Jay Baruchel

Hiccup:	Who knows, maybe we'll finally track down another night fury... Won't that be something.
Hiccup:	Who knows, maybe we'll finally track down another night fury. Won't that be something.

---

Hiccup:	I wish I could be that sure.
Stoick:	Listen, I know what it's like to miss someone you love this time of year. but what do we do when they can't be here for the holiday? we celebrate them. and I imagine that's exactly what Toothless would want you to do.

Hiccup:	A chief protects his own! We're going back!
Tuffnut:	Uhhh, with what?
Ruffnut:	Uhhh, he took all the dragons.
Hiccup:	Not all of them.

---

Hiccup:

Shut it off bud.

---

Hiccup:

Toothless! You're pounding big baby boo.

---

Astrid:	That's your mother?!
Hiccup:	Now you know where I get my dramatic flair!

---

Astrid:	Where've you been?
Hiccup:	Oh, you know, catching up with Mom.

---

Hiccup:	Welcome aboard, dragon rider!
Eret Son of Eret:	Thanks... I think.

---

Gobber:	Some may suggest this was poorly conceived.
Hiccup:	Then it's a good thing that I never listen!

---

Hiccup:

This is Berk. It's twelve days north of Hopeless and a few degrees south of Freezing to Death. It's located solidly on the Meridian of Misery. My village. In a word, sturdy. It's been here for seven generations, but every single building is new. We've got hunting, fishing, and a charming view of the sunsets. The only problems are the pests. Most places have mice or mosquitoes. We have... dragons.

---

Hiccup:

They're babies! They don't listen!

---

Hiccup:	Should I know you?
Valka:	No, you were just a babe. But a mother never forgets.

---

Hiccup:

So... What should we name it? Itchy Armpit it is.

---

Danger Barch:

Oh, look, I'm Shawrelle! I'm humpin' the canvas!

---

Danger Barch:

Anyone can lose one fight.

---

Tom Pope:

I wouldn't buy that for a dollar.

---

Hiccup:

This is Berk. Life here is Amazing. Dragons used to be a bit of a problem, but now they've all moved in! And with Vikings on the backs of dragons, the world just got a whole lot bigger.

---

Jay Baruchel:

We just somehow have to prove our worthiness.

---

Danny McBride:	His face looks like the police sketch of a fucking rapist.
Jay Baruchel:	What the fuck does that mean?

---

Hiccup:	What do ya think bud, you wanna gives this another shot
Hiccup:	What do ya think bud, you wanna gives this another shot.
Hiccup:	This is amazing
Hiccup:	This is amazing.

---

Doug Glatt:	Pat: 69! Take the number 69 it's hilarious
Doug Glatt:	69! Take the number 69. It's hilarious
Doug Glatt:	69! Take the number 69. It's hilarious.
Pat:	69! Take the number 69. It's hilarious.

---

Danny McBride:	If anyone's going to rape anybody, it's Jay.
Jay Baruchel:	What the fuck?
Jonah Hill:	Guys! Jay couldn't rape anyone! Jay couldn't rape a fly!

---

Jay Baruchel:	The power of Christ compels you!
Jonah Hill:	Does it Jay?
Jonah Hill:	Does it jay?
Jay Baruchel:	THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELLS YOU!
Jonah Hill:	Does it Jay? Do I look compelled Jay? Let me tell you, its not very compelling!
Seth Rogen:	What are you just quoting the Exorcist
Jay Baruchel:	Yes dude it was a fucking training manual! I'm pretty sure they did their fucking research!
Jay Baruchel:	Yes dude, it was a fucking training manual! I'm pretty sure they did their fucking research!

---

Jay Baruchel:	Can we please discuss the elephant in the room? Man Craig is right here...yeh that's racist!
Jay Baruchel:	Can we please discuss the elephant in the room? Man Craig is right here. Yeah, that's racist!

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for nothing you useless reptile.

---

Jay Baruchel:	Can we please go to fucking Carl's Jr.?
Seth Rogen:	Uh...I'm on a cleanse.
Seth Rogen:	Uh. I'm on a cleanse.
Jay Baruchel:	So, you're not drinking, you're not smoking weed...
Jay Baruchel:	So, you're not drinking, you're not smoking weed?
Seth Rogen:	I'm on a cleanse, I'm not psychotic.

---

Kirk Lazarus:	Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude.
Kevin Sandusky:	What?
Kirk Lazarus:	You a dude that don't know what dude he is!
Tugg Speedman:	Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is..
Tugg Speedman:	Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is?

---

Jay:	I'm going to be there to rear your child.
Jason:	You hear that, Ben? Don't let him near the kid, he wants to rear your child!

---

Jay:	Man, my balls are shaved, my pubes are trimmed, I'm ready to fuckin' rock this shit!
Jonah:	What the fuck, man? If I go in there and see fuckin' pubes sprinkled on the toilet seat, I'm gonna fuckin' lose my mind! Last time I went to the bathroom, Jay, I took a shit and my shit looked like a fuckin' stuffed animal!

---

Jay:	Man, my balls are shaved, my pubes are trimmed, I'm ready to fuckin' rock this shit!

---

Jay:	Because your face looks like a vagina.

---

Hiccup:

I wouldn't kill him because he looked as frightened as I was. I looked at him, and I saw myself.

---

Hiccup:	You just gestured to all of me.
Hiccup:	But you just pointed to all of me!

---

Hiccup:	You just pointed to all of me.
Hiccup:	You just gestured to all of me.

---

Astrid:	[punches Hiccup] That's for scaring me.
Hiccup:	Wha.. is it always going to be this way? Is... [gets a full-on kiss by Astrid] I could get used to it.

---

Shiner:	Is there a reason why we're in the car instead of the office?
Eric Packer:	What makes you think we're in the car instead of the office?

