[Fabfunk Triumphant!]

Since we’re entering 2005, here are 25 movies coming out this year that I think will kick a</>ss...

THE FOUNTAIN- Darren Aronofsky has been trying to get this off the ground for years. Considering he’s only directed two films (and written BELOW), I imagine this is his dream project. What I know of it is that it involves a doctor who thinks he’s God (Hugh Jackman), an Incan explorer (Hugh Jackman) and a futuristic traveler shooting through space on a mission to meet God (Hugh Jackman- the traveler, not God, although who knows). Aronofsky was going to shoot this on an $80 million budget last year but Brad Pitt dropped out because he didn’t at all get the script re-write, and $20 million in preproduction was lost. Now Aronofsky was so desperate to get this off the ground that he halved the budget, and WB is funding this $40 million top secret project as you read. Aside from my massive Jackman mancrush, Aronofsky’s last two films were non-genre films made by someone who is obviously a genre filmmaker.

THE GOOD SHEPHERD- Matt Damon is playing a young DeNiro in this, one of those young-old biopics about one of the founders of the CIA. This script has been circulating for awhile now, and Leo DiCaprio was supposed to play young DeNiro instead. I can’t see the resemblance either way, but DeNiro is directing, and movies never really probe what the CIA really does, so I’ll probably see this.

THE NEW WORLD- A Terence Malick film. Colin Farrell plays John Smith. Christian Bale is in this too, a wacky culture clash comedy about Native Americans and English explorers crossing paths. And by wacky comedy I mean there will be lots of slow motion shots of sunsets, heady narration and complaintive music. Some people hate this stuff. I liked THE THIN RED LINE and BADLANDS, so I love it.



PALINDROMES- Todd Solondz is Alexander Payne’s pissed off younger brother. At least that’s what it seems. This is a movie about a girl played by a number of different actresses throughout pivotal moments of her life. I’m sure there’s a reason for it, but the fact is Solondz makes black comedies that traffic in nastiness, the flip side of a lightweight indie like fellow New Jerseyan Zach Braff’s toothless GARDEN STATE. The guy made HAPPINESS; that’s a lifetime of goodwill right there.

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN- Swords! Chainmail! Horses! Orlando Bloom! Yep, sounds like a period epic to me. Fortunately, this is from Ridley Scott, who knows a little something about kickass filmmaking. Plus Brendan Gleeson, who’s as big as a bear and in person nearly as huggable, without the head-devouring potential.