You'd be challenged to laugh once during a two-hour-plus slog in which much of the intended hilarity resides in frequent utterances of the F-bomb, venison and Wham! posters.
| Original Score: C-
Probably should have just focused on the Chris Pratt and Alison Brie characters.
| Original Score: C+
I would have preferred to spend five years in the dungeon in Silence of the Lambs...putting the lotion on the skin...before I get the hose again.
| Original Score: 1/5
The waiting is the hardest part.
| Original Score: 2/5
It's just not quite funny enough to justify its length. Something is just off.
| Original Score: 2.5/5
As endearing as Segel and Blunt are, The Five-Year Engagement feels ... five years of your life spent waiting for the inevitable, with not as many laughs along the way ...
What happens after that romantic rooftop marriage proposal that would ordinarily end a rom-com? Sadly the answer seems to be drab and not terribly interesting.
The Five-Year Engagement is a fun, intelligent 100-minute rom-com trapped in a two hour rough cut.
There's just no economy of words or plotting or pacing here, and that's a shame. (Full Content Review for Parents also available)
Overlong and curiously (wait for it) unengaging.
Plays like a five-episode, R-rated story arc from "How I Met Your Mother." With more profanity and more explicit sex. And considerably less drinking. And no Neil Patrick Harris.
| Original Score: 1.5/4
Instead of being a 90-minute, three-act romantic comedy, this 124-minute plod almost begins to feel like a five-year term at its midpoint low.
Some of the comedic material provokes laughter and some doesn't, but nearly all of it feels wrong. It's as if the jokes have been shoehorned into the movie because it was deemed too dramatic.
| Original Score: 2.5/4
Sometime around what I guessed to be the one-hour mark in "The Five-Year Engagement," I checked my watch and honestly thought the battery had given out.
There might be a passable movie in here somewhere, but you would need to do a lot of editing to find it.
| Original Score: 2/4
There are some good laughs in this protracted engagement story, but the pacing is all wrong and despite the charms of Emily Blunt, the film just runs out of gas.
| Original Score: B-
In a nod to Segel's chef Tom, the film engages in the pasta theory of filmmaking: Throw enough starch against the wall, and something's bound to stick. Some appetizing bits, yes, but not enough.
| Original Score: 5/10
A bumpy entertainment about a bumpy road to the altar, this overly long rom-com offers up a couple of laughs, a thought or two and a lot more extraneous stuff.
Segel and Stoller could - no, should have been bolder: their leading lady deserves it.
A little restraint would have gone a long way to making this a far funnier, fleeter affair.