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Transylmania (2009)

tomatometer

0

Average Rating: 1.8/10
Critic Reviews: 10
Fresh: 0 | Rotten: 10

No consensus yet.

audience

21

liked it
Average Rating: 2.2/5
User Ratings: 2,308

My Rating

Movie Info

A group of college students embarks on a wild, sexy and outrageous semester abroad at Razvan University. Located deep in the heart of the "cursed land" of Transylvania in a centuries-old castle, Razvan isn't your typical institution of higher learning. The black leather-clad professors, three-foot-tall dean, instruction in crucifix-wielding, and topless vampiresses lurking in dark corners are just the start. It seems Castle Razvan was the property of the feared Vampire King Radu in the Dark Ages

R,

Comedy

Patrick Casey, Worm Miller

Apr 27, 2010

Full Circle Releasing - Official Site External Icon

Watch It Now

Cast

Latest News on Transylmania

June 26, 2012:
Lawsuits Filed Over "One of the Greatest Box Office Flops of All Time"
The story of the increasingly strange saga of "Transylmania."
December 3, 2009:
Critics Consensus: Everybody's Fine Is Just OK
This week at the movies, we've got a fractured family (Everybody's Fine, starring Robert De Niro and...

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All Critics (20) | Top Critics (10) | Fresh (0) | Rotten (19) | DVD (3)

David and Scott Hillenbrand's stoner horror-comedy predictably provides more groans than laughs. The filmmakers had better pray someone in the theater is holding, if you know what we mean.

December 9, 2009 Full Review Source: Time Out New York
Time Out New York
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Woefully dull-witted.

December 7, 2009 Full Review Source: Boston Globe
Boston Globe
Top Critic IconTop Critic

With stronger actors and real writers, this might've been a vintage comedy you could sink your...nope, not going there.

December 7, 2009 Full Review Source: L.A. Weekly
L.A. Weekly
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Energetic but uninspired mix of teen comedy and supernatural silliness.

December 7, 2009 Full Review Source: Variety
Variety
Top Critic IconTop Critic

If your idea of a good time is laughing with repulsion at a humpbacked Romanian nympho with a torture-loving midget dad, or tittering every time a bong appears, a darkened theater awaits you.

December 7, 2009 Full Review Source: Los Angeles Times
Los Angeles Times
Top Critic IconTop Critic

Transylmania is such a colossal comedic misfire that it makes the execrable Scary Movie films look like masterworks of Preston Sturges-esque genius by comparison.

December 7, 2009 Full Review Source: AV Club
AV Club
Top Critic IconTop Critic

It's really bad, but at least it's not Friedberg and Seltzer levels of bad.

October 9, 2012 Full Review Source: Cinema Crazed
Cinema Crazed

This is dinosaur stuff. A rubber chicken and a squirting flower would've really capped things off.

February 10, 2012 Full Review Source: Cinematical
Cinematical

Fart jokes ensue.

April 29, 2010 Full Review Source: Horror.com
Horror.com

'Transylmania' LOOKS like a move. It's on film, after all, and it has a script and actors. But there the resemblance to any real movie ends. This tasteless mess should have been shuttled straight to DVD.

December 12, 2009 Full Review | Comments (3)
Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)

It has no artistic or social value, and it contains not one genuine laugh.

December 5, 2009 Full Review Source: Combustible Celluloid | Comments (2)
Combustible Celluloid

Transylmania's characters are intensely irritating and its comedy is so obvious that you'll see the film's limp attempts at jokes coming a mile away.

December 5, 2009 Full Review Source: CinemaBlend.com | Comment (1)
CinemaBlend.com

Spoofs horror cliches rather than stringing together random, witless pop-culture gags like the Scary Movie franchise .... [but is] vulgar, juvenile, gross and not particularly funny.

December 5, 2009 Full Review Source: Horror Hacker
Horror Hacker

Parental Content Review

December 4, 2009 Full Review Source: Screen It!
Screen It!

I surveyed the crowd at the screening I attended, feeling the chill in the air as seven strangers sat in stone-cold silence -- not a single laugh from anyone. The eighth moviegoer? Fast asleep five minutes in. I've never envied a person more.

December 4, 2009 Full Review Source: BrianOrndorf.com
BrianOrndorf.com

Audience Reviews for Transylmania

Okay, I know what you're thinking. It's hard to get over how incredibly stupid this movie looks. The thing about this movie is that it's really skillfully made. It's a rather seamlessly crafted farce that totally nails all its laughs. It's just full of tits and vampires in a very schlocky way. The premise of this film is a little bit weak, but I find it kind of funny that it's not the "vampire trying to resurrect his evil loved one" or even the "mad scientist tries to perform head transplant" that I found far-fetched, it was the fact that an idiot manages to convince all his buddies to attend a university in Romania just so he can finally meet his internet sweetheart that I found a little hard to swallow. The elements of the ridiculous in this film are knowingly such, and the writers make them work to thier advantage. In fact, this film's internal logic is really surprisingly strong, and it never breaks any of its rules. I was very impressed and amused by this movie. It's got a really intricate story structure that totally works.
February 2, 2011
MidnightMadwoman

Super Reviewer

CAST: Patrick Cavanaugh, James DeBello, Tony Denman, Paul H. Kim, Jennifer Lyons, Oren Skoog, David Steinberg, Musetta Vander, Irena A. Hoffman, Natalie Garza, Nicole Garza

DIRECTED BY: David Hillenbrand

SUMMARY: Deep in the heart of Transylvania lies Razvan University, where a group of visiting students is about to get the shock of a lifetime. When not being stalked by vampires and succubi, they're evading Razvan's other resident crazies. Seductive teachers, willing students and a hunchback are all included in this year's curriculum.

MY THOUGHTS: "I knew it was going to be stupid, I knew there would be bad acting, I even knew it probably would be a waste of a rental(and it was). BUT, I thought at least it would probably be funny. Unfortunately I was right about everything, but the funny part. It was such a boring movie. I laughed maybe once, and that was due to Paul H. Kim. He was the only one who was even a bit funny to me. So I will recommend this one, but I warn you it really isn't worth the rental. Well unless these are your types of movies.."
July 13, 2010
LWOODS04
♥˩ƳИИ ƜѲѲƉƧ♥

Super Reviewer

it's a beach party movie...only in transylvania...and in 2009, 40 years later and no better at all!
December 15, 2009
ApeneckFletcher

Super Reviewer

    1. Lia: You guy's we need to force him to put me back together guys, seriously.
    2. Wang: Actually, I've been looking through focus notes and shit, and I'm fairly sorta confident that I can reattach your head to this frankenbody.
    3. Danni: You're gonna put her body on that thing?
    4. Pete: Dude, do you think you can do that?
    5. Wang: I was pre-med before I changed to music appreciation, and after all the years of playing video games, these hands have been high tuned.
    – Submitted by Joseph B (2 years ago)
View all quotes (1)

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