Jordan Hoffman Movie Reviews & Previews - Rotten Tomatoes

Jordan Hoffman

Jordan Hoffman
Jordan Hoffman's reviews (from any publication) always count toward the Tomatometer because this critic is a Tomatometer-approved critic.

Movie Reviews Only

Rating T-Meter Title | Year Review
35% Blair Witch (2016) Once it becomes evident that this movie is just the 1999 version done with an electric guitar instead of an acoustic, all tension is shot.‐ Vanity Fair
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
46% The Bad Batch (2017) There's just not enough excitement or empathy in this movie to move past "yes, this is gruesome, but I get it."‐ Vanity Fair
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
73% Catfight (2017) The absurdist use of fisticuffs in Onur Tukel's extremely independent Catfight is unnerving, strangely hilarious -- and, whether you accept it or not, meaningful.‐ Vanity Fair
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
83% Denial (2016) This could be extremely rich soil for a good, smart drama in and out of the courtroom. Unfortunately, it's a bit of a dud, despite the noble efforts of the cast.‐ Vanity Fair
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
5/5 94% I Called Him Morgan (2017) Though Lee and Helen Morgan's fate is easily learned with a quick Google search, I'd rather leave it unspoken, out there in memory's snowdrift, something strange and indescribable, like this sad but still beautiful film itself.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
3/5 63% The Magnificent Seven (2016) There's a fine line between a slowburn and dull, and this Magnificent Seven frequently finds itself on the wrong side.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 12, 2016
4/5 No Score Yet Burn Your Maps (2017) We can debate if Burn Your Maps merely fetishises a different culture or holds it in true reverence, but I'd like to give it the benefit of the doubt.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 9, 2016
3/5 100% Barakah Meets Barakah (Barakah yoqabil Barakah) (2016) There's a great deal of visual sizzle, as well as sadness.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 9, 2016
3/5 81% Nocturama (2016) Too crafty to ignore, but too obnoxious to embrace.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 9, 2016
1/5 35% Max Rose (2016) Max Rose has the superficiality of a student film inexplicably bursting with famous people in it.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Sep 3, 2016
3/5 62% Klown Forever (Klovn Forever) (2016) Leave behind your notions that [Klovn Forever] won't broach any topic for a joke.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 30, 2016
4/5 87% Don't Breathe (2016) While its script could have been written on the back of an envelope, its editing and use of sound design is a triumph.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 24, 2016
3/5 60% War Dogs (2016) Emerges from a similar dark place as The Wolf of Wall Street and The Big Short, but its howl from the abyss is muted.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 23, 2016
2/5 45% Hands of Stone (2016) As subtle and welcome as a blow to the head.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 22, 2016
3/5 25% Ben-Hur (2016) In its richer moments, it may not reach the level of I, Claudius, but it's at least within a javelin's throw of HBO's Rome.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 17, 2016
2/5 97% Kubo and the Two Strings (2016) I'm not inclined to give a pass to a family film that indoctrinates an irrational belief system just because it's novel.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 12, 2016
3/5 61% The Lost Arcade (2016) A small gem of a film‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 12, 2016
2/5 66% Anthropoid (2016) The villains are a mass of helmets shouting "Schnell!" or "Scheisse!" or even, occasionally, "Schnell!" and "Scheisse!" Let's hope they got paid extra.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 10, 2016
4/5 83% Sausage Party (2016) The whole thing is so tasty, you may just want seconds.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 10, 2016
2/5 77% The Lovers And The Despot (2016) It's one hell of a yarn, which makes The Lovers and the Despot's strangely soporific style something of a disappointment.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Aug 5, 2016
3/5 58% Bad Moms (2016) Bad Moms is to uncircumcised penises as The Third Man is to cuckoo clocks‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 28, 2016
2/5 65% The Land (2016) Misery porn with no climax‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 27, 2016
3/5 66% Nerve (2016) The pros slightly edge out the cons to make this perils-of-the-dark-web story appealing, and potentially a breakout success for the junior high set.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 26, 2016
2/5 75% Lights Out (2016) This is a movie that just floats along until it becomes socially irresponsible not to divulge some sort of explanation.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 19, 2016
1/5 4% Hillary's America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party (2016) The cinematic equivalent of a drunk man at a sports bar sucking back whole jalapeño peppers hoping for applause without ever being dared.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 18, 2016
4/5 35% Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016) There's a craftiness in the script that isn't always present in these performance-based, R-rated comedies.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jul 5, 2016
