Sherlock Holmes Quotes

The top Sherlock Holmes quotes selected by the Rotten Tomatoes community. Login to submit a quote!

    1. Sherlock Holmes: Is it poison Nanny?
    – Submitted by Nick M (17 months ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: You've never complained about my methods before.
    2. Dr. Watson: I'm not complaining.
    3. Sherlock Holmes: You're not? What are you right now?
    4. Dr. Watson: How am I complaining? I never complain. When do I complain about practicing your violin at three in the morning? Or your mess, your general lack of hygiene or the fact that you steal my clothes? When do I complain about you setting fire to my rooms?
    5. Sherlock Holmes: Our rooms.
    6. Dr. Watson: The rooms! When do I complain about you performing experiments on my dog?
    – Submitted by Cody H (21 months ago)
    1. Inspector Lestrade: In another life, Mr. Holmes, you would have made an excellent criminal.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Yes, and you an excellent policeman.
    – Submitted by Typhon Q (22 months ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: There's only one case that intrigues me at present. The curious case of Mrs. Hudson, the absentee landlady. I've been studying her comings and goings, they appear most... sinister.
    2. Mrs. Hudson: Tea, Mr. Holmes?
    3. Sherlock Holmes: Is it poisoned, Nanny?
    4. Mrs. Hudson: There's enough of that in you already.
    – Submitted by Typhon Q (22 months ago)
    1. Blackwood: I warned you Holmes, to accept that this was beyond your control, beyond what your rational mind can comprehend.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: What a busy afterlife you're having.
    – Submitted by Typhon Q (23 months ago)
    1. Irene Adler: Why are you always so suspicious?
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Shall I answer chronologically? Or alphabetically?
    – Submitted by Arjun I (23 months ago)
    1. Inspector Lestrade: In another life, Mr. Holmes, you would have made a excellent criminal.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Yes, and you an excellent policeman.
    – Submitted by Nick S (23 months ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Trust me I am a professional.
    – Submitted by Suzanne T (2 years ago)
    1. Dr. Watson: 4 feet tall, no front teeth, and a beard. He's a ginger dwarf.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Midget. You must have concern for those of challenged stature. He's a ginger midget.
    – Submitted by T R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Naturally she misunderstood me! Chamber maids aren't the liberal breed they used to be.
    2. Constable Clark: My wife is a chamber maid.
    3. Sherlock Holmes: Oh.
    – Submitted by T R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Stop complaining.
    2. Dr. Watson: Complaining! How am I complaining? I'm not complaining! I never complain! I don't complain that you practice your violin at three in the morning, that you make a mess of my rooms -
    3. Sherlock Holmes: Our rooms.
    4. Dr. Watson: Our rooms then, I don't complain that you steal my clothes -
    5. Sherlock Holmes: Uh, we have a barter system.
    6. Dr. Watson: I don't even complain that you kill my dog!
    7. Sherlock Holmes: Our dog. Gladstone is our dog.
    8. Dr. Watson: But what I do take issue with is you trying to sabotage my relationship with Mary!
    – Submitted by T R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Don Giovanni is showing at the theatre. I could easily procure two tickets if you were interested in taking someone.
    2. Dr. Watson: [punches him] I knew she had been engaged! She'd told me.
    3. Sherlock Holmes: That would be a no to the theatre then.
    – Submitted by T R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Don Giavonni is playing at the theatre. I could easily procure two tickets if you had anyone interested in going.
    2. Dr. Watson: [punches him] I knew she had been engaged. She'd told me.
    3. Sherlock Holmes: That would be a no to the theatre then.
    – Submitted by T R (2 years ago)
    1. Palm Reader: Ugh, she has a beard!
    2. Sherlock Holmes: What of the warts?
    3. Palm Reader: Ugh, she's covered in warts...!
    4. Sherlock Holmes: ARE THEY EXTENSIVE!?
