The Watch Reviews
The Patriot Ledger
Rote, crass and worst of all, totally laugh-free, it inspires you to exact your own brand of vigilante justice.
Full Review
| Original Score: D-
Concrete Playground
Light entertainment at its lightest, The Watch does at least elicit some laughs.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
Daily Star
For a flabby 101-minute movie, the gag hit rate is alarmingly low.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
ScreenRant
The Watch is a lazy production at nearly every level. Expect these aliens to have better luck in a couple years - when they invade basic cable.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
The Aristocrat
The only arcs these characters encounter are in their pants.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
We Got This Covered
The Watch is an utterly soulless, lazy, painfully dull affair. It is not a film. It is a product, and an awful one. This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen.
Full Review
| Original Score: 0/10
Film Journal International
A talented cast shines brightly, but can't carry the weight of this under-inspired sci-fi frolic.
Daily Telegraph
All the bromancing back-slapping can't hide the quartet's crippling lack of screen chemistry, while frights, and laughs, are non-existent.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1/5
Examiner.com
"The Watch" is so focused on making vulgar comments and developing in-depth vulgar conversations and situations that nothing else really feels like it was developed properly; the entire experience is equivalent to excruciating torture.
Full Review
| Original Score: 3/10
Schmoes Know
The first half of this movie might make you laugh but it's very sloppy. I saw this a few months ago when it was a much better film called Attack the Block.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2.5/5
Irish Times
There's nothing particularly offensive about the piece. But its intergalactic badness does take the breath away.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1/5
Top CriticA film packaged as pure product, aiming to snare the combined markets for loudmouth comics, sci-fi action and, er, Richard Ayoade - who, however seemingly misplaced, is the freshest thing here.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
American Profile
It's amazing how much thought, effort and creative energy "The Watch" works into its script about human---and space-alien---crotches.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1.5/5
HeyUGuys
Off-the-production-line comedy, marketed as a sci-fi fan-boy's lighter bit of fluffy entertainment. And the aliens - seen them, zapped them all before.
Full Review
| Original Score: 1/5
Screen It!
You can see what all concerned were going for here, and you can lament where they came up short (Full Content Review for Parents also available)
Las Vegas Weekly
Piles on the shrill vulgarity but sticks with its toothless emotional lessons, leaving it with the worst of both worlds.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
Fan The Fire
If the scenes between the four leads had been stronger, it might have been easier to overlook the film's structural and tonal weaknesses, but as it happens they only rescue it in dribs and drabs.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
Metro Times (Detroit, MI)
The fusion of high concept and lowbrow humor is initially amusing, but becomes unwieldy as the movie shifts into action mode and the explosions threaten to overwhelm the laugh lines.
Full Review
| Original Score: C
The Sunday Age
This little-green-men mash-up shows that in space, no one can hear you laugh.
Full Review
| Original Score: 2/5