2/5 36% The Legend of Tarzan (2016) The best way to do a Tarzan film in 2016? Find a new story to tell instead.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 29, 2016
3/5 47% Free State of Jones (2016) The Free State of Jones is an anti-war film with a commie message that still glamorizes southern pride, hard work and the Good Book. It's a nuanced message far too rare in our current political state.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 23, 2016
4/5 78% The Shallows (2016) What could have been mere summertime chum is actually one of the more cleverly constructed B-movies in quite some time.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 23, 2016
2/5 22% The Duel (2016) The Duel wants to build to a feverish Heart of Darkness/Apocalypse Now climax, but has trouble determining how to get there.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 21, 2016
3/5 69% Central Intelligence (2016) These are gifted men working in immensely broad strokes, mugging for the cheap seats, giving those of us willing to let our guard down for two hours a much-needed opportunity to let off some steam.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 16, 2016
3/5 94% Finding Dory (2016) DeGeneres's vocal performance is extraordinary, effortlessly shifting from jokes to self-perpetuated anxiety attacks.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 14, 2016
3/5 77% Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping (2016) No musical mockumentary can avoid comparisons to This Is Spinal Tap, so you may as well go for a near carbon copy. The gamble pays off.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Jun 1, 2016
2/5 5% The Do-Over (2016) Surely this movie must be almost over, you think, as you jab the pause button on your remote - only to find you are at the 50-minute mark with another 58 to go.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 31, 2016
3/5 71% Holy Hell (2016) An uneven blend of news program, suspense narrative and toward the end, somewhat saccharine self-help exercise.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 27, 2016
3/5 30% Manhattan Night (Manhattan Nocturne) (2016) It's almost as if some actual drama pokes through the movie despite the better efforts of DeCubills' strange fealty to straightforward genre conventions.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 19, 2016
95% Black Girl (La noire de...) (1966) Black Girl radiates with an expressive tone, despite some script compression and the typical production obstacles of a mid-60s independent film.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 18, 2016
4/5 86% Lamb (2015) Much of Lamb's run time is spent simply absorbing the culture, and Zeleke has a really sharp eye.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 15, 2016
2/5 4% The Darkness (2016) When you find yourself yearning for the thorough world-building of the Insidious franchise, you know you are in trouble.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 13, 2016
3/5 78% What We Become (Sorgenfri) (2016) It's the same low-budget horror flick you've seen many times before, but it's nice to see some local variants on a familiar theme.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 12, 2016
2/5 22% Pelé: Birth of a Legend (2016) Considering this is the first biopic of one of the world's most beloved athletes, it's too bad such a predictable and ham-fisted kids' flick was the goal.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 11, 2016
4/5 95% Presenting Princess Shaw (2016) Most people will find Thru You Princess inspirational. A few will find it infuriating. But that's frequently the case with a good documentary.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 10, 2016
3/5 24% Being Charlie (2016) Despite its addiction to cliches, by the time Being Charlie ends it's a little bit emotional, thanks a great deal to Robinson's performance.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted May 5, 2016
1/5 7% Mother's Day (2016) Mother's Day is garbage, but it's a wholesome type of garbage they just don't make anymore.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 28, 2016
1/5 10% Papa: Hemingway in Cuba (2016) In the spirit of poorly mimicking Hemingway, I'll offer my six word review: Cuban permits don't make good films.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 27, 2016
2/5 93% LoveTrue (2016) I'm looking forward to Har'el bringing her considerable formal talents to a subject more deserving of the technique.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 22, 2016
4/5 100% Burden (2017) At first, no one would ever connect this placid, agreeable work with the madman who did Shoot, but it's a testament to Marrinan and Dewey that this film gets us there.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 20, 2016
2/5 3% Nina (2016) While not a disaster for the ages, there's still a lot to Nina that feels like a fib.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 20, 2016
3/5 91% The Witness (2016) Despite these revelations, there's still no smoking gun for Bill Genovese, and it is in this frustration where The Witness grows into something more than a cold case crime show.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 18, 2016
3/5 90% Barbershop: The Next Cut (2016) The movie doesn't pretend to solve any problems, but shows that community and communication- and in this case laughter - might.‐ Guardian
Read More | Posted Apr 12, 2016