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Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

Director
Colin & Greg Strause

Writer
Shane Salerno

Cast
Steven Pasquale, Reiko Aylesworth and John Ortiz
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Fox really dropped the ball on the first AVP. Sure, I wasn't expecting much but I was atleast expecting to have some fun with it... and I didn't. They pretty much crapped on both of the series and had so many inconsistencies it boggled my mind and the minds of the Alien/Predators fans from around the world. The Predators looked like a the stiff-ass Batman costume from '89, facehuggers impregnated their victims and chestbursters were born within minutes, one single Alien killing multiple Predators and it was rated PG-13! How could you make a film about one alien life-form that skins people and hangs them from trees and another that bursts out of peoples chest PG-13... it makes me wonder if they even researched the source material.

I caught the redband trailer a couple of months ago and it looked like a huge leap from the first film. More "costumed" Aliens, Predators looked like they should and gore... glorious, glorious gore. Could this be the time they get it right? Right as in I may actually have fun watching it?!

If you've seen the first film, a Predator "gives birth" to a "Predalien" (yep, that's what it's called.) The Predalien attacks everyone in the ship and crash lands in the woods of a nearby small town in Colorado. Meanwhile, a Predator is sent to clean up the mess.

The film started out well enough if not a bit rushed (not sure why since the runtime is only 86 minutes.) We get some nice scenes of acid melting a guys arm off and some little kid getting facehugged. Now I'm thinking "this is leaps and bounds better than AVP" but now we jump to scenes of a Rescue Me guy who break into places and steals stuff (?) returning to town with his sheriff friend who obviously loves his Soul Glo - "Feelin' oh-so silky smooth!" We learn about his brother who delivers pizzas and likes some really easy girl and breaks up with her asshole boyfriend and some 3rd rate Ripley wanna-be receiving an emotional reception with her husband and her 2nd rate Newt daughter. Wow... exciting.

If these scenes weren't intercut with scenes of Aliens and Predators I would've thought I was watching an entirely different film. Why am I spending so much time with these characters if they do the most cliched things, their relationships never pay off and they are still two-dimensional. I don't care for these people... actually I fucking despise them. If this is supposed to be some sort of homage to Aliens they're kidding themselves. Most of the characters in Aliens are extremely likeable despite their flaws, the people I'm watching are just annoying me with their terrible acting and awful dialogue.

There is some good though. As I stated before the Aliens and Predator look like their counterparts from their original films and the effects are pretty good (they should be since the Strause brothers are mostly effects artists.) It's good seeing the Predalien although it looks a little cheesy and it being able to produce it's own eggs in it's victims is ridiculous. A lot of the deaths scenes are really well done but if you've seen the redband trailer you've seen them all. It also includes little stuff for the fans of the originals films such as the motion radar beeping from Aliens at the begining, the infamous "Get to tha Choppa!" quote from Predator and an appearance from Ms. Yutani.

Overall a major disappointment despite the fact that the film had balls. It's worth a look for fans of both series on DVD but it's a rather disappointing theater experience. I just hope that the next AVP film will get the hell out of present day Earth and include the Colonial Marines. Bring the Colonial Marines back now! Hell, I'd be satisfied with a movie with just Aliens and Predators with no dialogue at all over this.

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The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada (2005)

Director: Tommy Lee Jones

Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Barry Pepper, Dwight Yoakam and Julio Cesar Cedillo

I return to write a little review and bring back my shitty titles. I've got a brand spankin' new internet provider and have a bit of writers block so why not start catching up on my reviews?!

Now I'm a sucker for westerns and what's not to love about them? The protagonists are bad-asses, the setting is gorgeous yet run-down and depressing, and the atmosphere feels as harsh as the actions of the characters. The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly is my #2 favorite movie of all time and many more make my top 50 list. I already preordered The Proposition with out even fucking watching it... I usually don't do that.

TTBoME starts out promising... they shoot a mexican. What's not promising about that?! (I'm just kidding, my wifes mexican so I can stuff like that... as long as she doesn't know.) The film plays in a non-linear format, the first scene is the discovery of Mel's corpse and thereafter for the first half of the film it's showcases the events before and after they find his body. We see the bond that Pete (Jones) and Mel) shared and the shooting that doesn't look accidental... but perhaps was. The second half of the film is Pete getting his own form of justice after Mel's case is poorly handled. He finds out that Mike (Pepper) a border patrol officer shot Mel. Pete kidnaps Mikes and forces his to travel with him and Mel's corpses across the border to Mexico and bury his friend properly.

