Eventually, though, the big metal things start talking and possessing names like Optimus Prime, Ratchet, and Bumblebee. This is the point that separates the men from the boy-geeks, and I just couldn't make that leap.
So, here's a surprise. The summer's first blockbuster action film worthy of its hype has nothing to do with pirates, Spider-Man or the Fantastic Four. Instead, it comes down to Michael Bay's "Transformers."