I am proud of being a Star Wars fan. From the original classic trilogy and the ill-treated and underrated prequel trilogy to the plethora of rich expanded fiction, Star Wars is my life. When I found out that back in the '70s that there was a Star Wars Christmas Special, I thought ''doesn't sound promising but hey, it's Star Wars, I'll check it out''. Oh, the pain.
This special is so horrendous that even George Lucas regrets being involved in it and has gone to a full extent to make sure nobody watches it. The same guy who added CGI and pointless other changes to the original trilogy and produced Howard the Duck has actually stated that he regrets making this. That's how bad the film is.
There are several things about the Holiday Special that just hurt me. One is that our main heroes have little focus here. Much of the film focuses on Chewbacca's family who are waiting for Chewie to come home for Life Day (a Wookiee Christmas of some sorts). 85% of the film is pretty much focused on them sitting around doing nothing and growling. The worst part is that there are no subtitles to tell the audience what they are saying. Wow, that sounds a lot of fun. Celebrity cameos from Harvey Korman, Bea Arthur and Art Carney are pointless and almost surreal. The budget for this was obviously at Ed Wood levels so for the space battles, they shoved in stock footage from Episode IV. There's a scene where Chewie's father is watching some kind of weird Matrix-like simulation where he masturbates to a human woman. Yeah, that's right. Masturbation in Star Wars, guys. The musical number at the end is horrendous and painful and embarrassing to listen to and for some reason it's to the tune of the Star Wars theme. Mark Hamill, who was in a car accident during post-production on Episode IV, is wearing a hairpiece and eye-liner to hide the fact that his appearance has changed which is a horrible distraction.
The only two good things I can say about this special is this: the first appearance of Boba Fett is pretty cool even if it is animated (dreadfully for that matter) and there are lots of weird close-ups in it. There's also the song by Jefferson Starship which is pretty damn cool even if it has no purpose to be there. Other than that, nothing redeemable at all. At least, the following sequels and prequels to Star Wars ended up being tremendous (except for the Clone Wars movie and the Ewok films, though not as bad as this).
Sadly, I hoped that by watching this, people would forget about their hatred of the prequels and instead view this as the worst thing to happen to Star Wars. To those who think that the prequels are worse than this travesty, quit the meth dudes. Quit the meth!! THIS is the 'raping of Star Wars'.