!! What an evening.
Sep 29 - 09:48 AM
I'm actually thinking about contributing to the RC series with something totally out of my comfort zone. Like Iron Man 3 or something.
Sep 29 - 09:54 AM
DO MAN OF STEAL YOUR MONEY.
Sep 29 - 09:56 AM
*le sigh* Ok, buddy. I'll do it.
Sep 29 - 09:59 AM
Sep 29 - 10:00 AM
Don't Snyder any more money!
Sep 29 - 10:01 AM
THIS SHALL BE EPIC! I won't watch it with you, though. Too many memories I want to forget... but can't.
Sep 29 - 10:32 AM
I'll watch the reactions to that RC. I'll be contributing to the Halloween and Twilight running commentaries.
Sep 29 - 11:13 AM
BTW, I managed to find the script online and I posted it on scribd.com.
Sep 29 - 08:20 AM
Thank you for spoiling the movie, assholes.
Sep 29 - 08:10 AM
Sep 29 - 08:13 AM
Yes, I read some of it, and Diego just fucking spoiled the rest with his review.
Sep 29 - 08:18 AM
It's a running commentary. Of OF ah course we did.
But Diego spoiled everything.
Sep 29 - 08:21 AM
Well he ah saved you from watching a terrible movie.
Sep 29 - 08:22 AM
Sep 29 - 07:03 AM
*THE OFFICIAL BETTER THAN JOHN TYLER'S RUNNING COMMENTARY SEAL*
Sep 29 - 06:50 AM
That counts for something!
My honest opinion on this is that it sucked. Tanny, Ash, and John Tyler were forgettable. Diego was decent. Tyler Levy was just like Gosling in OGF, bland, and boring. Goldblum was alright. The quote were kinda lame. I only liked the "Your brother was murdered"-Goldblum and the "X-Faggots" name by Diego. I feel this would have been better if it were just Diego and Goldblum and not the other forgettable users. Especially, ones who make comments like the one below me (Ash). Overall, the only pluses here were Diego and Goldblum. Everyone else was a pain to sit through, just like the movie you were all watching.
Final score for OGF RC....2/10. Not the best. Possibly the first anus commentary with Diego. John has the all time anus commentary with his snooze-fest, Halloween V. I only read like 4 comments before I turned off my computer and left to go to the gym.
Oh, btw, I saw August Rush......I contemplated suicide.
Sep 29 - 06:44 AM
Is ah August Rush worse than Drive?
Sep 29 - 06:46 AM
No. Diego clearly over-hyped the film. It was bad but not Drive bad. Actually, Hard Candy is now the bar to beat to be the worst film ever.
Sep 29 - 06:47 AM
The Big Pupbowski
Lol. Was I really that bad?
Sep 29 - 06:57 AM
No, you were at a ah disadvantage because you ah hadn't seen it yet.
Sep 29 - 06:59 AM
Yes. Boring, bland, and a waste of space. Just like Gosling.
Sep 29 - 07:01 AM
Ok. I might have been bad. But there was is no way I was Gosling bad.
If ah Tyler was Gosling bad he'd just write:
Sep 29 - 07:06 AM
Lol. Goldblim, out of 10 what would you give me in this commentary?
Sep 29 - 07:08 AM
Sep 29 - 07:12 AM
Thanks. Id give you and 8.5/10
Sep 29 - 07:13 AM
Sep 29 - 07:16 AM
Well at least that's a ah... fresh FRESH rating.
Sep 29 - 07:18 AM
Thers now way Im a 0! Lol
Sep 29 - 07:19 AM
Yeah, -0/10 (Same score Tut gave MoS)
Sep 29 - 07:20 AM
No, I wasn't that bad. Goldblum gave me a 7/10 so I couldn't have been that bad. Lol
Sep 29 - 07:21 AM
Two things: August Rush is just an incredible load of anus. And also, why must you be such an ass to John, Levy, and Tanny ALL THE FUCKING TIME? It's gotten really old. Everyone performed admirably on this RC; are you just pissy because you didn't get a chance to participate? Or would you like to try out your OWN running commentary, so WE can be the ones who sit back and annoyingly judge everything you say? Good to hear that you enjoyed my commentary, but if you're just going to be an ass to the other users... keep your stupid comments in your pocket.
Sep 29 - 09:30 AM
I don't give half a shit about your stupid running commentaries. You just asked for me to post a review. I did. Don't like my opinion? Too bad, so sad, fuck you.
Whatever, man. When you give an opinion, you don't have to be such an unmitigated asshole to people. Just sayin'.
Sep 29 - 09:40 AM
Oi, lemme tell you somethin. We didn't do this here for future reader's entertainment. We did it to amuse ourselves, mon. D'ya understand?
Sep 29 - 11:49 AM
So, I'm going to watch a movie and prepare my body for the Breaking Bad series finale tomorrow.
Sep 28 - 11:49 PM
OH MY GOD I CAN'T FUCKING WAIT!!!
Sep 28 - 11:53 PM
Same, man. I've been thinking about it all week.
Sep 29 - 12:03 AM
It'll be a mindfuck of epic proportions.
Sep 29 - 12:04 AM
You guys are some faggot fairy princesses.
Sep 28 - 11:36 PM
Cutler! Stop being a flamer for five seconds and tell us what you think of the RC.
