Kinnopio's Movie Reviews
Ghost Rock (2004)
The Ring Two (2005)
Be Cool (2005)
The Jacket (2005)
Man of the House (2005)
Pooh's Heffalump Movie (2005)
Because of Winn-Dixie (2005)
"It feels like a repackaged version of The Matrix, only less costly and more literal."
The Wedding Date (2005)
"You may find yourself wishing for something more consequential; just because romantic comedies are supposed to be sweet doesn't mean they have to dissolve like sugar, too."
Hide and Seek (2005)
Alone in the Dark (2005)
"Less a coherent motion picture than a series of fight scenes and shootouts that feature abysmally unconvincing special effects."
Are We There Yet? (2005)
The Woodsman (2004)
Fat Albert (2004)
In Good Company (2004)
Beyond the Sea (2004)
Stage Beauty (2004)
Flight of the Phoenix (2004)
Touching the Void (2004)
Before Sunset (2004)
Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)
"A familiar, unremarkable shoot-em-up: low on tension, suspense, and plot, and high on bullets, clichés, and one-liners."
"Badass action heroine movies are like trendy new cell phone accessories: Suddenly every girl in Hollywood has to have one."
Racing Stripes (2005)
"One-dimensional storytelling may be necessary for very young viewers, but kids, on the whole, are smarter than Racing Stripes gives them credit for being."
A Very Long Engagement (2004)
"The French version of Cold Mountain, a romance of epic proportions that thinks it's a war picture."
White Noise (2005)
"A scary, empty thriller ... thick with middle-age fantasy but woefully thin on plot."
Coach Carter (2005)
"A strong performance by Samuel L. Jackson enables the film to transcend the mold exploited by other teen sports dramas."
Meet the Fockers (2004)
"Not nearly as funny as Meet the Parents, and saved only from disaster by Dustin Hoffman and Barbara Streisand."
"Scary in the familiar, intermittent way of a run-of-the-mill thriller."
A Love Song for Bobby Long (2004)
"It deviates from the teen genre enough to suggest that Scarlett Johnasson is more concerned with the lateral boundaries of her range than the vertical ones."
"Not as good as Wes Anderson's two best movies, The Royal Tenenbaums and Rushmore, but it still offers a broad sample of his distinct style."
The Aviator (2004)
"If you want to understand why everyone has such high regard for Martin Scorsese, one good place to start would be with The Aviator."
Million Dollar Baby (2004)
"I do not know whether Clint Eastwood has read any Steinbeck, but you would certainly think it from the way that he has filmed Million Dollar Baby."
The Phantom of the Opera (2005)
"Bland and unremarkable."
"A charm of fiction and imagination."
"A greasy, pugnacious, and very watchable ensemble movie."
"Spanglish is a real button-pusher, one of those comedies that operates in narrative shorthand."
Hotel Rwanda (2004)
"Hotel Rwanda is not perfect, but it compels us to be."
Ocean's Twelve (2004)
"Soderbergh has overcomplicated what made Ocean's Eleven worthwhile: the breezy fun of watching a bunch of A-list stars goofing off."
Blade: Trinity (2004)
"So far from the original Blade, that were it not for Wesley Snipes, you would probably think that it was a spin-off."
"Riveting for the way it effortlessly but relentlessly dials up the tension with the things the characters say."
The Machinist (2004)
Christmas With the Kranks (2004)
"As soggy and unhealthy as a half-baked Christmas cookie."
"A straightforward accounting of a man's life, neatly sorted out in by-the-book Hollywood fashion."