Critics hate bad movies just as much as you do. The difference is, they can tell the world why. (And there's always a little more sizzle when one deeply, truly, reviles a film.) See who hated Speed Racer, who had to sit through The Hottie & The Nottie, and how Ben Stein captured the wrong kind of attention from one of America's favorite critics!
The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (63% Tomatometer)
Being so British that the Nazis danced to English music hall tunes and called each other "leftenant" just made it tone deaf kitsch. Turning the Holocaust into an SS family tragedy made it moral imbecility of the lowest order.
-- Bob Strauss, L.A. Daily News
College (6% Tomatometer)
There were more inept films in 2008 -- Strange Wilderness and Nobel Son leap to mind -- but no film seemed more contemptuous of humanity as a whole, and young people and women specifically, than this grimy "comedy" about three high school seniors who spend a weekend getting hazed by fraternity brothers. That a woman directed this disgusting mess is disappointing; that a movie this wretched could get a nationwide release is depressing.
-- Alonso Duralde, MSNBC.com (Read Alonso's full list here)
Postal (8% Tomatometer)
Director Uwe Boll actually revels in being reviled, so it's somewhat anticlimactic to dub his latest video game adaptation the year's worst. But Postal is bad even by Boll standards -- it's barely based on the video game of the same name, instead aiming to be some kind of grab bag satire of current events, pop culture and everything else that floats through Boll's twisted, overeducated imagination (he allegedly holds a doctorate in literature). If it weren't so boring and amateurish...it would be inconceivably offensive. Sign the petition: www.stopuweboll.org.
-- Wade Major, Box Office Magazine
The Hottie & The Nottie (5% Tomatometer)
Choices for the worst movie of the year are a cinematic cesspool of flotsam and jetsam including instant IQ-reducers like Over Her Dead Body, Seed, You Don't Mess With the Zohan and The Hottie & The Nottie. Funny how one of my favorite movies has Paris Hilton in it, as does (predictably) the worst. The Hottie & The Nottie is a awfully-acted, stupidly-scripted, direly directed splash of swill that only makes me appreciate the good ones that much more. I'd rather splash pure bleach in my eyes than see it again.
-- Staci Layne Wilson, Horror.com/Sci Fi Weekly
Repo! The Genetic Opera (30% Tomatometer)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (76% Tomatometer)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull earns the #1 spot because it ranks as the most disappointing movie in years. How could Steven Spielberg, George Lucas and Harrison Ford wait 20 years for the right script to make Indy 4 and end up with this? Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is predictable, unimaginative, derivative of its predecessors - not celebratory - and - I can't believe I'm saying this - incomprehensible.
-- Ben Mankiewicz, At the Movies
Baghead (77% Tomatometer)
Being one's own editor allows a person to be very selective about what they see. Baghead is the worst of the films I saw this year, not just because did not see as many films in 2008 as I normally would, but because of how much better it could have been but wasn't. Even at a mere 84 minutes, it was still an hour too long, with some of the worst acting from allegedly professional thespians, lazy camerawork and an all-around lack of enthusiasm from everyone involved.
The Love Guru (14% Tomatometer)
It was probably around the time that Oscar-winning, classically-trained actor Sir Ben Kingsley, playing a guru with a name that is a crude joke about solitary sex, dunks a mop in a bucket of urine for his acolytes to use in a sort of pee-soaked dodge ball game, that I began to feel confident I was watching the worst film of the year. To be truly, epically bad a movie must waste the talents and severely tarnish the reputations of highly respected and previously reliable performers. Add in constant but never funny body-part and bodily-function jokes, an uninteresting story, and a character whose only job seems to be to do what the audience doesn't and laugh at the star and you can actually feel brain cells melt as you watch.
-- Nell Minow, Belief.net (See Nell's Top 10 list here)
Towelhead (47% Tomatometer)
As its openly racist title implies Towelhead is an exploitation movie that wears its shock value on its guilty sleeve. It is the most disgusting, ethically reprehensible, and irresponsible film to come out of the 21st century's first decade. As Roger Ebert said of the film Dirty Love, this movie "wasn't written and directed; it was committed."