Sep 28 - 11:39 PM
Sep 29 - 06:49 AM
Where were you, Cutler? No one ah... hate Refn more than you.
Sep 29 - 06:19 AM
Out. Having a life. I don't spend time on this site during night.
Sep 29 - 06:30 AM
This is ah more important than whatever you were ah doing.
Sep 29 - 06:32 AM
I was at the gym. Then, I took a shower and went to a friend's house to watch August Rush. She liked it. Me, not so much. My review of this commentary is up!
Sep 29 - 06:45 AM
Jesus. 554 posts. This is a classic.
Sep 28 - 11:30 PM
It is, isn't it?
Sep 28 - 11:32 PM
Ranking of my Running Commentaries IMO:
1) Only God Forgives
2) Deadly Friend
3) X-Faggot movies (classics, every one)
4) Getaway (car chase car chase car chase)
5) Movie 43
6) The Wicker Man (this one sucked, no one was on)
Remember, these are just mine. If I included ones I did not participate in, I might put Levy's North RC between X-Faggots and Deadly Friend. I've forgotten a lot of them, though.
Sep 28 - 11:37 PM
There's also my Halloween 5 running commentary.
Sep 28 - 11:41 PM
Well, I wasn't there for most of that (I had to go on an errand for an hour or so).
Sep 28 - 11:42 PM
Eating Doritos and masturbating do not count as errands, Diego.
Sep 28 - 11:44 PM
Speaking of masturbating, I think I'm going to watch Drive now.
Sep 28 - 11:47 PM
This is the type of shit that makes me hate you, Ash.
Sep 29 - 06:31 AM
It's safe to say that this is my new favorite RC of all time. You guys were all great. I'd like to especially thank John Tyler for being such a good sport. The best quotes of the evening were:
"TAKE IT OFF!!!" -David Tanny
"Still a ah... better love story than Twilight." -Jeff Goldblum
"Angry-looking Asian men standing in the rain. So deep." -Diego Tut
"Asian dudes flex and ah Ryan stares. Conclusion: they ah shot without a script." -Jeff Goldblum
"Holy shit. It's happening. It just occurred to me. The more I think about the movie, and the more I look at these comments, the less I'm starting to like this movie." -John Tyler
"I couldn't hold it in anymore. Fuck Nicolas Winding Refn. Fuck this movie. Drive lost points for this drivel. GODDAMNIT WHY DID I PAY $8.00 ON THIS PIECE OF SHIT AGAIN??? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU" -Ash Gilmore
"Damn, she's hot. +2 Tut-o-meter points." -Diego Tut
"More screaming... and blood. And screaming. And blood. And another scream. And another scream. And another. And he's still screaming. And panting. And bleeding. And screaming. Now he's moaning. Wow, this actor has some range." -Diego Tut
"Lois Lane approves." -Ash Gilmore
"'Your brother was murdered' '(stares.....)'" -Jeff Goldblum
"Where is the plot?" -Tyler Levy
"Tyler it ah only been an hour. Be patient." -Jeff Goldblum
It's a wrap, folks. I'll write a Tutillating review now.
Sep 28 - 11:22 PM
I look forward to reading the official review.
Sep 28 - 11:24 PM
It'll take me a while. You should check up tomorrow; don't hold your breath for it.
Sep 28 - 11:25 PM
TWILIGHT SPOILER: Vampires sparkle in the daylight.
Twilight buttfucks everything great about vampire lore to the fucking max.
Sep 28 - 11:40 PM
Not to mention werewolves, my personal favorite mythical being.
And the acting...completely nonexistent.
Sep 28 - 11:52 PM
I watched a clip. The only way I'd be able to suffer through this is if I got you guys to support me through it.
Sep 28 - 11:54 PM
I'm down to do a RC.
Damn, I forgot "Yellow Nigga" -Everyone.
We sure are ah sure are witty.
Sep 29 - 06:13 AM
It's really cool that we can get together and do stuff like this. We've never even seen eachother, yet we're like best friends. That sounds sad, but it's awesome. lol
Sep 28 - 11:16 PM
Hey man, as far as I'm concerned, you are. When I'm not with my real life friends, I'm on here chatting it up with ya'll. It'd be great to do more stuff like this. One of the reasons I love watching bad movies is watching them with others.
Sep 28 - 11:19 PM
Definitely. We need to hold an RT Convention or something someday. Would be interesting to see everyone in person.
Sep 28 - 11:23 PM
And there needs be a screening of The Room.
I've been saying that! We could all meet in a location equidistant from where we live (Omaha or something) and have a get-together at the airport Hilton. Trouble is, we might end up hating each other within the first five minutes, lol.
Sep 28 - 11:26 PM
Lol, I could definitely see that. I already know Cutler will bag on my freckles and douchebaggy voice and you'll get teased for eternity for those locks of yours.
*Whips hair back and forth* Yyyyyyyup.
That came out wrong. What I meant was it's interesting that we all seem to be genuine friends, when on other forums and forum sites people just argue and post porn links.
Sep 28 - 11:20 PM
I agree. This forum is the one refuge on the internet from stupidity. We are the hopeless minority. Power, brother.
Power. Us millennials gotta stick together.
