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The Artist Formerly Known as Tutweiller
Only on Rotten Tomatoes could this post get 129 comments.
Jun 18 - 12:36 AM
Chase: The Lost Trollfighter
This truly is the best crew on the internet.
Jun 18 - 06:24 AM
Jun 17 - 04:33 PM
Jun 17 - 04:34 PM
I'd give it a 10/10 lol.
Jun 17 - 04:37 PM
*slow clap* Replace Emma Stone with Bryce Dallas Howard and that's the best list yet
Jun 18 - 06:18 AM
Jay Cutler (or what ever his name is atm) and Father Magoo (most likely a Jay Cutler account) want to bone (most likely titty fuck) Danny Devito.
Jun 17 - 04:30 PM
If only that were true LMAO
Jun 17 - 04:31 PM
Shantel VanSanten, lol. Though she has not been in a big movie since The Final Destination (2009).
Jun 17 - 04:27 PM
I forgot about Shantel VanSanten. She's a real beauty.
Cutler's 5th Account
Olivia Thirlby is bisexual, sooo..... she might be interested in me and Megan Fox
Jun 17 - 12:41 PM
Well this has grown fast.
Jun 17 - 11:52 AM
Ash J. Gilmore
Christina Hendricks? Anyone?
Jun 17 - 09:58 AM
Wasn't she that annoying cunt in Drive that got her head blown off?
Jun 17 - 09:59 AM
Jun 17 - 10:00 AM
....yeah, I'd do it
Jun 17 - 10:02 AM
Her boobs are way too big.
Not for me. Giggity.
Jun 17 - 10:01 AM
LMFAO. Very true, Jake.
Jun 17 - 10:03 AM
Jun 17 - 10:43 AM
Damn! I can't believe I forgot about her.
She is just... Mmmmmm.
Jun 17 - 09:51 AM
Damn! I forgot about her. Did you see her in Warm Bodies? She was F-I-N-E, FINE in that movie.
Jun 17 - 09:52 AM
Jun 17 - 09:53 AM
Meh. Teresa Palmer was way hotter in that movie
Jun 17 - 09:55 AM
I felt both were equally beautiful.
Not even a little bit
She was much hotter.
Natalie Portman. As a matter of fact, just let me marry her
Jun 17 - 09:39 AM
She is so hot.
Olivia Thirlby, Olivia Wilde, Gabriella Wilde, Emmy Rossum, Jacinda Barrett, Laurie Holden, Radha Mitchell, Ashley Judd, Jane Levy, Keira Knightley, Jessica Chastain, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Kelly Preston, Marg Helgenberger, Sienna Guillory, Ali Larter, Jennifer Lawrence, Marion Cotillard, Rebecca Hall, Emily Blunt, Amy Adams, Natalie Portman, Ayelet Zurer, Heather Graham, Scarlett Johansson, Cobie Smulders, Elizabeth Blackmore, Stana Katic, Amber Heard, and others.
Jun 17 - 09:37 AM
Damn good list (with the exception of Keira Knightley).
Jun 17 - 09:38 AM
What are you talking about? Keira Knightley is practically a goddess amongst mortal women.
Jun 17 - 09:47 AM
She just doesn't do anything for me honestly.
Jun 17 - 09:49 AM
Well, everybody has different tastes.
Jun 17 - 09:50 AM
Man, I almost cried.
If had a threesome, it would be with Juliette Binoche and Rachel Nichols. If my wife had one, it would be with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Ryan Gosling.
Jun 17 - 09:54 AM
At the same time.
Emma Watson, Chloe Moretz, Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice
Jun 17 - 09:09 AM
Maybe if you were 10 years older, you could've........ no wait, you still wouldn't.
Jun 17 - 09:11 AM
I forgot you...XD
I like to bone your P-cat too.
Jun 17 - 09:14 AM
Thanks, that was why I was mad.
Jun 17 - 09:15 AM
Hey J-Law...would you ever do it with a muppet?
Jun 17 - 09:17 AM
Maybe........ if Megan Fox joins
Well, if that's what it takes, then it shall be done.
Shit, even I would get in on that.
Jun 17 - 10:15 AM
Sorry. Btw, what is your favorite color?
Jun 17 - 09:23 AM
Jun 17 - 09:25 AM
Mine is red. Pinkish red.
The color of your dick after you jack off to Eddie Murphy.
Jun 17 - 10:21 AM
The color of your bumhole after a night with In Your Dreams?
Jun 17 - 10:35 AM
It's like he made that post to set himself up for these responses...
Jun 17 - 10:37 AM
These gays are coming out lol...
Jun 17 - 10:41 AM
You're terrible at trolling. Please stop embarrassing yourself
Not an actress but I am the most attractive person I know.
Jun 17 - 05:59 AM
Too bad your movies aren't
Jun 17 - 09:16 AM
A million bucks says you'll end up starring in a movie of his one day
Jun 17 - 09:31 AM
A trillion say I will
Jun 16 - 11:15 PM
and Jane Levy as well
Jun 17 - 05:20 AM
Jun 16 - 11:05 PM
Um, how old are you?
Jun 17 - 09:07 AM
I was about to say that she's underage, but this guy's probably like 12 years old.
Haha Wouldn't be surprised in the least.
Jun 17 - 09:10 AM
Woah, thank god i reread the title
Jun 16 - 09:24 PM
What did you think it was...?
Jun 16 - 09:35 PM
Jun 16 - 09:17 PM
Oh, I see what you did there!!! Did everyone catch that? He tried to insinuate that he would have sex with Father Magoo's mother! Forget about the fact that Father Magoo isn't a real name and I'm sure his mother isn't an actress. Isn't he clever? Wow, you're so clever.
