Mr. Showbiz

Rating Title | Year Quote Author
1 47%

The Perfect Storm (2000)

"Can't match its visual poetry with compelling drama."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

2 33%

The 13th Warrior (1999)

"The 13th Warrior indulges in enough grubby histrionics and costume-adventure clichés to give you fifth-grade flashbacks."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

3 30%

The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc (1999)

"Marvelously shot."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

4 29%

The Thirteenth Floor (1999)

"Wildly uneven!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

5 43%

The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle (2000)

"Much of the humor is surprisingly sophisticated."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

6 46%

Runaway Bride (1999)

"Breezily funny and entertaining!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

7 68%

Timecode (Time Code) (2000)

"Some movies become milestones on the basis of quality, others, for being where they are when they are. Mike Figgis' Time Code is assured of qualifying in the second category."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Richard T. Jameson

8 16%

The Art of War (2000)

"Two hours' worth of painful stupidity, overt racism, and mind-battering noise and movement."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Lawrence Terenzi

9 62%

Arlington Road (1999)

"A crisp, suspenseful thriller!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

10 10%

The Watcher (2000)

"The Watcher will have written itself in your head by your third handful of popcorn."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

11 61%

American Pie (1999)

"Most of American Pie just isn't smart or clever enough."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Jeffrey Wells

12 23%

Patch Adams (1998)

"By the end of it, you may feel like tripping a stranger just to shake off the sticky-sweet residue."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Eleonore Snow

13 14%

Red Planet (2000)

"A programmatic wash, suitable for the bottom half of a double bill, perhaps, if only we had such things anymore."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

14 36%

In Too Deep (1999)

"A gritty, well-acted urban drama with lots of humanity."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

15 69%

Keeping the Faith (2000)

"Norton's first film is crisp, confident, and considerably more entertaining than it has any right to be."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

16 32%

Superstar (1999)

"Superstar is considerably less fun than a marathon of Star Search episodes."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

17 90%

October Sky (1999)

"October Sky will go straight to the heart of any man who recalls looking up at the night sky as a boy and getting stars in his eyes."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

18 56%

Poor White Trash (2000)

"I'd rather go on an all-Crisco diet than sit through Poor White Trash again."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

19 48%

The Road to El Dorado (2000)

"[Katzenberg] has plainly and wholly succumbed to the familiarity of his former employer's trademark formula."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

20 76%

Mansfield Park (1999)

"Despite its brazen politics, Mansfield Park never goes giddily amok as promised."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

21 84%

Nurse Betty (2000)

"[The actors'] nimble comic timing is hampered by truly ugly, amateurish production work."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

22 53%

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

"You've got a stinker that deserves to be locked away in the yuletide bomb shelter along with Scrooged and Santa Claus: The Movie."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

23 86%

The Original Kings of Comedy (2000)

"All these men ... have their mirthful moments."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

24 36%

Rules of Engagement (2000)

"Nothing in this movie makes much sense."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Richard T. Jameson

25 25%

Digimon - The Movie (2000)

"Not that I'm encouraging you to see the movie, you understand -- especially not when you could, for example, alternatively spend the evening tweezing your eyebrows with chopsticks."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

26 74%

The Big Kahuna (2000)

"A ponderous stage adaptation that expends only the mildest effort to overcome its staginess."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

27 68%

Dancer in the Dark (2000)

"It demands to be seen, and though you might detest it, at least you'll exit the theater with the bruised sense of having seen something memorable."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

28 33%

Romeo Must Die (2000)

"Romeo Must Die gets bogged down by looong stretches of substandard, preachy urban violence melodrama."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

29 71%

Enemy of the State (1998)

"Another hackneyed, high-concept action flick!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

30 28%

The Bone Collector (1999)

"The Bone Collector never comes close to the moral chill of Seven or even the step-by-step fascination generated by any number of HBO true-crime shows."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

31 43%

Center Stage (2000)

"Subpar Dawson's Creek in Danskins."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

32 40%

Snow Falling on Cedars (1999)

"Hicks determinedly neglects almost every other narrative element for the sake of atmosphere, a decision that robs the film of almost everything that made Guterson's story compelling."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Lawrence Terenzi

33 49%

Bedazzled (2000)

"A positively divine comedy."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Cody Clark

34 14%

Pokemon the First Movie - Mewtwo vs. Mew (1999)

"70 minutes of irritation."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Lawrence Terenzi

35 67%

A Midsummer Night's Dream (1999)

"Overheated, tedious!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

36 27%

Instinct (1999)

"Hands-down worst movies of the season!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Richard T. Jameson

37 55%

Blade (1998)

"Blade is one of those all-style, no-substance goth-mix adaptations that looks like The Crow, sounds like Spawn, and feels like Dark City."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Naomi Ryerson

38 5%

Universal Soldier - The Return (1999)

"An endless barrage of action-packed fights sure to please all of Van Damme's diehard fans!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

39 62%

The Tigger Movie (2000)

"A pale imitation of the original Winnie the Pooh Disney shorts of the '60s."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

40 87%

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

"It might be the scariest movie ever made!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

41 71%

Bringing Out the Dead (1999)

"Bringing Out the Dead is stunning to look at; unfortunately, it's not terribly satisfying to watch."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Richard T. Jameson

42 12%

Get Carter (2000)

"David McKenna's script is a frayed string and a contextual nightmare, peppered with puzzling references to the first film in a lame attempt at homage."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Lawrence Terenzi

43 55%

Hamlet (2000)

"Almereyda never plays up the gimmickry at the expense of the performances."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

44 80%

The Green Mile (1999)

"A vivid, emotional story."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

45 17%

The Haunting (1999)

"Shockingly lethargic!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

46 64%

Music of the Heart (1999)

"Music is a calculated but effective film."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

47 40%

Varsity Blues (1999)

"Already a prime candidate for 1999's worst!"

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

48 34%

Woman on Top (2000)

"Hopefully, somebody soon -- maybe Billy Bob Thornton with the upcoming All the Pretty Horses -- will give this girl a real movie."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

49 93%

The Limey (1999)

"Soderbergh might just be the best director of conversations in Hollywood."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Michael Atkinson

50 87%

Calle 54 (2001)

"A must-see for avid fans and a welcome primer for nascent hip-shakers everywhere."

Posted Jan 1, 2000

Kevin Maynard

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