FIGHTING FOR ALL ETERNITY AGAINST PEOPLE LIKE ROSHIT AND BRENDAN SULLIVAN!
Sep 28 - 11:27 PM
FUCK YEAH! *high five*
Sep 28 - 11:31 PM
*High five creates sonic boom, leveling mountains and cities across the globe*
Sep 28 - 11:38 PM
*also causes Nicolas Winding Refn's anus to tear from the inside out*
You know it, Gilmore!
Sep 28 - 11:43 PM
He'd probably like it too. Creepy bastard.
Sep 28 - 11:45 PM
"Pain in my anus... turns me on..." -Nicolas Winding Refn
Hey, Ash, take a look at my review of The Room.
I read it earlier. Great stuff. I also really liked your comment on how basically any rating works for that movie.
Not just any rating, but also EVERY rating.
Good night, all.
Sep 28 - 11:12 PM
Night, Jeff. Hope you had fun.
Sep 28 - 11:13 PM
I did. I ah hope to do it again soon.
Sep 28 - 11:14 PM
Night ah night.
Have a good one, Jeff.
Final Score: 3/10
Beautiful music and cinematography, but has wooden acting, zero plot, every character is a throwaway character, like 3 lines of dialogue, and overly violent. Only God Forgives is a mess, especially when compared to Drive.
Sep 28 - 11:10 PM
Let's have a little post-game commentary, guys. What were all of your scores for it? And John, what is your revised score (if you wish to change it)?
Sep 28 - 11:08 PM
1/10 for me.
So not even the cinematography did anything for you, huh?
Sep 28 - 11:11 PM
Yeah, the cinematography is great. So is the music. BUT, I detest everything else. Loathe might be a better word. I hate this fucking movie.
It's infuriatingly snobby, I agree. Time to write a Tut Review.
2/10 Disgusting, pointless but ah mercifully short.
It's okay. Good music. Fantastic cinematography. The God-Cop was interesting. But there's rarely any dialogue, the violence, while brutal, can get a bit repetitive and gratuitous, and Ryan Gosling doesn't seem to have any emotion. Why in the holy name of scrote lick did I give this 10/10 when I first saw it? You know your movie has problems when even I'm questioning why I gave it 10/10 at first.
Sep 28 - 11:15 PM
The acting isn't much, but I wouldn't say everything about the movie was bad. There were some parts now and then that I kinda liked, but that's about it.
Sep 28 - 11:17 PM
I thought you were going to do a review.
I'll do a review of OGF sometime.
Sep 28 - 11:29 PM
I'm glad you can look back and see it's flaws. Maybe if you did that with more movies, you would be more selective with the 10/10's you give.
^^ FUCKING THIS.
I just realized this was dedicated to Alejandro Jodorowsky...I'd be pissed if I were him.
Sep 28 - 11:07 PM
We did it, guys! I gotta say, that was fun. We should make this like a weekly thing. New bad movie every week at a designated day and time.
Next weekend: Pick one:
2) Batman and Robin
3) Avatar: The Last Airbender
Twilight. Let's do it.
Shiiiit, yellow nigga.
That's my new catchphrase.
Sep 28 - 11:09 PM
To be honest I ah don't think there is ah much that ah other people haven't already said.
It's the most-requested Tut Review of all time.
Sounds like a plan.
Fuck Twilight. I'm watching the reactions.
Sep 28 - 11:18 PM
Batman & Robin
I'm up for it. I just got to know in advance.
I would ah happy do it again.
I would be ah happy to do it ah do it again.
This was some of the most fun I've ever had on RT.
It was ah worth staying up until 2AM for.
I sure hope so, lol.
Im down with that.
Sep 29 - 08:14 AM
85:02-- Well, it's over. What an enormous load of pretentious anus.
Sep 28 - 11:05 PM
1/10. The anus of cinema.
Surprisingly, I'm thinking a 2/10. Awful and pretentious, but the beautiful way in which it was filmed ups the score a little for me. You know how I respect camerawork and cinematography with movies like this. Too bad that was the only redeeming quality of it.
How about a 1.5?
Can't do half-scores on RT, unfortunately.
It's ah over. It's done.
Alright folks, that was Only God Forgives.
Welp...it's over folks! We did it!
Ending explained: God is forgiving Julian of his sins, by cutting off what he committed his sins with. His hands.
Sep 28 - 11:03 PM
Sep 28 - 11:04 PM
Yeah, that's what I figured... not like it makes sense or anything.
Only God Forgives
EXTENDED ENDING: Julian and the prostitute get married, and in the last scene, she feeds Julian pudding.
Sep 28 - 11:06 PM
John... stop... please.
Really wish they would've kept that in.
That... is the most homosexual thing I have ever heard in my life.
So the pudding is a flamer.
83:22-- More karaoke...
83:03-- HANDS AND A SWORD. SHIIIIIIT, YELLOW NIGGA.
I've ah got to hand it to Refn... he's ah really come in handy as a ah director. Ryan Gosling is ah really hand-some too.
It was really well Handled.
Nyuk nyuk nyuk.
82:25-- And now they're in a forest. Huh. That's... a thing.
Sep 28 - 11:02 PM
82:12-- HANDS AGAIN.
80:40-- Really, Refn? Just... really?
Sep 28 - 11:01 PM
Still a ah... better love story than Twilight.