Jun 16 - 09:23 PM
Actually, since Father Magoo is already "Father", Mother Magoo would be Magoo's wife. And boom goes the dynamite
Holy shit, you're right lol. Mind = blown.
Jun 16 - 09:25 PM
There are no female priests in the Church of Magoo. Therefore no women take the name Mother. I know that he is insinuating that he wants to bone my wife, but which one is he referring to?
Jun 16 - 09:33 PM
I was referring to your wife but it seems Chase has limited brain functions. Not his fault though.
Jun 16 - 10:13 PM
Or he was drunk and high. Look around, man.
Jun 17 - 06:14 AM
Yes...drunks and potheads everywhere...I see now.
Jun 17 - 09:05 AM
Yes...drunks and potheads everywhere...I see now. You mix drugs and beer with low IQ and these are the people you get...
You mix beer and a broken condom and John Abella is what you get.
Jun 17 - 09:21 AM
Jun 17 - 09:22 AM
Seriously. John Abella is the poster child for abstinence. Just show his mug in sex education. I guarantee teen pregnancies would go down.
"Kids, THIS could happen to you."
Jun 17 - 09:26 AM
That's fucking mint, dude! LMFAO
Jun 17 - 09:28 AM
And then after the kids compose themselves from their tears of fear, the teacher would show them a picture of John's alter ego, Matthew Preston. They would have to lock the windows because I guarantee some students would attempt to take nosedives out of the window, simply because of the mind numbing horror.
That's amazing. I want to reply something just as funny, but I just can't lol
Jun 17 - 09:35 AM
Lol Your posts are pretty hilarious, Mr. Gilmore. They crack me up everyday. Just returning the favor.
Jun 17 - 10:14 AM
Thanks, Mr. Nyland. And same to you, your jokes were so funny they gave me heartburn the other day LMFAO.
Jun 17 - 10:19 AM
Lol I hope you had Tums!
Jun 17 - 10:36 AM
Nope. I just had to soldier through it. Haha
Jun 17 - 10:38 AM
Lol I thought I was only able to give heartburn to my ex girlfriend.
Jun 17 - 10:42 AM
My Ex-Girlfriend is a bitch, man. She keeps trying to get back with me, but I think the only reason I liked her is because 1. She liked Star Wars and 2. She was hot lol
Jun 17 - 10:47 AM
She isn't peeling this banana anytime soon, no sir.
Jun 17 - 10:48 AM
Good man! My ex finally moved to Georgia, so I don't hear from her anymore. She kept trying to convince me that she wanted to be friends with benefits but every time I gave that a try, she tried to force dinner dates and trips to New York to see her family. The sex wasn't good enough to put up with that nonsense lol.
Jun 17 - 11:13 AM
I feel you, man. Actually I don't, but I know what you mean lol
Jun 17 - 11:15 AM
Lol I find that Russian women and Latinas are the best in bed.
Jun 17 - 11:17 AM
Your dick spans the globe, man. LMFAO
Jun 17 - 11:18 AM
I just get lucky and find them in the city lol.
Jun 17 - 11:21 AM
Jun 17 - 11:22 AM
Stop Chase, your similarities to me are getting creepy
Last year I was like a fucking chick repellent, but this year all these girls are trying to hop aboard the Winding Gilmore Train. What the fuck? lol
Jun 17 - 11:23 AM
Lol how so, Jake?
And that's good news, Gilmore! Get Lucky by Daft Punk is now your theme song.
Jun 17 - 11:26 AM
LOL I guess so, man. Haha
Jun 17 - 11:29 AM
You have good taste in music as well haha.
Jun 17 - 11:33 AM
As do you, Chase. I've had Memory Tapes in my head for days now lol
Jun 17 - 11:34 AM
I'm listening to Safety right now!
Jun 17 - 11:36 AM
Fuck yeah, man! I'm listening to Pacific Coast Highway at the moment.
Jun 17 - 11:37 AM
I fucking love that song.
Jun 17 - 11:40 AM
Whenever I work out I put on some Kavinsky and I feel fucking invincible. Haha
Jun 17 - 11:41 AM
I do the same thing with Com Truise. Check him out, too. He's incredible.
Jun 17 - 11:44 AM
His names Com Truise? I like him already lol
Jun 17 - 11:45 AM
Yeah lol. Very similar to Kavinsky. Brokendate is my favorite song by him.
Jun 17 - 11:46 AM
I'm 41 seconds into the song (Brokendate) and I already love it lol
Jun 17 - 11:49 AM
It's awesome, right?!
Jun 17 - 11:50 AM
Yeah, dude. It has cool 80's euphoric feel to it.
Indeed. There are so many incredible artists out there that it's hard to keep up with them all. I love music.
Jun 17 - 11:54 AM
I used to be into music, but then it all got so commercial and shitty so I gave up on it. But you'r starting to get me into it again
Jun 17 - 11:56 AM
Empire of the Sun
Toro Y Moi
The Radio Dept.
Black Moth Super Rainbow
Check these bands out whenever you feel like hearing some new tunes. You won't be disappointed.
Jun 17 - 12:23 PM
Slowly but surely listening to one song by each artist lol. I love M83
Jun 17 - 12:40 PM
M83 is amazing. Let me know what you think!
Jun 17 - 12:44 PM
Totes magoats, man! lol
Jun 17 - 12:46 PM
You should check out a guy named, ADoseOfBuckley on YouTube he gives rants about current events and is absolutely hilarious.
Jun 17 - 12:51 PM
Please remove yourself from society.
Signed, Your Friendly Neighborhood Trollfighter.
Jun 16 - 09:36 PM
Jun 16 - 09:16 PM
That comment made my laugh out loud.
Jun 17 - 05:47 AM
Keep makin' movies Bay! You rock!
Jun 17 - 09:00 AM
Jun 16 - 09:18 PM