Ted Reviews
Daily Star
MacFarlane is reduced to making increasingly laboured references to the 1980s.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
The Aristocrat
A film with Ted's ingredients should have you stone-drunk on laughter but this film is the comedic equivalent of pissed-in light beer: its 2.5% funny.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
We Got This Covered
I enjoyed and laughed at Ted, but I can't say I liked it; MacFarlane lacks focus, the jokes are occasionally offensive, and though the movie has heart, it bungles whatever message it's trying to get across.
Full Review
| Original Score: 6.5/10
Slate
It is funny to watch a teddy bear wail on Mark Wahlberg. But afterward, I mostly felt beat up.
Top CriticSome of this is undeniably funny, but the humor is very hit-or-miss.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/4
Boston Phoenix
Ted, which was conceived as an animated series, suffers the flaws of Family Guy without sharing its strangeness.
Moviedex
Fluctuating between crass and sentimental without being particularly impressive at either, Ted wears out its welcome very, very fast.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
The Ooh Tray
Less a movie, more a ragbag of 80's pop cultural references hung on a storyline.
Quickflix
It left me fantasising of ways to go back in time, Lost style, and keeping Family Guy from ever returning to screens and kicking off this terrible chain of events.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
Sarasota Herald-Tribune
Ted contains 12-15 minutes of the some of the best comedy I've seen in a movie this year. Now see if you can stand the other 90.
Full Review
| Original Score: 3.5/5
Ultra Culture
Feel free to tell me to lighten up and get a sense of humour, but it's also worth asking whether it's humour that really drives Ted's nasty streak.
McClatchy-Tribune News Service
You know what's funny? Seth "Family Guy" MacFarlane making fun of Adam Sandler movies. F-Bombs, lame celebrity cameos, gay jokes, drug jokes. Take away the animation and MacFarlane IS Adam Sandler.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1.5/4
Metro Times (Detroit, MI)
Fans of the MacFarlane oeuvre will be tickled; everyone else would be advised to sample Family Guy, among other shows, to see if they really, really need to see his sensibility - with curse words included.
Full Review
| Original Score: C+
Like "Family Guy," "Ted" is only about its own hyperlinked pop culture references.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/4
Everything goes on too long -- Ted's carousing, Lori's watchful waiting, John's wistful indecision.
Florida Times-Union
A pot-smoking, womanizing, wisecracking, profanity-spewing teddy bear is, as you might figure, good for a lot of laughs. Trouble is, the rest of 'Ted' is pretty listless.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/4
Moviedex
When Ted isn't funny, it isn't much of anything. It's the sip of water a stand-up comedian takes between jokes, leaving the audience to twiddle their thumbs as they wait for the next one.
Full Review
| Original Score: 3/5
CNNRadio
Sorry, but I could bearly stomach Ted. Give me a good gross-out comedy any old day, but this one ain't funny.
Full Review
| Original Score: D
St. Louis Post-Dispatch
The plot is simply a shaky frame on which to hang drug and sex jokes and numerous pop-culture references.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1.5/4
Doddle
By the third act, the thin premise collapses and the film runs out of steam, bringing in jarring elements that don't work with a light Peter Pan comedy/fantasty.
Full Review
| Original Score: 5/10
Liverpool Echo
A deliciously foul-mouthed comedy that employs the magic of digital trickery to bring to life one rotund stuffed bear as a buddy for a lonely boy.
