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Speed 2 - Cruise Control Reviews

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Phil H

Super Reviewer

August 2, 2013
'Die Hard on a bus' and now...yep you guessed it 'Die Hard on a boat', well cruise liner. I guess the first thing that instantly jumps out at you here is the fact the film is called Speed 2 but its on a slow moving cruiser liner!. Hardly speed is it, more like err...cruising, I get the feeling they just wanted to use a cruise ship so they could use their highly imaginative tag of 'cruise control'.

Seriously I've read into this and there were some really decent ideas for a follow up. Nothing original of course, they all copied the exact same premise as the original but at least they could offer up some more thrills than a cruise liner. One plot involved a plane that couldn't ascend above 10,000 feet whilst flying through some mountains, kinda daft but sounds better right?.

So this basically really absolutely is a complete 'Die Hard' rip off, it really is. Recently fired crazy ass Dafoe wants revenge on the company (ships computer systems) that wrongfully terminated him because he was ill. So he decides to sabotage one of his own computer systems on board a large expensive cruise liner and steer it into a disaster whilst pinching all the valuables on board. Again at the end of the day he's just after some jewellery, weak. Its pretty much 'Die Hard/Under Siege' with more comedy and way way less blood and violence, actually check that, there is hardly any blood and violence in this, its bordering on PG territory.

Bullock's character has dumped 'Jack Traven' from the first much better film and now she's with the receding hair line of Jason Patric. I guess what's so dumb about this film is firstly Patric just doesn't come across as the hero type, oh sure he's leaping around and trying to be action man every five minutes but the guy just looks anything but. I know heroes don't have to be muscle bound macho men with good hair but Patric? really?? this guy is the wrong kind of actor for a role like this. The other thing that bugs you is the fact his character is such a fudging goodie goodie and always trying to save everyone. Even on board this cruise liner which he knows nothing about, doesn't have a clue where to go and basically shouldn't be poking his nose into anything, he still goes around barking orders at the crew! and they obey him!!! as if!!! in reality they'd tell him to flip off.

Bullock is completely sidelined to virtually a cameo really, she does nothing at all other than offer up terrible dialog attempting to be comic relief. She's even more annoying than in the first film and even more wet (situation aside), in fact the badly portrayed passengers are not as annoying as Bullock. Then you have Dafoe as the villain, well I say villain but he isn't really that evil, he merely switches off all the electrics and gets everybody to evacuate. Would stuff on a ship tend to blow up and cause so much destruction when the electrics go down? seems odd.

Funny thing is if everybody had just gotten off as he demanded in the first place, none of the ensuing mess would of occured!...well almost.

I realise Dafoe's baddie character knows the ship inside out and can control whatever he likes but you always get the feeling he's not much of a challenge. Time and again it seems like he could of been caught plus he also comes across as someone Bullock could beat in a fight. His plan also seems very over indulgent simply for stealing some jewels, takes him half the film to get it set up yet takes him fives minutes to do the deed. He then messes around for no real reason when he could of just gotten away no problem, all this kinda makes the action sequences seem unnecessary and forced.

The film is way more goofy than the first and hardly feels like a real action film at all. There is way too much stupid comedy and idiotic dialog...oh and some awful reoccurring character cameos from the first film which almost make the film into a parody. Even Dafoe's baddie isn't immune to the ridiculous daftness, he contributes with various silly faces to exaggerate the heat of the moment.

The film does look pretty good I can't deny, the ship interiors, exteriors and various CGI shots are nicely done. This all comes to a head in the finale where De Bont takes the opportunity to destroy half a port town by ramming the cruise liner into it purely to show off lots of destruction and fancy effects/models. Even that doesn't really work though because of the awful comic relief which ruins any real tension. This is the films fault all the way through, you never at any point feel nervous or tense despite the fact you're watching an action film about a hijacking. The whole thing is totally juvenile and not in the least bit exciting, and no sticking Patric on a cool motorbike chase sequence at the start doesn't make him look any cooler, just more out of place.
thmtsang
thmtsang

Super Reviewer

July 14, 2007
Not as good as the first movie. This time it's a speeding boat! Good cast.
Chiefilms
Chiefilms

Super Reviewer

March 3, 2008
You can't franchise Speed in cruise control, no sperm in these germs.
DreamExtractor
DreamExtractor

Super Reviewer

April 2, 2011
Mother of god who makes this shit, I would expect this crap from a Adam Sandler film, but Sandra Bullock?
TheDudeLebowski65
TheDudeLebowski65

Super Reviewer

July 15, 2010
Sequel to the awesome Speed, Speed 2 is a terrible film with bad acting, and rehashed ideas. Willem Dafoe is trying his best to prevent this film into sinking, but not even his awesome performance can save this mediocre sequel from crashing. This film seems sloppily made, with pretty cheesy moments and bad acting, script writing. It's a real shame because Willem Dafoe is very good as the villain, but by the films end, not even his great performance can save this film. Thats the only saving grace from this film, Dafoe as the villain. Speed 2 is a train wreck of a film that should've never been made because it really cheapens the first one, which was terrific. Jan De Bont who helmed the first film is trying to keep this afloat, but it fails on so many levels. Speed 2:Cruise Control is one of the sequels ever made. The had an interesting concept for a story, but the execution of the story feels tired, and feels like it doesn't reach potential. Thats the sad thing about this film, it had potential, but the screenwriters didn't focus on the characters, some are very annoying (the deaf girl) and some great (Dafoe's character) Unfortunately this around, the film is way too predictable. Instead of a bus, its an ocean liner. The guy who wrote the script could have added something a bit more consistent to the plot, but he basically reuses old,m tired ideas. Yet at times entertaining, it feels also very stupid.
Albert K