Sep 28 - 11:00 PM
I'll drink to that.
A statement has never been more true.
80:37-- Gosling gets AIDS from sticking his hand in his mom's open wound.
Sep 28 - 10:59 PM
Sep 28 - 10:58 PM
Holy shit. It's happening. It just occurred to me. The more I think about the movie, and the more I look at these comments, the less I'm starting to like this movie.
JOHN HAS BEEN ENLIGHTENED!!!
I'm not saying the movie is bad, because to me, it isn't, but it's disappointing considering I really liked Drive.
It's VERY bad, John.
I think the film is now okay, but I do understand why the majority of people hate it.
YOU GAVE IT A 10/10, YOU FUCKHEAD.
I'm starting to like it less. The score has now been dropped to a 6.
Wait for it...
77:55-- Damn, that yellow nigger PWNED her.
Wait for it....
So does this ah cop really have nothing else to do?
Sep 28 - 10:57 PM
So does this really ah have nothing else to do?
75:35-- YOU'RE A VERY DANGEROUS MOTHER! YOU FUCK YOUR OWN MOTHERFUCKING KIDS FOR FUCKITY FUCK SAKES!
Sep 28 - 10:56 PM
This is supposed to be a twist.
" he killed his father"
........whatever. When's this over?
No, Refn just doesn't know how to coherently develop his characters.
Really? I didn't notice.
No it's not. It's surprisingly character development. He basically says, "Screw my mom." and goes against her orders. A breakthrough for him, but the audience doesn't care enough for the character to really notice.
There are characters? I hadn't noticed that either.
I'm sorry, cutouts.
I thought we were supposed to be wondering why there are shot's of his hands, and then this "twist" that he killed his father with his hands explains all that, and the fact that he left America.
Like anyone even cares, lol.
This is true.
I guess twist is the wrong word.
75:22-- "We had a very special relationship."
Sep 28 - 10:55 PM
74:57-- ANOTHER ASIAN GUY... STARING...
Brought to you by Nicolas Winding Refn.
I think I ah need to apologize to ah every other movie I called pretentious.
Sep 28 - 10:51 PM
Still less pretentious than The Master.
Sep 28 - 10:52 PM
Sep 28 - 10:53 PM
Drive > The Master = OGF > Valhalla Rising
But they're all in the same vein of filmmaking. Pretentious shit.
Sep 28 - 10:54 PM
I'm not gonna get into this right now. We're here to trash OGF.
*stares at your crotch, then nods*
*Boring fight scene commences*
Wait...why does he keep his sword in a closet when he can just conjure it up anytime?
71:27-- Why is it called Only God Forgives?
The end. You'll see.
I highly doubt that, judging by the rest of this movie. Lol.
Ash can explain it for you, when the time comes.
I doubt that Refn himself could explain this.
70:18-- I honestly have no fucking idea what's going on.
Sep 28 - 10:50 PM
68:44-- "When I was pregnant with you, you were strange, you were different."
He was... a 'special needs' child. He can't talk.
Sep 28 - 10:49 PM
And now everyones walking away and that's exactly what Im doing. This film sucked Im going to sleep night.
Sep 28 - 10:48 PM
You were defeated. This truly is an awful movie.
Sleep tight, buddy.
Sep 28 - 10:47 PM
What is the significance of the statue? Ash?
Because Refn is a pretentious asshole who wants to make hipsters rack their brains trying to figure it out.
Finally, he admits it.
Yes! Ash ah sees the light!
I couldn't hold it in anymore. Fuck Nicolas Winding Refn. Fuck this movie. Drive lost points for this drivel. GODDAMNIT WHY DID I PAY $8.00 ON THIS PIECE OF SHIT AGAIN??? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
MY RAGE LEVEL IS OOOOOOOOVER 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Trailers = good
Movie = anus
67:33-- Just a random shot of the mom, I guess...
67:06-- FINISH HIM.
I ah don't understand why the ah mother didn't grab a gun and ah shoot the cop. The ah whole point of the movie is ah her wanting him dead.
Sep 28 - 10:46 PM
She pussied out.
There's a point to this movie?
The god-cop is basically untouchable.
Sep 29 - 08:19 AM
No tension to this fight at all...
65:31-- Can't touch this.
Sep 28 - 10:45 PM
Im going to bed after the random fight scene.
Okay. I honestly can't blame you.
63:25-- The only great scene in this film.
Sep 28 - 10:44 PM
63:42-- Cool fight music. Cool fight setting. Epic dragon head. Unfortunately, I have no IDEA why they are fighting.
Sep 28 - 10:43 PM
63:02-- So was Gosling just too busy gargling Refn's dick to realize how incredibly bad the so-called 'script' for this movie was?
Gosling was in a film based on a Nick Sparks book.
Tell me again why we think he can act.
If you wanna know, watch The Ides of March.
As well as Blue Valentine.
Watch Blue Valentine. He was great.
I gave The Ides of March a 2/10, lol.
Half Nelson, Drive, and Crazy, Stupid, Love (fuck you, I liked it)
*grabs tissues and lotion*
Okay, National Treasure.
*looks at Gosling's dick*
62:30-- "Wanna fight?"
Sep 28 - 10:42 PM
Im sorry Ive had enough. Im going to bed.
