Private Lessons - Movie Reviews - Rotten Tomatoes

Private Lessons Reviews

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October 12, 2016
Wow this movie is terrible on every level. I want my 87 minutes back!
½ October 3, 2016
Couldn't deal with this movie. quit 15 minutes in. Guess I should have read the description before trying to watch.
June 30, 2014
I've seen some bad movies, but none worse than this!
½ June 20, 2013
Private Lessons barely passes for a film once it's sexual material runs out because from then it just becomes an empty plotted and stupid story without valid direction or entertainment, but if you look underneath the sexual content of the first half you'll find literally nothing.

Private Lessons is supposedly a sex comedy, but I found anything other than the seductive Sylvie Kristel to be merely rudimentary and pointed out that the lack of effort put into a film of Private Lessons calibre is annoyingly hollow and utterly forgettable. Private Lessons follows the plot of an entertaining pornographic film, but with less nudity than enough to be sufficiently entertaining. The plot is a teenage boy's fantasy about a sexy maid who is attracted to 15 year olds and is willing to strip and put out to ensure that point is made valid, but during the scenes without the actual maid I was merely bored to death by Eric Brown who couldn't hold his own or supply any form of entertainment which leaves us wondering why Sylvie Kristel would have sex with him in the first place. Then we remember its because of the film's stupid plot and poor casting which resulted in a series of forgettable and tedious characters who Sylvie Kristel is forced to share the screen with.
Even though her performance isn't perfect, she supplies the sexual attractiveness the story would require, and she brings some of her Emmanuelle charm over even though its burdened with untalented directing and stupendous writing. She's still sexy though, but it could have been capitalised on more rather than used briefly before she became no longer important to the story.
The cinematography is also terrible because its unbalanced the whole time and make things look like the entire film was done in front of an acid-tripping blue screen, and there are pointless random zooms to pointless spots which don't benefit the film at all and confuse the simple minded viewers that would watch this crap with the intention of receiving entertainment.
Private Lessons essentially only has the appeal of a porn movie plot being played out into a more "realistic" setting and appealing to a teenage audience with the nudity in use, but to fans of films it won't have the same effect but rather bring out the disdain for cheaply-plotted films and comedies which are less funny than The Last House on the Left. There's vague entertainment for a while, but it all completely falls apart once Sylvie Kristel "dies", because that's when the already lifeless "film" does as well.
½ January 5, 2013
I really wanted to see this when I was like 12, so finally watching it now was kind of awesome. But only kind of.
½ January 27, 2012
Even though this is listed as a comedy, it really isn't all that funny. Not unless you are laughing at how no one ended up going to jail for making this. The plot is very thin and there is little satisfaction. You may feel unclean after you watch this.
½ December 14, 2011
Rod Stewart in the soundtrack! :-)

This one's indeed a sex comedy; the blackmail subplot was a mere add-on, as if non-existent... a very light film which one could watch during any idle hours of the day; a must-see/must-have for 80's lovers, you can't go wrong with Kristel in this one....
Super Reviewer
August 28, 2011
An incerdibly generic and boring 80's sex comedy. Not funny at all, extremely boring and predictable. The movie does deliver in the nudity department however for whatever that is worth to you. Not very good at all.
March 13, 2011
I remember this movie from years ago..had a friend who has since past actually work on the set. He use to say he had a cameo on it but I don't remember seeing him. Love to watch it again to check it out,
February 11, 2011
i like it when i was fourteen, now its not so good
January 16, 2011
I liked that Lady,She taught me alot things,maybe she knows the song 'cherry blossoms" ,L.A. Dude
Super Reviewer
½ January 11, 2011
I saw this movie on TV a long time ago, but I recall not liking it. It wasn't romantic or erotic or funny or anything. I didn't care for it.
September 21, 2010
Hi, Kind of lame movie that the kid look younger to me than 15 but it was set in the 1980 in which was nice to see the awful outfits in it.
July 11, 2010
Painful to watch as the lead actor Eric Brown is completely incompentent as an actor. The plot and dialogue are just as painful and stilted when performed. While this may be many young boys fantasy they do lock up all the teachers that prey on their students now and that is all I could think of as I watched this.
Super Reviewer
July 6, 2010
A star just for Sylvia Kristel, because the acting and script are awful. The blackmail sub-plot is just stupid beyond belief.
½ June 4, 2010
Pretty much the perviest movie I've ever seen. Why does a cougar want to hook up with a kid that looks like he's 13?
March 21, 2010
thank uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
½ March 19, 2010
l will surely love to in this boyz shoes,gr8 movie.
February 23, 2010
Remember the big controversy about the scene in "Birth" where an underage boy climbs into the bathtub with Nicole Kidman? It's truly a sign of how much society has changed since 1981 when a movie like "Private Lessons" can be released, show numerous scenes of an adult woman seducing and having sex with a 15-year old boy, and barely raise an eyebrow! Not only that, but it also would become a surprise box-office hit, likely because it depicted your average teenage boy's ultimate fantasy. Despite its potentially controversial subject matter, "Private Lessons" doesn't make any attempt to deal the serious ramifications of the premise and is basically just a lame-brained sex comedy; it isn't a particularly good comedy either, as the production values are cheap, the plotting is ludicrous, and most of the humour is pretty forced. However, I can't really dissuade anyone from checking this one out as it is a pretty fascinating time capsule of an era where people had a much different mindset, and there's NO chance in hell a film like this would ever get made these days!
½ February 15, 2010
(**): Thumbs Down

Oh, those 80's sex comedies! This one is weirdly entertaining at times (Sylvia Kristel is a pedophile here!) but ends up being just too silly for me.
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