-- Cole Smithey, ColeSmithey.com (Read Cole's full list here)
Speed Racer (36% Tomatometer)
Because we all expected so much more and they spitefully let us all down. Even the children! It's an ugly cartoon with squandered money and talent by the once highly-respected Wachowski Brothers. Was the true purpose to make a movie no one would see? The cast is crucified by cruel camera work. And I hated the fat kid brother and especially the chimp, who the mom liked more than her children.
-- Victoria Alexander, FilmsInReview.com
Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed (10% Tomatometer)
A defense of "intelligent design" and an attack on Darwinians that could be used as a case study of irrational reasoning. But such a doc would be fair enough, just like some of Michael Moore's stretchers, if it didn't try to link modern evolution scientists with Hitler and the Holocaust. Hosted by Ben Stein, who should be ashamed of himself. I wrote a blog about it, which so far has attracted 940 comments, some of them longer than the entry, very few giving a good impression of the defenders of ID.
-- Roger Ebert, RogerEbert.com (Read Roger's Best of 2008 list here)
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FinalDestination019 writes: on Dec 29 2008 06:14 PM I knew The Hottie and the Nottie would be on here! I knew it. Didn't expect The Boy in the Striped Pajamas though... I think the worst film of the year was Disaster Movie. How the hell is it not on here? (Reply to this) |
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oddjob323 writes: on Dec 29 2008 06:15 PM I'm sort of surprised Benjamin Button, with a tomatometer of only 73%, is so beloved by critics. (Reply to this) |
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Glenn W. writes: on Dec 29 2008 06:17 PM what, no room on the Worst of 2008 for Disaster Movie? (Reply to this) |
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steve s. writes: on Dec 29 2008 07:19 PM thank you ben mankiewicz, kingdom of the crystal skull was pitiful. any critic who claimed to love it should have to publicly admit that they are a pathetic spielberg suck up/boot licker (Reply to this) |
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isotonic writes: on Dec 29 2008 07:20 PM Where's Wall-E? (Reply to this) |
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thereign writes: on Dec 29 2008 07:20 PM Benjamin Button is not as good as critics are saying. It was very pedestrian in many ways, and the story arc of Ben's love for Daisy almost exactly mirrors that of Forrest Gump and Jenny. Guess that's what happens when you have one of the writers of Gump on the project--you get repetition. (Reply to this) |
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polyrhythm07 writes: on Dec 29 2008 07:42 PM Really? Wall*E is nowhere to be found? :( (Reply to this) |
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BathHouse writes: on Dec 29 2008 07:44 PM Yeah, where the hell is WALL-E? And Benjie is listed 3x, nice going webbies. (Reply to this) |
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carl the critic writes: on Dec 29 2008 08:27 PM Milk? (Reply to this) |
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thunderstruck560 writes: on Dec 29 2008 08:32 PM The good list is missing Wall-e and Milk and Iron Man (which kicked the dark knight's ***) and the bad list is missing disaster movie and eagle eye and the happening. Hey I liked speed racer. I thought it was an alright movie as was the love guru. (Reply to this) |
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ARTaylor writes: on Dec 29 2008 08:42 PM Definitely agree with Ben Mankiewicz that Indy 4 was incredibly disappointing. Especially after hearing that they went twenty years for just the right script just to get the Close Encounters aliens. To anyone complaining about something appearing or not appearing on any list: It's only opinions. I could search through hundreds of Top and Worst lists of 2008 and find just about every movie on both lists. And I'm sure the critics would have plenty to say why The Dark Knight was awful and/or why The Day the Earth Stood Still was so wonderful. It's all relative. I could probably find some Top list with Clone Wars on it. That's why I go by box office numbers, Tomatometer, or most importantly of all my own personal opinion. My personal top five list: 5-Kung Fu Panda 4-Wall-E 3-Tropic Thunder 2-The Dark Knight 1-Iron Man (Reply to this) |
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rt_hire_me writes: on Dec 29 2008 08:50 PM Wall-e is on Ebert's top ten. Worst movie that got a positive tomatometer: Nick and Norah's Infinite Sucklist. I went to the theatre maybe 7 times last year (too $$$ive), and I can't believe I wasted a trip on that one. Very, very aggravating. I thought I could trust you, Tomato Gods! (Reply to this) |