Almost to the epic beatdown scene...
Sep 28 - 10:41 PM
The ah only scene I've ah revisited.
I have this track and a couple others I bought off i-tunes. I like Cliff Martinez. He did good work with this, Drive, and Spring Breakers.
He also did the music for the Robert Redford film The Company You Keep.
Was it good?
61:26-- A stare.
Where is the plot?!?!
Tyler it ah only been an hour. Be patient.
Refn left his outline for the movie on Gosling's bedside table, but decided to go ahead and shoot the movie anyway.
Okay... I need to admit... I ah adore the music is this ah fight scene.
Yeah, it's pretty groovy.
60:10-- One hour in, and this movie has failed to impress on any level, besides the cinematography.
Sep 28 - 10:40 PM
Congratulations, you have another half-hour of movie left.
59:20-- I need to go throw up.
YOU do? I'm sick as fuck. I probably shouldn't have stayed up for this.
2/3 done and ah still waiting for the ah plot to arrive.
Sep 28 - 10:39 PM
Bye bye eye ball.
58:45-- More screaming... and blood. And screaming. And blood. And another scream. And another scream. And another. And he's still screaming. And panting. And bleeding. And screaming.
Now he's moaning. Wow, this actor has some range.
John........ how could you ah find anything good in this?
Because he's married to Ryan Gosling.
Go fuck yourself.
I'll explain in a J-Tylerflix Review.
You and Gosling are butt buddies.
Is that so?
Eyeball cutting time.
Sep 28 - 10:38 PM
This scene is unintentionally hilarious to me.
It's just fucking awful It's monotonous, fetishistic nonsense.
They ah shouldn't have kept this scene. I can hear ah Rafn jacking off behind the camera.
What's that puddle there?
57:55-- "AAAAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
Oscar-worthy dialogue right there.
We're gonna have 400 comments on this bitch.
Sep 28 - 10:37 PM
56:38-- He picked up the chopsticks, gave him the death look, and walked over to him. WHAT DID HE THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?
Sep 28 - 10:36 PM
56:00-- COVER YOUR PUPPY'S EYES!!!
Still not as ah disgusting as the ah dinner scene.
55:49-- "Can somebody tell me... what the fuck this cunt is trying to say?"
Gee, I'd like to know as well, seeing as there aren't any FUCKING SUBTITLES.
That's why I'm using iTunes.
55:24-- AN ANGRY ASIAN MAN... WITH... A GUN...
A film by Nicolas Winding Refn.
Sep 28 - 10:35 PM
54:13-- Not this scene...
Sep 28 - 10:34 PM
Wow! What a jerk. He got his perfectly clean sword dirty.
54:37-- More karaoke...
Strap yourself down for....the torture scene.
Wait a minute...there was no wound in one of those shots!!!!
And yet, there was blood on the sword. Refn logic.
More singing! Why? Because ah Nicky boy Refn thinks you an ah idiot! That's why!
Can someone tell me where he pulls the sword from?
Because he is God in this movie.
Ah...I guess you're right.
53:30-- Sword comes out, so obligatory jungle drums must start.
Sep 28 - 10:33 PM
Now the kids staring
52:31-- AN ASIAN GUY... STARING... AT A KID...
A film by Nicolas Winding Refn.
Sep 28 - 10:32 PM
51:45-- I feel bad for this kid everytime I watch this.
Cus he's so hideous?
Yeah, he had to be in this movie.
Really ugly kid coming up.
Sep 28 - 10:31 PM
He's as ugly as Anne Ramsey.
SHE TRIED TO KILL THE FUCKING GOONIES! And she was mean to Danny DeVito and Billy Crystal.
Am I the only one who laughed hysterically?
Pan beat down?
Nope. I laughed too.
50:00-- Finally something is happening.
This must've been Refn's least favorite scene to shoot. "Not enough staring."- Refn.
I guarantee that by the time the movie's over, we'll have about 400 comments.
This will beat my Deadly Friend running commentary, if it doesn't flat-out double it.
On October 31st, the original Halloween with RC.
Will you be joining me for that?
FUCKING A, BUBBA.
This part with the pan is pretty funny.
Sep 28 - 10:30 PM
50:36-- IT'S A BEATDOWN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. K/O.
Sep 28 - 10:29 PM
Like a boss
Tom Cruise not in this running scene
Sin count 7980 *ding* 7981
48:39-- I'm hopped up on cold meds, guys. So am I just high, or am I actually seeing some of this shit?
I'm sober. Wish I ah wasn't though.
I don't feel good...
Vomiting in 3, 2, 1...
In a ah too much meds way or a ah too much crap movie way?
A little bit of both, lol.
Maybe it's both.
Sep 28 - 10:28 PM
This movie could have ah easily been done and over with in ah 20 minutes.
The trailer was better by far.
Halfway done, ah guys!
Sep 28 - 10:26 PM
Oh, merciful heaven!
Sep 28 - 10:27 PM
46:38-- Damn, she's hot. +2 Tut-o-meter points.
Hellllll yea, nigga.
Then again, she'll probably get raped, walking around Southeast Asia in her panties.
I think she puts them back on. I think that's what the scene implies.
TAKE IT OF!!!!!
46:12-- "TAKE IT OFF!!!!!"