    – Submitted by Zach W (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: There was never any magic, only conjuring tricks. The simplest involved paying people off, like the prison guard who pretended to be possessed outside your cell. You reputation and the inmates' fear did the rest. Others required more elaborate preparations, like the sandstone slap that covered your tomb. You had it broken before the burial and put together using a mild adhesive. An acient egypcian recipe, I believe. Mixture of egg and honey. Designed to be washed away by the rain. Arranging for your father to drag in his own bathtub required more modern science. Very clever of Reordan to find a paralytic that was activated by the combination of copper and water, and was therefore undetectable once the bathtub water was drained. It put up quite a challenge for me, had he not also tested it in some unfortunate amphibians. The death of Standish was a real mystery, until you used the same compund to blow up the warf. And oddoreless, tasteless, flamable liquid. Yet it burned with an unusual tick issue. Did Standish mistake it for rain as he entered the temple? All it took was a spark. A single rigged bullet in his gun. Ingenious. Like all great preformers, you saved your piece-de-resistrĂ¡nce for the end. A chemical weapon, distrilled from cyanide and refined in the bellies of swyne. Had it worked, your followers in Parliament would have watched unharmed as their colleagues were dying around them. They had no way of knowing you had given them the antidote. Instead they would have believed it was magic and that you had harnessed the ultimate power. And the world would have followed, fear being the most powerful weapon of all. The devil's due a soul, I'd say.
    2. Blackwood: For Godssakes, Holmes, cut me loose!
    3. Sherlock Holmes: First, the world will see you for what you are. A fraud. And then you'll be hanged, properly this time.
    4. Blackwood: There's a long journey from here to the rope... [falls to his death]
    – Submitted by Dave M (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: The storm is coming!
    – Submitted by Pravin P (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Data, Data, Data!
    – Submitted by Pravin P (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: [having been spat upon] This mustn't register on an emotional level. [entering Holmes vision] First, distract target, then block his blind jab. Counter with cross to left cheek. Discombobulate. Dazed, he'll attempt a wild haymaker. Employ elbow block and body shot. Weaken right jaw, then fracture. Break cracked ribs. Traumatize solar plexus. Dislocate jaw entirely. Heel kick to diaphragm. In summary, ears ringing, jaw fractured, three ribs cracked, four broken, diaphragm hemorrhagging. Physical recovery: six weeks. Full psychological recovery: six months. Capacity to spit at back of head: neutralized.
    – Submitted by Facebook U (2 years ago)
    1. Dr. Watson: Let's see then. A Mrs. Ramsey from Hyde Park. Her husband's disappeared.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: He's in Belgium with the scullery maid. Is it November?
    3. Dr. Watson: Yes, Holmes. Lady Radford reports, ooh, her emerald bracelet has disappeared.
    4. Sherlock Holmes: Insurance swindle. Lord Radford likes fast women and slow ponies.
    – Submitted by Facebook U (2 years ago)
    1. Irene Adler: Why are you always suspicious?
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Shall i say it chronologically, or alphabetically?
    – Submitted by Drol R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: That's the Irene I know...
    – Submitted by Connor K (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: This is a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can't tell if a man's dead or not...
    – Submitted by Connor K (2 years ago)
    1. Inspector Lestrade: In another life, you'd have made an excellent criminal.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: Yes, and you sir, an excellent policeman.
    – Submitted by Haroon M (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Case reopened.
    – Submitted by Rodrigo R (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: If the rest of his family's dead, how long do you expect to survive?
    – Submitted by Akheel K (2 years ago)
    1. Blackwood: Death... is only the beginning.
    – Submitted by Andreas K (2 years ago)
    1. Dr. Watson: Get that out of my face.
    2. Sherlock Holmes: It's not in your face, it's in my hand.
    3. Dr. Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
    – Submitted by Jemma J (2 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Madam, I need you to remain calm and trust me, I'm a professional. Beneath this pillow lies the key to my release.
    – Submitted by Benny B (3 years ago)
    1. Dr. John H. Watson: I never complain, when do I complain about you practicing the violin at three in the morning, or your mess, your general lack of hygiene, or the fact that you steal my clothes.
    – Submitted by Benny B (3 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Case reopened.
    – Submitted by Benny B (3 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: You have the grand gift of silence, Watson, it makes you quite invaluable as a companion.
    – Submitted by rob g (3 years ago)
    1. Sherlock Holmes: Head cocked to the left, partial deafness in ear: first point of attack. Two: throat; paralyze vocal chords, stop scream. Three: got to be a heavy drinker, floating rib to the liver. Four: finally, drag in left leg, fist to patella. Summary prognosis: unconscious in ninety seconds, martial efficacy quarter of an hour at best. Full faculty recovery: unlikely.
    – Submitted by rob g (3 years ago)

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