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TombstoneLawDog writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:03 PM These are pretty good, and I agree with them for the most part (haven't seen 'Button' and a couple of the movies on the 'worst' list). I can't agree enough about Speed Racer. I was had contempt for the film, in the sense much like this guy had; SOOO much was wasted on this film. SUCH a pathetic, schizophrenic cartoon. If 'Matrix' wasn't on my all-time top 5, I'd pity the Wachowskis and condemn them as eternal hacks. I avoided 'Love Guru' based upon what I read, so I'm curious to see if it's as bad as folks say when it comes out on cable. I simply can't see how, given the hammering it's getting. 'Hottie/Nottie' ...I believe it. Then again, I've wanted to see that dirty porn toy thrown out of celebrity status for years. (Reply to this) |
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DarthWonka writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:12 PM Or you could avoid Love Guru based solely on every commercial and trailer looked god awful. I mean, who really needed reviews to see that the thing was going to be a piece of ****e? (Reply to this) |
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Thesar writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:15 PM I solely agree with Indy 4 on worst list - I didn%u2019t think George could stoop lower than Star Wars Ep1. But what's missing from the bottom barrel list: The Happening, 88 Minutes, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Deal, Jumper, Funny Games, Hancock, Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa.. I could name others that I think would%u2019ve sucked (i.e. Meet Dave & Any Movie Spoof - Meet the Spartans/Superhero Movie), but these are only ones I've seen and landed in bottom 3rd of my list of 2008. (Reply to this) |
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arendr writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:35 PM In reply to this comment (#2213818) Glad to see someone agrees with me on Benjamin Button. (Reply to this) |
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wordweaver12 writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:47 PM ...and what do these critics know? seriously? they bring their excess baggage of cultural influences, biases and favorites and yet we adhere to what they think? critics whose opinions are predetermined by media machines? PLEASE!! (Reply to this) |
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Mr. Bo Ziffer writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:51 PM I can't believe Postal only got one "Worst" pick. If Benjamin Button can get three "Top Movie" picks, then Postal should at least get five more. That tomatometer is ten percent too high. But, it's just opinions after all. And where is The Happening? Speed Racer may have been way too noisy and obnoxious, but at least that didn't have Marky Mark being out-acted by a plastic plant, or lines like "Cheese and crackers!" (Reply to this) |
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CoUcH ToMaToE DoUgIe writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:51 PM In reply to this comment (#2213934) thunderstruck- no movie this year was better than the Dark Knight that I could say it "kicked ***" over it. Plenty were better-the Wrestler, MILK, Frost/Nixon, Benjamin Button, Slumdog millionare. Still, I believe Nolan's work was so splendid that it holds it own among these slighty superior yet loftier films. I know its your opinion, thunderstruck, yet I find it hard to imagine how you felt Iron Man was that better than Dark Knight. Still, if anyone cares{and i know no one does} my favorite movies included those Oscar caliber films I mentioned before plus the wide-released blockbusters Dark Knight, Iron Man, Kung Fu, Pineapple Express and Wall*E. Finally, I agree with the majority of the RT community with the shock and anguish over the exclusion of Diaster Movie in the worst films of the year. Also, I'm dissapointed to see so many fresh films designated as the worst films of the year. I'm sorry but Indy 4, Baghead or the Boy In Pinstripe Pajamas were not that bad and don not deserve such awful recognition. Even Speed Racer, which I know is a favorite of Rotten Tomatoe's Ms. Jen Yumato, IS NOT deserving to placed on such a lowly ranking with such rotten films like the Love Guru and the Hottie and Nottie. Speed Racer was an experience worth watching and wan't too bad when I look bad on it. Its groundbreaking visuals alone should keep it off this dubious list. (Reply to this) |
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MizzleBrizzle writes: on Dec 29 2008 09:59 PM Benjamin Button, to me, is a technically competent movie, but it has no depth or resonance. The main characters make their decisions for no reasons whatsoever, and you are left empty, wondering why this premise wasn't truly mined. I got the feeling that they were drawing on the cliches that you saw in biopics like Ray, making a person's entire life into a love story, and it really doesn't work, nor will it ever. Love is nullified by death, or if it isn't then you need to present a strong cinematic argument why not, as opposed to a few pop culture platitudes. (Reply to this) |
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