The film may have its fun moments but this adaptation does nothing more than make these Three Musketeers look like a bunch of Stooges.
| Original Score: 5/10
While you're busy looking at the special effects, you'll begin to notice that there's not really anything in the way of substance like a well-thought-out plot and characters that you care about.
| Original Score: 2.5/4
Special effects and 3-D fail to add anything new to this radical, and unsuccessful shake-up of the classic story.
Director Paul W.S. Anderson orchestrates his Musketeers with the rhyme and reason of a confetti popper.
| Original Score: 2/5
Think the attitude of Pirates of the Caribbean franchise combined with the energy of Anderson's Resident Evil series -- with careless comedy and pantomime pageantry thrown in.
The actors should have remained dry-docked instead of shipping out on this big, bloated Three Muske-mess.
It wouldn't be the end of the world if these sword-fighting ciphers returned. It would just feel like it.
| Original Score: C
Too many characters, too many plotlines, too little wit. Anderson throws everything at the wall, but ultimately none of it sticks.
A pretty straightforward attempt to pick up any slack left by the tiring Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. That's to say, it's preposterous panto for the kiddies.
A befouling of Dumas.
| Original Score: 1/4
Jovovich tries hard to be terribly, terribly wicked, but her performance finds a hitherto unknown middle ground between Divine in Pink Flamingos and Halle Berry in Catwoman that's just embarrassing.
Seriously: What the hell?
It has more to do with trying to remake Pirates Of The Caribbean in France than with filming Dumas' novel.
Alexandre Dumas isn't merely turning in his grave, he's half way through re-enacting 'Thriller'.
| Original Score: .5/5
An editorial mess, an atonal wreck, and a huge waste of cash from inception to release.
| Original Score: 1.5/5
Unfortunately, it's Logan Lerman's D'Artagnan and Milla Jovovich's Milady de Winter who get the largest portions of screen time, and both are like nails on a chalkboard.
| Original Score: 3.5/10
To be consistent with his previous efforts, Anderson deploys a relentless stream of fight sequences that revert to nauseating and outmoded slow-mo during moments of supposedly heightened tension.
| Original Score: 1/5
It's a lot more fun than the most recent hatchet-faced entry in the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, but it's also exasperatingly slapdash.
Completely impossible to understand, a dumb movie that makes you feel dumb.