Super Reviewer

September 18, 2010
the definition of a crappy sequel
FilmFanatik
FilmFanatik

Super Reviewer

April 22, 2007
No Keanu? No way.
ScoopOnline
ScoopOnline

Super Reviewer

December 9, 2009
Just great as the prequel with Keanu
Anthony L

Super Reviewer

September 18, 2009
Aka: Speed poo - Flush control
Jason O

Super Reviewer

August 15, 2009
Speed 2 is pretty much just another solid action movie with nothing spectacular. All the actors and actresses do a good job in the acting and the plot is good, but when you compare it to the first Speed, which was one of the best action movies of the decade, Speed 2 is NOTHING. The only thing I saw in Speed 2 that even comes close to comparing with the original Speed is the special effects. The ending sequence and many of the other effects are pretty good. But the suspense and non-stop action are just not there like they were in the first Speed.
To make it short, if you want a good, normal everyday action movie, Speed 2: Cruise Control would be a good movie to get. But if you want an even better movie, one of the best action movies of the decade, check out the original Speed first. NOTE: That was my review from the year 2000. I never have and still don't think Speed 2 is as bad as everyone makes out, and this coming from someone who considers the original to be one of his favorite movies of all time!
deano
deano

Super Reviewer

October 30, 2006
A big, loud, disappointing sequel that wastes the talent of everyone involved in a cruise ship. Director Jan De Bont still pours energy into the effects, but the story and performances lack that polish and care.
Nicki M

Super Reviewer

January 2, 2008
This one I kind of got stuck watching at my mother's house, otherwise no way I would have bothered with it. Okay, well it certainly wasn't a great movie, but I have to say I have seen more boring action movies - this one held my attention, (for the most part), just because it was so stupid and far fetched. Anchor's ripping out of boats like they were paper and let's not even go into the onland out of control boat!! By the end it was definitely an unintentional comedy. As for Sandra
Bullock's hair all through this, bloody hell, don't they pay people to do that?!
DerekA101
DerekA101

Super Reviewer

May 20, 2008
If there was ever a movie that didn't need a sequel, it would be Speed. It was hugely successful... so you know what Hollywood does with a successful idea right?? MILK that cash cow for every dime they can get.

Bad Moves:
-Ultimately, writing this script in the first place.
-Replacing Keanu Reeves with that loser
-Returning only 1 star
-Replacing something as cool and interesting as blowing up a Public Transportation System Bus with blowing up a ...CRUISE SHIP??

This movie is called SPEED right? How fast can a boat go? Who cares if a bunch of rich people blow up? I had empathy for the hostages in the first film, but not in the second. The thrill rides in the 1st were tense, but the sequel was a laughable joke.

Avoid this like the plaque... it is possibly one of the worst movies ever made. Period.
DragonEyeMorrison
DragonEyeMorrison

Super Reviewer

February 7, 2008
"Is like Speed...but with a boat instead of a bus."
skactopus
skactopus

Super Reviewer

May 7, 2007
Speed. Bus on highway. Speed 2: Cruise Control. Boat in ocean. Of all the ideas to make for another speed movie, they choose to use a cruise ship in the ocean. Talk about no suspense. We need to stay above 10 knots or we'll explode. Oh no, another boat. Lets zig and lets zag. We have a problem. The ocean isn't finished. Quick everybody lean to the left and put your head down. I give Keanu Reeves props for not being in this piece of crap. He recognizes a stupid sequel when he sees it. To be honest, I may have given this movie a half star more rating if it was titled something else. Here are a couple of ideas: "Not Speed", "Speed, are you kidding me?", or "Ridiculous Idea."If you notice on the cover it says "Two Thumbs Up!" This is only true if you're standing on your head. Otherwise it would be two thumbs down. Then again, if you are standing on your head you might be crazy enough to actually watch this. The movie may actually seem better from this point of view as well.The first Speed was spectacular and it would be hard for a sequel to top it. So why did they make this? To waste everybody's time. Do yourself a favor and watch something else. I don't even know why I watched this, let alone why I'm even reviewing it. Oh yeah, to help you guys steer clear of the buoy. Watch out! Too late. Ding. What a way to destroy a series.
Dean !

Super Reviewer

June 10, 2007
Slated by crictics and it does get very cheesey towards the end.......however I quite enjoyed the first half. It has a decent bike chase, Dafoe as a great villian (as always!) and Sandra Bullock!
CloudStrife84
CloudStrife84

Super Reviewer

April 12, 2007
Laughable!
Aaron N

Super Reviewer

March 15, 2007
John Geiger: ANNIE! Come back, your my hostage!

It's funny, anytime this movie is on TV, I feel like I don't need to change the channel. It's as if I can just leave this movie on and go about other business in my room with this in the background.

This isn't a good movie, but it's not terrible either. It was clearly made for money, but it doesn't bother me. Even the cast admits that the check they got for this movie went to help them fund personaly projects of there own. It's bad, but it's good at looking bad.

A bus that can't stop. Easy, but it was made to work extremely well. This is a big boat that is kind of going fast, but then it stops for a while, then it goes again, and all kinds of nonsense, and the Willem Dafoe has the evil madman smile, while Sandra Bullock cracks jokes and references the first movie and her old boyfriend Jack who has been replaced by new guy, Jason Patric, who has taken a wild step to be a top billing action star, but only for the money.

It's a run-on sentence, but this is a run-on movie, as long as they have an idea and money, and marketing, they let this role. But still, it's good enough for me to not pay attention to but still have it on.

Oh, and Keanu decided to tour with his band instead of make this movie.
Michael S

Super Reviewer

March 10, 2007
A far cry from the original.
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