---

Hiccup:	Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile
Hiccup:	Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

---

Stoick:	Turns out all we needed was a little more of this.
Hiccup:	You just gestured to all of me.

---

Stoick:	They have killed hundreds of us
Hiccup:	....We have killed thousands of them

---

Hiccup:	Thank you, for summing that up
Hiccup:	[sarcastically] Thank you for summing that up.

---

Hiccup:

Excuse me, barmaid! I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring! I ordered an extra-large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish-bone!

---

Hiccup:	Everything we know about them was wrong
Hiccup:	Everything we know about them was wrong.

---

Hiccup:

Pain... love it.

---

Gobber:	If you ever want to get out there to fight dragons, you need to stop… this.
Hiccup:	But you just pointed to all of me.

---

Pat:	I think my eyeballs just ejaculated!

---

Hiccup:

Ta-ta-dah, we're dead...

---

Leon Bronstein:

Fascist.

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

---

Pat:	I'll sign your dick Doug...

---

Hiccup:	"You just gestured to all of me!"
Hiccup:	You just gestured to all of me!

---

Hiccup:

Everything we know about them, is wrong.

---

Hiccup:	Well, whatever! I wouldn't! Three hundred years, and I'm the first Viking who wouldn't kill a dragon.
Astrid:	First to ride one, though...

---

Gobber:	Oh, nice of you to join the party! I thought you'd been carried off!
Hiccup:	Who, me? Nah, come on! I'm way too... muscular for their taste! They wouldn't know what to do with all... (flexing) this!
Hiccup:	Who, me? Nah, come on! I'm way too... muscular for their taste! They wouldn't know what to do with all... [flexing] this!
Gobber:	Well, they need toothpicks, don't they?

---

Hiccup:	You-you, sir, are playing a dangerous game! Keeping this much raw... "Viking-ness" contained! There will be consequences!
Hiccup:	You-you, sir, are playing a dangerous game! Keeping this much raw... 'Viking-ness' contained! There will be consequences!
Gobber:	I'll take my chances.

---

Hiccup:	Huh...toothless. I could have sworn you had (Toothless takes fish)....teeth.
Hiccup:	Huh...toothless. I could have sworn you had [Toothless takes fish] ...teeth.

---

Astrid:	*hits with axe*
Hiccup:	Why would you do that?
Astrid:	That's for tricking me. *Hits with axe again* That's for everything else.

---

Hiccup:

Toothless, what are you doing? We need her to LIKE us!

---

Hiccup:	He never listens.
Gobber:	Oh yeah it runs in the family.
Hiccup:	And when he does it's with this disappointed scowl like someone skimped out on the meat in his sandwich. Excuse me, barmaid, I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring. I ordered an extra large boy with meaty arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish bone.
Hiccup:	And when he does it's with this disappointed scowl like someone skimped out on the meat in his sandwich. [mocking Stoick] Excuse me, barmaid, I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring. I ordered an extra large boy with meaty arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish bone.
Gobber:	Now you're thinking about this all wrong. It's not so much what you look like, it's what's inside that he can't stand.
Hiccup:	...Thank you for summing that up.
Hiccup:	Thank you for summing that up.

---

Dave Stutler:	How do you know my name?
Balthazar Blake:	Because I can read minds!
Balthazar Blake:	It's on your backpack...

---

Stoick:	Winter is almost here and I've got an entire village to feed!
Hiccup:	Well between me and you the village could use a little less feeding.

---

Windows:	Lookin' for love in Alderaan places ?
Windows:	You ladies looking for love in Alderaan places?

---

Hiccup:	hiccup you just gesterd to all of me . goober yes stop being all of you.
Hiccup:	Hiccup you just gestured to all of me.

---

Dave Stutler:	These are old-man shoes.
Veronica:	Excuse me?
Balthazar Blake:	Excuse me?
Veronica:	I love them... a lot.
Dave Stutler:	I love them... a lot.

---

Hiccup:	Thanks for nothing you useless reptile.
Hiccup:	Thanks for nothing, you useless reptile.

---

Leon Bronstein:	Dwight, are you my Stalin?
Leon Bronstein:	Are you my Stalin, Dwight?

---

Gobber:	Nice of you to join the party, thought you'd been carried off.
Gobber:	Oh, nice of you to join the party! I thought you'd been carried off!
Hiccup:	Who, me? No, come on,l'm Way too muscular for their taste. They Wouldn't know What to do With all this.
Hiccup:	Who, me? Nah, come on! I'm way too muscular for their taste! They wouldn't know what to do with... all this! [gesturing to himself and flexing]
Gobber:	Well..!!, They need toothpicks, don't they?
Gobber:	Well, they need toothpicks, don't they?

---

Hiccup:

You caught me, I've been making outfits! Take me back to the village.

---

Stoick:	This isn't a joke, Hiccup! Why can't you follow the simplest orders?
Hiccup:	I can't stop myself! I see a dragon and I have to just... kill it, you know? It's who I am, Dad.
Hiccup:	I can't stop myself! I see a dragon and I have to just, kill it, you know? It's who I am, Dad.

---

Hiccup:	"Excuse me, barmaid! I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring! I ordered an extra-large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish-bone!"
Hiccup:	Excuse me, barmaid! I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring! I ordered an extra-large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish-bone!

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

---

Hiccup:

Not so fireproof on the inside, are you?

---

Hiccup:

Huh..toothless? I could've sworn you had...teeth.

---

Hiccup:

Okay! You got me, I've been making outfits!

---

Hiccup:

[about the dragons] Everything we know about you guys is wrong.

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for the breast-hat.

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

---

Hiccup:

Pain, love it.

---

Hiccup:

Thank you for summing that up.

---