This is one of the best films I've seen in recent memory. Enough drama, heart, emotion and EVEN comedy (it's even listed as a 'dark comedy') to satisfy any film craving I have. It may take a democratic view of the illegal immigrant issue yet it doesn't shove it in your face as that it's only a side plot. The characters a very well rounded even though you really want to hate a character you just can't, they have too many redeeming qualities as all human beings do. The lighting and cinemaphotography is astounding, some scenes really caught my eye such as Mike running away from Pete in the desert and runs through a patch of sunflowers.

I chose this out of many films I've watch recently because it's not too well known and I want to let people know it's out there and they should give it a chance. This film is truely great and should not be missed!

9.0/10

Over The Hedge (2006)

Director: Tim Johnson and Karey Kirkpatrick

Cast: Bruce Willis, Garry Shandling, Steve Carell, and Thomas Haden Church

There are a lot of damn 'CGI animals go on an adventure' movie lately. A lot of them I usually pass on because of mediocre/ba reviews. Even kids didn't like Madagascar and they're the easiest audience to please! I saw that Over The Hedge (surprisingly) had pretty good reviews so I decided to see it.

It's about a racoon (Willis) who pisses a bear off by attemping to steal and destroying his hibernation food. He goes out to get everything the bear lost and ends up using some very gullable and innocent forest animals including a turtle (Shandling) a skunk (Wanda Sykes) and a squirrel (Carell) who have awaken to find out most of the forest has been turned into a suburb. After stealing food and causing a rukus one resident decides to call an exterminator (Church) to rid the town of the animals.

This was quite an enjoyable movie although aside from Church and Carrell it really wasn't THAT funny. Garry Shandling was pretty good since I haven't seen anything he's done in a while but I kept picturing Willis as the racoon because he's too recognizable. That's why I feel animated films should showcase lesser-know actors such as Craig T. Nelson in The Incredibles rather than actors that are in a blockbusters every year.

Overall it's one of the better animated movies to come out although not as laugh-out-loud funny as say the Shrek series and Toy Story.

7.5/10

Munich (2005)

Director: Steven Spielberg

Cast: Eric Bana, Daniel Craig, Ciarán Hinds, and Geoffery Rush

Steven Spielberg seems to be one of the hardest working directors today. Every other year he seems to be coming out with solid films. Last year it was War of the Worlds and Munich. One was a summer sci-fi popcorn flick and the other is a drama based on true and tragic events. Munich is among his best films.

In 1972 11 Israeli athletes were killed by a group of Black September terrorists. In retaliation a group of men are hired (but "don't exist") to assassinate 11 of the men who were responsible for the massacre. They drink and celebrate after their first successfuly kill but afterward they all become weary of what they are doing.

The film was much more graphic than I expected. Head shots that look like their straight out of a Romero film and bombs that turn the victim into a pile of blood and guts. This graphic imagery makes for an even deeper impact of what they are doing.

This film is a great character study. The group of assassins are no more than ordinary people that have varying views of what they are and should be doing. Bana's Avner would rather stay at home with his wife and newborn daughter but is falling into a state of madness and paranoia from the killing frenzy. Their is no satisfaction in the successful killings which is very important to the film.

The assassinations are not easily done either. Their are innocent bystanders that they must avoid which create some very tense scenes. Bana is great as usual. Craig is great and makes me look forward to his James Bond even more and Hines is very memorable as a straight-laced cleaner who is as great as he is as Julius Ceaser on HBO's Rome.

One of Spielbergs best since most of his films for the last few years have been pretty bland for me.

9.0/10

Jarhead (2005)

Director: Sam Mendes

Cast: Jake Gyllenhaal, Jamie Fox, Peter Sarsgaard, and Chris Cooper

Last year I was really looking forward to seeing Jarhead. I've loved Mendes' films such as American Beauty and Road to Perdition. I was actually surprised with the amount of mixed reviews it received, but I can gladly add Jarhead on my list of great films.

The film takes place before and during the Gulf War. A war that lasted only 4 days. This is not a traditional war film since the marines sit around being bored for over 120 days. Before they ship out they watch films such as Apocalypse Now and look forward to someday having that action play out for them in real-life.

What plays out is depressing and complete meloncholy. They cleaning out shitters, write letters and sit around wondering what their girlfriends and wives REALLY are doing back home. Killing for them is almost like an artform but never have the oppurtunity to. One of the best scenes is of having the perfect shot and not getting permission to fire... the reaction is an explosion of emotions that have been built up for months of anticipation.

"Vietnam music... can't we get our own music?"

Another subject touched upon seems to be that the last generations of Americans have no identity. We're just rehash's of past generations searching for a purpose.

The performances are top-notch. Gyllenhaal is great but Fox and Sarsgaard own this film. Every scene their in is exceptional and it's a shame neither were nominated.

9.0/10