This cockamamy action flick is excruciatingly formulaic -- brimming with spy movie cliches but devoid of the genre's fun, upper-class pretensions.
Simon Sez (1999)
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Reviews Counted:18
Fresh:0
Rotten:18
Average Rating:1.9/10
Runtime: 86 mins
Genre: Action/Adventure
Synopsis: Interpol agent Simon (Dennis Rodman) is working a case against a vicious arms dealer when he runs into Nick, a CIA flunky attempting to deliver ransom and bring home a wealthy client's kidnapped... Interpol agent Simon (Dennis Rodman) is working a case against a vicious arms dealer when he runs into Nick, a CIA flunky attempting to deliver ransom and bring home a wealthy client's kidnapped daughter. It isn't long before the two are entwined in a deadly game of espionage and murder involving the arms dealer, the high-powered father of the kidnapped girl, and Simon's ex-girlfriend (Swedish Supermodel Emma Sjoberg)--whose body is a lethal weapon! [More]
Starring: Dennis Rodman, Emma Sjoberg-Wyklund, Dane Cook, John Pinette
Starring: Dennis Rodman, Emma Sjoberg-Wyklund, Dane Cook, John Pinette, Natalie Cigliuti, Filip Nicolic, Ricky Harris
Director: Kevin Elders
Director: Kevin Elders
Screenwriter: Rudy Cohen
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Reviews for Simon Sez
Dennis Rodman may be a great rebounder, but as a pop-culture icon, he's a one-trick pony.
This on-the-cheap action thriller appears to exist purely as a showcase for the limited talents of self-created caricature Dennis Rodman, who in turn clearly needs to exploit himself while the exploiting is good.
A frenetically junky action adventure that will quickly dribble off to vid stores after a token fast break in theatrical release.
If you must watch it -- and I shudder to imagine the circumstances under which one must -- watch it in a light mood, perhaps under the influence of something.
Neither the Rivera scenery nor the martial arts of Xiong Xin Xin, much less the automotive stunts attributable to Remy Julienne, can lift Simon Sez beyond the very ordinary.
The film's feeble attempts at humor are tedious; like the character of Nick, the film quickly goes from being funny to silly to annoying.
Movies and Rodman would seem to be made for each other, but the pictures will have to start getting better than this one.
If you’re a big Dennis Rodman fan, watch him playing basketball. If you’re not, then you have zero reason to take in this movie.
One of the most awful movies (if you could even call it a movie) this year.
With such sheer ineptitude onscreen it's amazing that this hack job didn't go straight to video.
Me, I'll stick to appreciating Worm Rodman in his true and natural element: the 96-foot hardwood floor.
| Tomatometer Percentage | Movie |
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| 15% 15% | The Ugly Truth |
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| Tomatometer Percentage | Movie |
|---|---|
| 95% 95% | Star Trek |
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