45:35-- "Why do you let her treat you like that?"
"Because she's my mother."
If I had a mom like this, I would have KILLED her by now.
Sep 28 - 10:25 PM
45:30-- My favorite line is coming up...
TAKE IT OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE IT OFFFFFF!!!!
TAKE IT OFF! ROTFL!
My new favorite quote lol
Only laugh in the ah movie coming.
Shes talking about her sons cocks. What?
Sep 28 - 10:24 PM
44:33-- "Billy was everything Julian wanted to be."
Dat wordy exposition.
44:10-- She definitely has screwed her sons.
Refn is such a creep.
44:15-- She is now comparing the respective sizes of her son's penises. WHAT IN THE FUCK IS GOING ON?
Lois Lane approves.
Dick measuring FTW!
Excuse me... (barfing session begins)
Sep 28 - 10:23 PM
43:40-- This woman is a horrible actress.
WHY DO YOU LET HER TALK TO HER LIKE THIS! YOU WEAKLING! SFDJKHFMJLNTYBSDKJRMVFDSRFTMBLDMSFMBDTFIF,GBUMLTREW
Im sorry but Ive had enough. Im gonna go to sleep soon.
42:33-- "How many cocks can you 'entertain' with that cute little cum dumpster of yours?"
Why, again, did he want her to meet his mom?
Sep 28 - 10:22 PM
That's a great question. One Refn never though of.
He wanted to show his mom that she isn't the only woman in his life and that she'll never be the only woman in his life, so he got this chick, had her pretend to be his girlfriend, and he wanted her to meet his mom.
If I had a mom like this... I certainly wouldn't bring people over to see her.
I'll explain why I like OGF in a J-Tylerflix Review.
No, when the movie is over, give us a mini review on this thread.
42:30-- Said the bitch who fucks her sons.
42:12-- Now he's staring in a tuxedo. Shit, son.
*gets the lotion*
Shit's getting real.
41:55-- Dat cinematography.
41:10-- Never mind, we're back to staring.
Sep 28 - 10:21 PM
41:05 I ah despise this upcoming dinner scene in particular.
Oh yes...I hate this scene too.
Am I the onyl one completly lost?
Sep 28 - 10:20 PM
I've seen this film 3 going on 4 times.
No... you are not alone.
Tyler, Nicky boy Refn made this movie to ah confuse us so he can ah feel smart. Nobody understands it because it ah can't be understood.
40:47-- "I'd like you to meet my mother."
Woah... he said something.
40:30-- Here comes the weird shit.
Also, she is very very attractive.
"it's not about money"
*makes a drug deal*
So it is about money.
LMAO, VERY good point.
39:54-- So now this woman is moving cocaine? I thought she was there to see her son...? Fuck it.
39:40-- "You can't go around killing cops anymore."
As if you used to be able to...
Sep 28 - 10:19 PM
Hitman not played by Jason Statham
Sin count: 1436 *ding!* 1437
I'd kill to see CinemaSins do an OGF video.
39:11-- I like to think that all Asian men go out every morning for a daily sword twirling.
But of course!
39:02-- So fucking beautiful.
But so damn pointless.
My favorite scene. I like the music and his sword dance.
Sep 28 - 10:17 PM
Okay, this God-Cop just proved your innocence, and NOW you're stalking him? WTF?
He ah needs to avenge his ah saint of a brother.
Sep 28 - 10:18 PM
35:33-- Finally dialogue!
But it's woodenly acted.
Thoughts, so far ah Diego?
Sep 28 - 10:16 PM
Well, it's not FULL-ON ANUS, because the plot hasn't yet had a chance to cohere.
*Looks at watch*
Oh wait, it's had FORTY FUCKING MINUTES.
35:23-- Interesting stuff here, guys. Gosling has a scar on his left eyebrow. Now, not only does Joe, the main character in the Galaxy Trilogy, has a scar on THAT SAME EYEBROW... but John Tyler recommended Gosling for Joe. The moral of the story: John can FUCKING READ MINDS.
Someone make me join the Justice League!
I recommended Gosling as well.
Okay, I'm really tired and doped up on cold medication... I literally typed 'have' the first time, and then I went back TO FUCKING CHANGE IT TO 'HAS!' I'm losing my mind.
35:23-- Interesting stuff here, guys. Gosling has a scar on his left eyebrow. Now, not only does Joe, the main character in the Galaxy Trilogy, have a scar on THAT SAME EYEBROW... but John Tyler recommended Gosling for Joe. The moral of the story: John can FUCKING READ MINDS.
When you get to the next scene of staring, take a look at this:
"Everything looks beautiful."
OGF reference? Lol.
A bit of a reference.
"Your brother was murdered"
Sep 28 - 10:15 PM
34:43-- Okay, we get it... this guy stares a lot.
Sep 28 - 10:14 PM
huge muscles. What does that have to do with the story.
34:16-- BITCH SLAP.
That's some great sound editing.
33:37-- Uh... suddenly, we have guys who are 99/100ths naked, ladies and gentlemen. Plus another shot of Gosling's hands.
Sep 28 - 10:13 PM
If the plot was as good as the music this movie would be incredible.
Music, good. Cinematography, Great. Everything else? SHIT.
