Mortuary Reviews

  • Oct 16, 2016

    Ok, this is a bad movie. I knew it was going to be bad, and was fully ready for a bad movie, but not this level of painfully boring bad. The story is bland, the characters are bland, and the scares are non-existent. Even Hooper's trademark dark humor misses the mark. There's not really any positives I can offer other than it was fun to see Denise Crosby in a film. Simply put, this is a terrible film that's not worth any of your time. 1/2 star

    Ok, this is a bad movie. I knew it was going to be bad, and was fully ready for a bad movie, but not this level of painfully boring bad. The story is bland, the characters are bland, and the scares are non-existent. Even Hooper's trademark dark humor misses the mark. There's not really any positives I can offer other than it was fun to see Denise Crosby in a film. Simply put, this is a terrible film that's not worth any of your time. 1/2 star

  • Oct 13, 2014

    I wanted to like this because the idea was interesting, but the dialogue and acting were so bad I couldn't sit through it. Too bad, because with some changes it could have been a great B movie.

    I wanted to like this because the idea was interesting, but the dialogue and acting were so bad I couldn't sit through it. Too bad, because with some changes it could have been a great B movie.

  • Jul 16, 2013

    No good. Except for the terrific effort put in by Dan Byrd, there is nothing new or scary here. Tobe Hooper has lost his touch and needs to retire while he's still ahead, although he may have gone to far already.....

    No good. Except for the terrific effort put in by Dan Byrd, there is nothing new or scary here. Tobe Hooper has lost his touch and needs to retire while he's still ahead, although he may have gone to far already.....

  • Jun 16, 2013

    wow, this movie is really bad.

    wow, this movie is really bad.

  • Mar 21, 2013

    Mortuary has moments of being a return to the Hooper of yesteryear but flies off the rails by the time of the ending. Mortuary suffers from bad cgi, I'm talking so bad that it makes the quality of the movie suffer, which is somewhat of a shame as it was okay. Movies like Mortuary are hard to grade because I am a Tobe Hooper fan and it is one of those that is moderately entertaining but kind of sucks.

    Mortuary has moments of being a return to the Hooper of yesteryear but flies off the rails by the time of the ending. Mortuary suffers from bad cgi, I'm talking so bad that it makes the quality of the movie suffer, which is somewhat of a shame as it was okay. Movies like Mortuary are hard to grade because I am a Tobe Hooper fan and it is one of those that is moderately entertaining but kind of sucks.

  • Feb 27, 2013

    It's not boring, if that helps...but...the acting is awful, the CGI is some of the worst I've ever seen and the story is all over the place. A lot of things either weren't explained or just didn't make sense. The SALT stuff was laughable. Now there are a few familiar faces, Crosby being the big one. The lead kid was the kid in the Hills Have Eyes remake. The lead girl, who I read was 35 at the time(great genes!), was the girl the Sherminator claimed he slept with in American Pie and the bully was Alfalfa in The Little Rascals movie...so he's just hard to take seriously as a bully. Besides that, everyone else is awful. The cop being the worst, but the Realtor that doesn't utter one line without laughing his ass off is so bad. Why is Hooper considered a great director again?

    It's not boring, if that helps...but...the acting is awful, the CGI is some of the worst I've ever seen and the story is all over the place. A lot of things either weren't explained or just didn't make sense. The SALT stuff was laughable. Now there are a few familiar faces, Crosby being the big one. The lead kid was the kid in the Hills Have Eyes remake. The lead girl, who I read was 35 at the time(great genes!), was the girl the Sherminator claimed he slept with in American Pie and the bully was Alfalfa in The Little Rascals movie...so he's just hard to take seriously as a bully. Besides that, everyone else is awful. The cop being the worst, but the Realtor that doesn't utter one line without laughing his ass off is so bad. Why is Hooper considered a great director again?

  • Jan 31, 2013

    75% "Together we can stop graveyard babies."-Sheriff Howell (Michael Shamus Wiles) Mixed bag of horrors, from Bobby Fowler and fast moving black mold to the death pits, from Return of the Jedi.

    75% "Together we can stop graveyard babies."-Sheriff Howell (Michael Shamus Wiles) Mixed bag of horrors, from Bobby Fowler and fast moving black mold to the death pits, from Return of the Jedi.

  • Nov 09, 2012

    Evil black mold. I guess my bathroom is evil lol.

    Evil black mold. I guess my bathroom is evil lol.

  • Oct 16, 2012

    This was actually a really good movie, it was surprisingly good. Except for the ending. I was really disappointed how such a good movie could end so so bad. It was worth watching and I would probably watch it again. I recommend it if you want a good scare.

    This was actually a really good movie, it was surprisingly good. Except for the ending. I was really disappointed how such a good movie could end so so bad. It was worth watching and I would probably watch it again. I recommend it if you want a good scare.

  • Oct 08, 2012

    this movie was pretty good but it was also dumb in some parts of it.

    this movie was pretty good but it was also dumb in some parts of it.