Company Men - Rotten Tomatoes
NAME: Cassady, Lyn

LAST KNOWN WHEREABOUTS: The Men Who Stare at Goats (2009), alias George Clooney.

HISTORY: Recruited for an ultra-secret military intelligence unit specializing in parapsychological skills, specifically for his telekinetic powers. Stopped a goat's heart with just his mind, and old Hollywood good looks.

STATUS: DISAVOWED. Last seen high on LSD and ascending into the sky with New Earth Army leader Bill Django in a purloined helicopter.

THREAT ASSESSMENT: High if you're a goat with a weak heart. Harmless otherwise, except maybe to himself.