32:00-- So fucking beautiful. The music, the cinematography. oh so, perfect.
Sep 28 - 10:12 PM
These 2 have such great ah chemistry don't they?
They're beautiful together...
I will send someone $100 if they can explain this scene to me.
Asian dudes flex and ah Ryan stares.
Conclusion: they ah shot without a script.
But then the scene just abruptly ends!
Honest trailers should do an OGF video. And then have a montage of all the hand shots.
32:04-- HANDS AGAIN!
Such pretty music and ah camerawork... shame about the ah movie.
31:19-- "Ayll faynd him."
What is this Scottish guy doing here?
Sep 28 - 10:11 PM
This guy talking to his mom is a terrible actor...
HIS FACIAL EXPRESSION NEVER CHANGES!
Yeah, it's stupid. What a shock.
This thread is already one of the most commented-on in all of Robot Jox. And we're only half an hour in.
Sep 28 - 10:10 PM
ha That's awesome.
Everyone has to die via blade in this movie.
29:24-- "Yellow nigger."
So, Asians are now yellow niggers? I suppose Mexicans are brown niggers? Indians are red niggers? Muslims are sand niggers?
Could this movie POSSIBLY get stupider?
"I'm sure he had his reasons."
I guess I shouldn't be surprised considering she fucks her own kids.
Sep 28 - 10:09 PM
YEAH, WHAT THE FUCK?
Our hero, gents. He ah is a mommy's boy who's off to seek revenge for his ah pedo, murderous brother.
28:35-- "Billy raped and killed a 16-year-old girl."
"Well, I'm sure he had his reasons."
"DURP OK MOMMY I GESS YOU RITE!"
That's his mom! Oh lord!
MOM! Stop fondling my asshole!
Sep 28 - 10:08 PM
It's ah even worse with your ah Nic Cage picture.
MOM! Stop fondeling my asshole!
26:52-- There's the Gosling I know and love.
27:00-- Aaaaand it's gone.
Sep 28 - 10:07 PM
27:22-- Yeah... I think this guy has been fucking his mom.
25:57-- INCEPTION! BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, BWAAAAAAAAAAA!!! BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
LOL Goslings face in the hallway...
I'm sure ah in the deep south they ah don't see the problem with this scene.
They feel right at home.
Speaking of which, Leo isn't on anymore, seems like.
The kids love it.
"Ay, mama. That be like us on Thursdays!"
Wow John, how did you like this?
26:13-- More shots of long corridors and hallways.
Sep 28 - 10:06 PM
25:22-- Ryan Gosling, your awesome and all, but can you at least try to emote?
staring into a mirror.
Refn high as f***
Thinking he's Kubrick and s***
Sep 28 - 10:05 PM
25:41-- THERE'S BLOOD ON HIS HANDS. SO MUCH SYMBOLISM.
I have no idea what there saying!
I ah don't know what just happened in the ah shed scene. Maybe one of the ah enlightened Refn fanboys can ah help me.
Sep 28 - 10:04 PM
The dude told them about God-Cop, and Gosling spared his life...for...some reason. And then Gosling had visions of...a sword...yeah.
23:11-- Yeah! Finally something happens! Wait... they CUT OUT THE FUCKING DIALOGUE???????? THE FUCK, REFN???
23:50-- I am Durden's boredom.
Sorry, I just watched Fight Club. Too bad this was the follow-up.
23:02-- "Ask him why he killed my brother."
Well, if your brother is anything like you, fuckhead, I think the reasoning is obvious.
Sep 28 - 10:03 PM
More standing around and starring...and the dog is licking it's balls...
Sep 28 - 10:02 PM
21:38-- Wow, this has great cinematography. Bummer that everything else about it sucks.
Sep 28 - 10:01 PM
So much... stariiiiiiiiiiiiiing
"Whats your problem" This film.
19:55-- MILF ALERT!
Sep 28 - 10:00 PM
Who fucks her sons...
Yeah, I'm gonna go put a drill through her pussy now...
20:28-- WOAH, DIALOGUE! Not only that, but in English, too!
Look guys it's the ah only person who is actually trying to act!
She over-acts though...
Yes but she is ah so much better than everyone else here.
19:48-- Mysterious and dark scene change.
Sep 28 - 09:59 PM
And it's ah time to watch god sing! Take it away!
If God chose to manifest himself in an Earthly form, I doubt he would choose to become a bad Southeast Asian karaoke singer.
19:06-- Karaoke... because fuck logic.
18:31-- Still better than One Direction.
Absolutely. His hair is better, too.
This song is worse than the one in North.
18:26-- Oh, he had a brother? Well, too bad he's dead. Maybe there would have been some emotional impact if we had FUCKING SEEN THE GUY.
Sep 28 - 09:58 PM
He's the ah pedophile.
I know. We didn't even know he excisted.
He was the guy who got killed in the beginning.
He's the ah pedo.
17:57-- WOW. Is he a terminator or something?
This film is terrible.
Is this place supposed to be heaven? Who fucking knows...
17:25-- Don't ever take LSD and tie yourself to a chair.
16:57-- What the fuck just happened?
Sep 28 - 09:57 PM
17:21-- Ryan Gosling is now staring blankly at the camera. What. The. Fuck. Is. Happening.
I'm not sure anyone here right now knows.
