Double Date is the 3rd episode of the third season of New Girl, the 52nd episode overall.
Schmidt's relationship house of cards comes tumbling down during a double date.
Thinking Schmidt has chosen to be with Cece, Jess and Nick invite him to go on a double date with them. Nick is caught between loyalty to his friend and loyalty to his girlfriend when he finds out a shocking secret. Meanwhile, Winston promises to get the foursome a table at an ultra-exclusive restaurant that doesn't take reservations.
Schmidt calls Elizabeth to see what they are going to do later tonight. Elizabeth responds that they will be watching "Dexter" and eating pie. Schmidt hangs up just as Cece walks out of his bedroom. At the same time, Nick and Jess walk out and propose that they all (Nick, Jess, Cece, and Schmidt) go on a double date at the same night Schmidt plans to be with Elizabeth. Schmidt hides his freaking out by not blinking and singing.
Winston walks in about to feed Ferguson the cat and guesses that the gang were talking about going on a double date. Winston asks if he can come along if he makes a reservation at a restaurant called Picca. The gang all agree.
Back in Jess' room, Nick and Jess are in bed together and Jess shows Nick an injury she sustained in the 7th grade by pumping her first at a Weird Al show. Cece walks in needing to talk to Jess. Nick freaks out since he's completely naked under Jess' sheets. Cece suspects Schmidt is on drugs based on the way he reacted when Jess proposed a double date. Nick and Jess don't believe Schmidt is on drugs. Jess asks Nick to talk to Schmidt about the situation. Nick doesn't want to saying he was going to stay out of their business. Jess tells him that she would give him a "bedroom treat" if he talks to him. Nick agrees then gets out of bed exposing himself to Cece.
At the restaurant Picca, Winston walks in to make a reservation. The restaurant hostess tells Winston that there is an opening at 8 p.m. in seven weeks. Winston attempts to bribe the hostess for a table, so the hostess suggest that Winston try his luck at the "community table".
At the loft, Nick talks to Schmidt. Schmidt pulls Nick into his bedroom and shuts the door. Nick doesn't know what Schmidt is doing, and Schmidt tells Nick that he's been dating both Cece and Elizabeth. Nick is confused at first, and after Schmidt explains how he never broke up with them, Nick tells Schmidt that he has to choose or it will end badly for all of them. Schmidt begs Nick not to tell anyone, especially Jess.
Later, Winston tries calling the restaurant to make a reservation by pretending to be a book author. Nick practices "lying" to Jess in front of his mirror. Nick finds himself incapable of lying to Jess since he's in a new relationship with her. Jess enters the loft calling out for Nick. She enters his room to find him wearing a motorcycle helmet. Jess is turned on and when she attempts to lift the visor on the helmet, Nick turns his head and shakes his head. Jess asks if they're finally going to have "no kiss sex". Nick nods his head and Jess shuts the door.
Winston arrives at community table at Picca and grosses people out by eating their food waiting for them to leave so he can call "dibs" on the spot.
After the two have sex, Jess asks if Nick had the chance to talk to Schmidt. Nick shuts his visor to avoid the conversation, but Jess pulls it back up knowing Nick cannot keep a secret.
Jess storms out of his room yelling at Schmidt for cheating on her best friend. She warns Schmidt to tell Cece everything or else she will. Meanwhile, Nick dances in order to make the situation less awkward. When Cece walks into the loft ready for the double date, Schmidt braces himself to tell Cece everything. Instead, he storms off with her throwing her cell phone away and drive off. Jess and Nick chase after them.
At Picca, Winston continues to scare people away from the community table and calling Jess to see if they were coming.
Schmidt drives at an uncontrollable speed, driving past stop signs. Cece asks Schmidt what's going on, and Schmidt yells out "Nick is cheating on Jess." Cece is shocked as Schmidt cries out how Nick "was the best of them." Nick and Jess drive slowly to the restaurant. Nick says he didn't want to get involved in Schmidts affair because he's his best friend and the fact that Schmidt is "very scary." Jess doesnt' believe Schmidt is scary and that Nick is just afraid. Nick doesn't like that statement and says "woudl a scared person put his finger down the cigarette lighter?" Jess tells him not to do that, and when Nick pulls his hand back, Jess puts her finger down the cigarette lighter and burns herself. Jess cries in pain and Nick puts his finger down the cigarette lighter so the two of them can "share their pain."
Cece and Schmidt arrive at the restaurant. Cece storms into the restaurant to "junk punch" Nick for cheating on Jess. Schmidt stays behind in his car freaking out. Shortly afterwards, Nick and Jess arrive at the restaurant. Nick admits that because Schmidt is his best friend, and Cece is Jess' best friend he didn't want to get involved. Jess says that when someone she "loves" gets hurt, she does get involved, and then enters the restaurant. Noticing that Schmidt is parked in front of him, Nick enters his car and says that Schmidt "needs to fix this," and enters the restaurant.
Nick approaches Jess and Cece (just as they are about to talk) and Cece punches Nick in the groin, twice. Schmidt walks in and tells Cece to stop. He the tells her the truth that he's been cheating on her with Elizabeth. Cece is heart broken and begins to cry. Schmidt, also crying, tells Cece that he never wanted to hurt anyone.
He confesses that since he got thin and a bunch of girls like him now, he got lost in the mayhem and didn't know what to do. "I don't know who you are." Cece says and walks away.
Back at the loft, Jess constantly checks her phone to see if Cece called or texted her. She feels bad that she's not there for Cece and wants to be. Nick tells Jess that when she wants her, she'll call. Worried about the situation that they're now in, Nick assures Jess that there is nothing he knows now more than ever that he wants to be with her. Nick and Jess kiss.
They hear Elizabeth yelling in the other room, and run out to check whats going on. Elizabeth is seen shoving a pie in Schmidt's face (who received the news from Cece since she had Elizabeths numbers.) After Elizabeth leaves, Schmidt tells Nick and Jess that he blames the two of them of his, Cece's and Elizabeths heartbreak (claiming that he wasn't going to hurt either of them.) He then vows vengeance by threatening (should it take the rest of his life) he was going to break the two of them up. Using his dead, unblinking eyes, Jess sees how Schmidt can be very scary. Taking his threat seriously, Jess and Nick begin to share some secrets of theirs that Schmidt could use to break them up.
Jess and Nick secrets:
- Jess is a Democrat and Nick never voted.
- Jess has been banned for life from Lake Ontario (reason not explained)
- Jess has a fear of pears and pear shaped people.
- Nick is not convinced he knows how to read and just memorized a bunch of words.
- A doctor says Jess could grow another 18".
- Nick believes the moon landing is fake.
- Jess wants to get a gun.
- Nick is sexually attracted to ladybugs.
- Jess is weirdly good at volleyball.
- Both Nick and Jess believe horses are from outer space.