The Thing Reviews

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MaryAnn Johanson
Flick Filosopher
December 1, 2011
[A] useless, entertainment-free xerox copy of John Carpenter's 1982 film of the same name... Van Heijningen has never made a feature film before, and, I would argue, he still hasn't...
Phelim O'Neill
December 1, 2011
Whatever good intentions were behind this prequel to John Carpenter's 1982 classic, the sloppy execution renders them moot.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Alan Jones
Radio Times
December 1, 2011
Tense, smart and suitably gruesome, this certainly delivers the goods.
Full Review | Original Score: 4/5
Tim Robey
Daily Telegraph
December 1, 2011
It's curious that a movie about a shape-shifting, person-imitating alien lifeform should itself feel like a mutant hybrid: half-prequel, half-remake, never sure which end to cosy up to.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Ashley Clark
Little White Lies
December 1, 2011
Nary an original bone in this monster's body, but effective nonethleless.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Elliott Noble
Sky Movies
November 30, 2011
Schlock lovers and Friday night thrill-seekers are disgustingly well served. Best skip that tray of gooey nachos, though.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Matthew Turner
November 30, 2011
Never quite lives up to Carpenter's version, though it's entertaining enough, thanks to a superb performance from Mary Elizabeth Winstead and some satisfyingly gloopy visuals.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Shaun Munro
What Culture
November 30, 2011
Despite its visual sophistication and a good lead performance, there's no escaping that this Thing is a pointless remake trying to convince itself that it is in fact a prequel.
Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/5
James O'Ehley
Sci-Fi Movie Page
November 29, 2011
Critics were wrong about the original movie back in 1982. They wrong about this one too!
Top Critic
Trevor Johnston
Time Out
November 29, 2011
Efficient enough for newcomers perhaps, but never that chilling, and the predictably dull CGI underlines how far movie magic has regressed in the past couple of decades.
Full Review | Original Score: 2/5
Felix Vasquez Jr.
Cinema Crazed
November 29, 2011
A colossal mess and a general spit in the face of everything John Carpenter set forth with his 1982 masterpiece.
Chris Hewitt (UK)
Empire Magazine
November 28, 2011
By no means the finessed work of a Carpenter; more an enthusiastic DIY expert who read the instructions once and reckons he can manage.
Full Review | Original Score: 3/5
Bruce Bennett
Spectrum (St. George, Utah)
November 8, 2011
Not an improvement on John Carpenter's groundbreaking 1982 original, but sufficiently horrific, tense and well-paced, and aided by minor changes and current technology.
Full Review | Original Score: B
Walter Chaw
Film Freak Central
October 30, 2011
The great irony of The Thing-quel is that, as an imitation itself, it's a uniquely unconvincing simulacrum of the thing it's trying to ape.
Full Review | Original Score: 1.5/4
Diva Velez
October 30, 2011
Consisting of a few shock pops and queasy effects, The Thing is tired, rote and uninspired, becoming a waiting game to see who gets knocked off next. There's nothing here not seen before, including in its superior 1982 sire.
Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/5
Eric Melin
October 27, 2011
Great care has been taken to not fill this movie full of lame, jittery camera angles and a faster-than-necessary pace, which is nice. It's just too bad that Mary Elizabeth Winstead is dull as dishwater.
Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/4
Steve Persall
Tampa Bay Times
October 26, 2011
This Thing is purely for the gorehounds, and they aren't likely to leave impressed. It takes a while for the blood and goo squibs to start gushing... When you've seen one mutilated corpse used like an extraterrestrial hand puppet you've seen 'em all.
Full Review | Original Score: D
Tim Brayton
Antagony & Ecstasy
October 22, 2011
Studio-produced fan fiction that indulges in an intensely close, even fetishistic extension of all the hints and details given in the original film, but misses the forest for the trees.
Full Review | Original Score: 4/10
Louise Keller
Urban Cinefile
October 22, 2011
From its isolated icy setting to its chilling premise and heart-pumping execution, this prelude to John Carpenter's 1982 classic sci-fi horror film of the same name is a ripper
Ken Hanke
Mountain Xpress (Asheville, NC)
October 22, 2011
It's easy enough to sit through, it'll be even easier to forget in a few weeks.
Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/5
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