17:00-- A HAND. AGAIN.
"God" is ah angry that you wasted a perfectly good hooker.
16:33-- So, does this retard even know HOW to talk?
Sep 28 - 09:56 PM
Nope. In a later scene, he lets his mom talk about his dick size in front of his hooker buddy.
Uh... that's support group-worthy shit right there.
HE'S WALKING TOWARD A DOOR! KUBRICKIAN STUFF RIGHT HERE!
Fuck dem niggas who compare Refn to Kubrick!!
15:36-- OH MAI GAWD THERE STARING ITS SO FUCKING BEYOOTIFUL.
Sep 28 - 09:55 PM
If they ah made a supercut of ah Ryan Gosling staring we'd all be ah all be dead by the end.
15:00-- Dem feels....
12:52-- Oh, boy.
Sep 28 - 09:54 PM
Im sorry but I could care less about this. Im going to bed around 12:30.
EVEN I DON'T WANT TO FINISH THIS.
This is worse than North.
Oh, boy LOL
14:27-- So, he's just watching her finger herself? What?
Yeeeeeuuupppppp...and then he has a vision, or some shit...
Why did I waste more money on this?
Sep 28 - 09:53 PM
I spent 14.99 on this...
You done got ripped off, son.
I spent $8.00
Here we go...the awkward fingering scene...
killed him with a machete.
He pulls a sword out of nowhere...
Don't ah get excited this gets ah unsexy fast.
Yup, looks like heroin.
OR IS SHE TYING THOSE THINGS AROUND HIS ARMS FOR SOME OTHER FUCKING REASON? OH PLEASE, REFN, SAY IT AIN'T SO!!!
Sep 28 - 09:52 PM
12:00-- I'm really not following this at all. Does it make sense? Or am I not alone in realizing that this is just fucking retarded?
Asian guy is ah God. He ah lets the father find his daughter's murderer and ah like ah idiot is surprised when ah kills him.
Is there suppost to be subtitles?
Sep 28 - 09:51 PM
Yes, are you not getting any?
10:55-- That guy went berzerk.
11:19-- OH SHIT, NOW THE ASIAN GUY IS KNEELING. DAMN, SON.
WHAT DID YOU EXPECT HIM TO DO YOU IDIOT?? OF COURSE HE KILLED HIM!
Sep 28 - 09:50 PM
The cinematography is beautiful, but Jesus, is it ever wasted on this garbage...
10:20-- Angry-looking Asian men standing in the rain. So deep.
Too bad there are no subtitles.
The cinematography is beautiful, but Jesus, if it's ever wasted.
Sep 28 - 09:49 PM
8:26-- Dead hooker. So... is there a plot to this movie, or is it just shit like this for 90 minutes?
Sep 28 - 09:48 PM
That's what Im wondering
Nope. No plot. It's a total bullshit movie.
Lol so naive...
8:23 I ah wasn't let down this much by ah meeting "God" since Star Trek 5.
This cop is God, just fyi.
6:00-- What a prick.
Sep 28 - 09:47 PM
7:09-- Aaaand we've been looking at hands for thirty seconds now...
Why does he want to fuck a kid so bad?
That is messed up
6:57-- Still staring at hands.
Not just any hands, Ryan Gosling's hands. *grabs tissues*
What was he kicking? It looked like he was dancing for a second when he broke in to that room with the chicks...
Sep 28 - 09:46 PM
That was uncanny.
5:12-- "I want to fuck a 14 year old"
Yeah, that part shocked the fuck out of me as well.
"I wanna fuck a 14 year old"
Three people walked out of the theater.
5:20-- "Have you got a daughter?"
Sep 28 - 09:45 PM
4:00 Does that statue have a dick? Man, why is my mind looking for penises?
5:17-- "I wanna fuck a 14-year-old."
Oh my god. he wants to have sex with a fourteen year old.
Icky icky ick.
No those are ah men.
"I'm gonna meet the devil
Director's ah cameo?
Sep 28 - 09:44 PM
"Time to make the devil"
What does that even mean? Like, in the context of the film?
2:00 Sounds like Dolphins having sex.
3:30 boxing match
Sep 28 - 09:43 PM
3:34-- JUNGLE MUSIC.
Let me say this again:
Well, except I usually see these RCs to watch the reactions.
Okay. No problem there.
Okay. For a minute, I thought Jeff, Tanny, and Gibson were gonna go ape shit on me and force me to watch the film with them.
2:41-- Our first dialogue is the word 'fight' and Gosling nodding inconspicuously.
Sep 28 - 09:42 PM
Where ah Dolph Lundgren?
2:05-- Hey, people are already getting beaten to a pulp.
You've seen nothing yet.
Sep 28 - 09:41 PM
Nothing screams ah pretenious like ah foreign language title cards in an English ah language movie.
I started it. God, why am I watching this again?
Pretentious foreign language with no subtitles...
This classical music is misleading.
WE'RE OFF! Everybody should start.
Sep 28 - 09:40 PM
Well, except I usually see these RCs to watch the reactions.
Okay, here weeeee go.
I started it.
Sep 28 - 09:39 PM
30 seconds. Everyone stand by.
Apparently, John is on as well. This will be epic.
Tanny signing in.
Sep 28 - 09:38 PM